DRStone Posted November 28, 2014 Posted November 28, 2014 New here so haven't read through many old posts yet and seeing as I didn't find an answer to my question thought I'd ask it here.. I'm 19 and don't get out much, I work full time and study a degree in the evenings / weekends, I don't have many friends and the friends I do have we're all pretty introverted and don't really head out to clubs very much (Which I am OK with btw!). I'm getting pretty lonely these days as even though I'm surrounded by people I care about whether they be friends of colleagues I find myself not have someone to confide in and be close too. So I decided to try out online dating, read a few "how to write your profile" type blogs and did some of those personality quiz's on these OLD sites to try and find more matches. The problem I'm getting is that 95% of my matches are so far out of my league its ridiculous, they're really beautiful girls and I am.. well, average - below average with looks. I'm messaging them none the less but not getting any replies and I'd imagine it's because they're being filtered out using the star rating. I've read a lot about how to write these first messages and I've tried to include some of the stuff they mentioned but I also wrote a lot of my own stuff in there too. How am I supposed to make this work if my top matches and probably filtering out my messages?
GTR King Posted November 28, 2014 Posted November 28, 2014 Best idea is to get your 5 best pictures and put them on your profile. You must be smiling and no selfies/pictures with other girls etc and topless pictures is a big no... Your info must be short/interesting etc. When you message the girls it should say something like... Hey how are you? You been up to much xx. If you try that you should get some luck...
greenman77 Posted November 28, 2014 Posted November 28, 2014 In my experience with OLD I found that putting so much effort into messages is at the end of the day a waste of time. First time I tried OkCupid (about 8 months ago) every message I would send would be following some guidelines I found online and they were pretty lengthy messages with very little success rate (1 to 10 response rate) although my pictures weren't great. I wasn't successful and didn't go in any dates. Second time around (now) my messages are very short (less than 100 characters) and my response rate is about 1 in 5. Massive improvement! I also got much better and interesting pictures. And I also finally got a date out of it. I've only been able to go out with one girl so far though but I've seen her 3 times already which is great. So I'd say message all the girls your interested in even though you feel they might be out of your league. I did and I got some of them to respond. They didn't lead to dates but hey they responded right?! And don't put too much effort into them. Just make them short and fun! Good luck!
phineas Posted November 28, 2014 Posted November 28, 2014 "How's it going?" is what an okcupid study showed was the most responded to initial message. it works for me. women for the most part look at your pictures. Very few women on OLD bother to read my profile. They don't even look at my height most times it seems. Granted i'm early 40's and going for mid 30's and on so just having a job, a car, and my own place gives me a serious advantage.
greenman77 Posted November 28, 2014 Posted November 28, 2014 And don't get too down if you're not getting responses. You will have days where you message 10 girls and none will respond and then there will be days (they are quite rare though) where you message another 10 girls and 7 answer back very quickly. That's OLD for ya! It's a roller coaster ride!
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