Author liove Posted November 29, 2014 Author Posted November 29, 2014 ^^ I think this video would be most beneficial to you. Also: "even the numbers are in our favor and we had a lot of "signs" from destiny as well" Just, no. haha i love the guy in the video he is funny!
Author liove Posted November 29, 2014 Author Posted November 29, 2014 If you literally can't stop responding to him when he inevitably comes sniffing back around, then no. You're not exaggerating. NC is the way to move on as fast as possible. no i cannot stop responding but iwas wondering whether i should maybe leave a "small door" open in case he thought about it and wants to make it work...
Woggle Posted November 29, 2014 Posted November 29, 2014 Men commit when we see something worth committing to. 3
Author liove Posted November 29, 2014 Author Posted November 29, 2014 Men commit when we see something worth committing to. what i dont get is that he wanted to commit the first time so he was something worth in me what happened this time? maybe because the first time i was too hard to get and emotionnally unavailable and now is not the case anymore...
snowflakes88 Posted November 29, 2014 Posted November 29, 2014 there isnt really anything to do besides "moving on"? imight be missing out something but i think we all can have something if we really want Sure, if you're talking about achieving a personal goal that requires effort only from you. Like, going after a new job, achieving a new level of education, getting the home you want, etc. But a relationship takes two people. Both people have to want it. You can't force someone to want to be with you if they don't.
elaine567 Posted November 29, 2014 Posted November 29, 2014 i told him i think is better that i block his number and he told me that he will miss our conversation but that he understands Listen to what he is saying here. I guess he wants this to stop as much as you do. He cannot get past the original problem to allow him to commit to you, but you are still there and available so he just strings you along. He realises this is going nowhere, but he is not going to do anything to stop it because it is still fun and there is still sex on offer. You want and need a relationship, so it is up to you to make that happen. Block him, go find yourself and then look for a man who will commit to you and only you.
Author liove Posted November 29, 2014 Author Posted November 29, 2014 Sure, if you're talking about achieving a personal goal that requires effort only from you. Like, going after a new job, achieving a new level of education, getting the home you want, etc. But a relationship takes two people. Both people have to want it. You can't force someone to want to be with you if they don't. i dont agree with that. you cant force it but you can put the chances on your side
Author liove Posted November 29, 2014 Author Posted November 29, 2014 Listen to what he is saying here. I guess he wants this to stop as much as you do. He cannot get past the original problem to allow him to commit to you, but you are still there and available so he just strings you along. He realises this is going nowhere, but he is not going to do anything to stop it because it is still fun and there is still sex on offer. You want and need a relationship, so it is up to you to make that happen. Block him, go find yourself and then look for a man who will commit to you and only you. i guess you're right and it makes me sad he also told me that he would love to go back to the beginning of our history, and that he regrets that it didnt work out as planned and that he has only one regret : what if it would have worked out, if i wasnt so distant at the beginning.
snowflakes88 Posted November 29, 2014 Posted November 29, 2014 i dont agree with that. you cant force it but you can put the chances on your side Ok lol. Good luck with that.
KatZee Posted November 30, 2014 Posted November 30, 2014 no i cannot stop responding but iwas wondering whether i should maybe leave a "small door" open in case he thought about it and wants to make it work... If you feel like being strung on for weeks, months, years, sure. Knock yourself out. This is probably the #1 mistake girls make.
KatZee Posted November 30, 2014 Posted November 30, 2014 he also told me that he would love to go back to the beginning of our history, and that he regrets that it didnt work out as planned and that he has only one regret : what if it would have worked out, if i wasnt so distant at the beginning. This is the biggest load of garbage, hahaha. I literally am LOL'ing right now. He just doesn't want to be honest and tell you why he REALLY won't be in a relationship with you, so he's going to bring up the past and hope the excuse sticks. Come ON. You WE'RE emotionally unavailable. Now you're not. Do you think if he was so intent on dating you he wouldn't date you? If he did, he would be losing his goddamn MIND! that you're now emotionally available. He'd be falling all over himself locking you down. He wouldn't just cut off his own nose to spite his face. "Aw shucks. It's so unfortunate we didn't work out those months back. You totally weren't emotionally open to me... you are now, but man. We coulda worked back then. Oh well." Does this even sound logical? 3
Guitarisgood Posted November 30, 2014 Posted November 30, 2014 From what I gather 1) He doesn't want you now because when he did (initial dating period), you burned him down 2) He then didn't want you after as it was too easy when YOU started chasing and gave him all he needs There is a saying 'she/ he who walks away, holds the power'. That is all you can do now. Maybe he'll realise what he wants with you then but this needs time and time away from someone to allow each person to think. 2
Frank2thepoint Posted November 30, 2014 Posted November 30, 2014 i dont agree with that. you cant force it but you can put the chances on your side You're obsessing over a guy that doesn't want to be with you, instead of moving on, and finding someone that does want to be with you.
