hugznkisses21 Posted March 19, 2005 Posted March 19, 2005 That I feel like i could just pack it all in and end things. God i love him so much but i make him my everything in the sence that if he is in a bad mood my world comes crashing down.....if he says something with lsight attitude cause he is tired or mad at someone else ro has a bad day my day is ruined ...I feel awful inside and i feel like the only thing i can do it take control and by doing that I mean tell him i cant do this I think im not the right person for you. He replys why cause we argue or this or that....you cant take the easy way out everyone argues and everyone has bad days, moments or attitude at times. I dont know what to do....we have so much love for eachother, have so much fun and have a wonderful life together but it these stupid moment that make me feel at the time that maybe its best i walk. For instatnce....he phones me up last night....hes going out with friends and gives me attitude and sounds miserable to me....im all like whats wrong, what did i do..NOTHIN im tired blah blah....well if u are that tired why dont u not go out get some rest..........No blah blah....with attitude. And i know what he is like when he is tired and this is exacally it...cranky...my whole thing is is the 10 second u are the phone with me to say goodnight caus eua re going to to have fun with your buddies the least u can do it sound u are someone happy to talk to the love of you life...........10 SECONDS it ALL I ask for. So this morning..... We made plans that he would come here and stay the night and spend time together...after he was done work. I call no answer...he calls back saying hes on his way to work he slept in etc....not important....but he is in the mood again...whats wrong...nothing (as usual for christ sake me this one is getting old) sounds like something...ITS NOT...asks about our plans....everything is good so as a joke im like hey u pick up any girls last night.........and he raises his voice....DONT U TRUST ME.....like whoa....so he goes into saying he doesnt like when i ask that cause it makes him feel i dont trust him and etc. So he is on his way over...he is still sounding crusty...i dont know why he says i worry too much about things....cause i really do....but its his bad moods like these that make me what to throw in the towel but i cant. How can i be a stronger person to just let him have his moods and brush them off and not make them a reslut of my own happyness. I know he isnt cheated he never would hurt me he is a very honest guy but he is moody and stuff.....he doesnt yell at me or anything but i dont know what to do
d'Arthez Posted March 19, 2005 Posted March 19, 2005 You must learn to understand that people can have a bad day at the office. It has nothing to do with you, or what you have done, but with something a manager or collegue has done. You should not feel that every bad mood of your boyfriend is a personal attack on you. You can't control what he is feeling especially in a situation you are not present in yourself. I realize you are in a very strange situation, and I guess that it made you somewhat over-sensitive for these things. Come to accept that. It' s very hard to do; it is as if you take on a mother-role towards him, and that is not something he is looking for in a life-partner. You should not waste a good relationship with your boyfriend because of that. You should explain to him, where your worries come from, and also that it is quite natural for you to feel and act that way. Also explain to him, that you are willing to change your ways, but that you need his support to help you achieve that. Work on the issues in your relationship together, it will make your relationship still stronger.
Barby Posted March 19, 2005 Posted March 19, 2005 I have no words of advice for you what-so-ever for that I apologize....what I'm going to say....I'm sure you're not going to like..................... You have been going through this drama and insecurity and questioning your relationship for so long now....I know you love him but I doubt anything anyone of us can say to you will give you the "magic tools" to help ease the strain in this relationship. First it was lack of intimacy on his part, he's constantly going out with friends (when that time should right fully be yours of course since you two live a distance away and you don't see him enough). You are in fact insecure and he probably picks up on that when you say things like........ as a joke im like hey u pick up any girls last night.........and he raises his voice....DONT U TRUST ME.... and try and play it off as a joke. If in fact he probably sees right through it and it could be that............ 1) it gets old and annoying to be questioned and not trusted. 2) gets overly defensive because in fact when he says he's going out with his friends, he indeed is with another woman therefor when you bring it up he feels guilty so in turn gets snappy. I don't know what the deal is but I honestly truly don't think you two are going to be happy i mean truly happy together until maybe you two move in together or..you get your overly sensitive and insecurity issues under control. This is no way an attack on you or your personality or anything but just the best words I can give you based on the this and other posts from before where the issue always seems to be the same (insecurity and being overly sensitive). I hope things can get better for you soon!
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