polaske93 Posted November 29, 2014 Posted November 29, 2014 Everyday I think of her, I can't escape the thought no matter what I Do. She was the love of my life, perfect in every way.. almost, after the breakup I found out from a mutual friend that she had cheated on me with 3 different guys in a matter of months. She also immediately started dating one of my friends which tore me up. Why do i still miss her? I would never try a relationship again, but I miss our phone calls, I miss her voice, and all of the things we shared. We both love art and music, and over a period of 9 months she became my best friend. I have broke no contact this week and sent her a few texts, all with no reply. This **** is eating me up! I just want to have her back in my life, even though I shouldnt. 1
M30USA Posted November 29, 2014 Posted November 29, 2014 The heart is irrational. Not that I'm a believer in evolution, but it seems that nature has built-in measures to preserve relationships. Since it's primarily about the welfare of children, nature doesn't care about you or your ex. As long as you stay together to raise a child (which I'm not sure you have). This is why you can't shake off these feelings. If we could easily shake off these feelings, 100% of children would have one parent (or zero).
IfiKnewThen Posted November 29, 2014 Posted November 29, 2014 i feel for you. of course you love hate her. she filled you once. you love and miss that. now she makes u feel empty and hurt. of course you hate that. who wouldnt? i admire that you tried to text her and reach out. i dont care what people say. i do think this does make you a better person. you tried to be pro-active and try. youre human for petes sakes. but it hurts so bad to get rejected and ignored. hurts to the very core. hang in there please. dont text her now. only give her as much as she gives you for now. you dont hear from her. she doesnt get to hear from you. stay strong. pray.....try to do anything to pass the time and get your mind off of her. anything thats healthy and self serving...or serving another with care. be blessed.
travelbug1996 Posted November 30, 2014 Posted November 30, 2014 Its called traumatic bonding. Google it.
Ronni_W Posted November 30, 2014 Posted November 30, 2014 polaske, Somewhere along the way, your sense of identity got confused and now it thinks that your ex is an integral part of itself. But she's not. YOU still love art. YOU still love music. YOU still have all the same good 'stuff' that makes YOU the same person that you were before you ever set eyes on her. YOU are the power of you. Not anything or anyone on the outside of YOU. Your brain is also telling you wrong stuff about her: YOU already know that she was NOT "perfect in every way"...but you brain is still saying that to you; it's lying to you, basically. STOP letting it do that to you. Your sane and rational part has a better view of everything; the part that's telling you that you shouldn't want her in your life -- and YOU already know why you shouldn't -- listen to this part of you, instead. Break-ups suck bad enough without letting our own "inner bits and pieces" mess us up even further, with their stupid nonsense. Tell your brain to stop lying and your sense of identity to get a grip. Get tough with both of them! 2
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