elaine567 Posted November 30, 2014 Posted November 30, 2014 he also told me that he would love to go back to the beginning of our history, and that he regrets that it didnt work out as planned and that he has only one regret : what if it would have worked out, if i wasnt so distant at the beginning. And this is how he continues to have a hold on you, he is guilt tripping you and making you feel to blame for why it will never work out and also why he doesn't have to commit to you. You cannot rewrite the past, so you can never solve this. Hence as long as you put up with this situation, he is in control. One day he will commit to someone else, whether you are still hanging around or not. Get yourself sorted out now, before he breaks your heart completely Walk away, block him out of your life. 1
Tayken Posted November 30, 2014 Posted November 30, 2014 You're obsessing over a guy that doesn't want to be with you, instead of moving on, and finding someone that does want to be with you. Unfortunately there are many women like this out there......funny how they will compete for the attention of men/guys, but not for a job/career Like the son "flawless" by Beyonce'....society teaches women to aspire for marriage, but not for what is more important
most_distant_galaxy Posted November 30, 2014 Posted November 30, 2014 Unfortunately there are many women like this out there......funny how they will compete for the attention of men/guys, but not for a job/career Like the son "flawless" by Beyonce'....society teaches women to aspire for marriage, but not for what is more important Yes, most women do such mistakes (myself in my early 20s included). But then, there comes a time when a woman understands its more fulfilling to fight for things that are in her control, like career or education or self development. Things beyond our control, such as attraction, have little to do with hard work.
Author liove Posted November 30, 2014 Author Posted November 30, 2014 guys, i have a very good career at only 26; I really have everything one can ask for. I dont think about mariage even though i am afraid sometimes i wil die alone (and that is because i am too picky) anyway, i know he might give you the impression that he is playig bla bla but he is not that kind of a person. he has always been honest with me and iknow he a is a valuable man, real and not manipulating.
Author liove Posted November 30, 2014 Author Posted November 30, 2014 Unfortunately there are many women like this out there......funny how they will compete for the attention of men/guys, but not for a job/career Like the son "flawless" by Beyonce'....society teaches women to aspire for marriage, but not for what is more important i am sorry but for me having a family and giving a bitrh to achild is more fulfilling at the end of your life than having a career (basically you are working to make someone else rich) . passions family and friends are the most importat thing in life and they are free as well
Author liove Posted November 30, 2014 Author Posted November 30, 2014 (edited) Come ON. You WE'RE emotionally unavailable. Now you're not. Do you think if he was so intent on dating you he wouldn't date you? If he did, he would be losing his goddamn MIND! that you're now emotionally available. He'd be falling all over himself locking you down. He wouldn't just cut off his own nose to spite his face. "Aw shucks. It's so unfortunate we didn't work out those months back. You totally weren't emotionally open to me... you are now, but man. We coulda worked back then. Oh well." Does this even sound logical? i just love your post even though it not that logical to me! you use too many idioms for a non native or maybe he was into me back then, but not anymore; and besides i can uderstand him: we dated for 2 months even though i was thinking about someone else hoping to work out with the other guy. how could he now trust me that this wont happen again? or even worse: "she didnt like me at the beginning, now she chose me because she doesnt have other choice" Edited November 30, 2014 by liove additio 1
KatZee Posted November 30, 2014 Posted November 30, 2014 i just love your post even though it not that logical to me! you use too many idioms for a non native or maybe he was into me back then, but not anymore; and besides i can uderstand him: we dated for 2 months even though i was thinking about someone else hoping to work out with the other guy. how could he now trust me that this wont happen again? or even worse: "she didnt like me at the beginning, now she chose me because she doesnt have other choice" No. He just doesn't want to be with you. Think of it very simply. No need for mental gymnastics or trying to put a puzzle together with x, y, and z or with who, what, where, when, why, or how. He just won't commit. Doesn't really matter why and he's not going to be truthful anyway. Block and don't hold out for hope. 1
smackie9 Posted November 30, 2014 Posted November 30, 2014 i guess you're right and it makes me sad he also told me that he would love to go back to the beginning of our history, and that he regrets that it didnt work out as planned and that he has only one regret : what if it would have worked out, if i wasnt so distant at the beginning. Men will do and say anything when the supply of sex is cut off and he knows your weakness and is using that to reel you in. Stick with NC. He wasn't willing to fulfill your expectation of commitment so why are you still lingering?
RebelWithoutACause Posted November 30, 2014 Posted November 30, 2014 Why are suddenly so into him? Is it because you can't have him? If this is the case, you need to question your own motives and reasons why (and IF) you really want this relationship to happen. Btw the below nonsense he's been telling you is what people say when they want to shift and blame their loss of interest on the other person. Which is very manipulative and passive aggressive. Open up you eyes, he's got you wrapped around his manipulative finger... he also told me that he would love to go back to the beginning of our history, and that he regrets that it didnt work out as planned and that he has only one regret : what if it would have worked out, if i wasnt so distant at the beginning. he told me that he regrets that it did not work out the first time and that he cannot stop thinking about the past and the beginning of the story when i was too distant and thinking about another guy. also, he told me he is afraid he wont get attached and that i might get hurt.
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