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My date confessed she's seeing other guys on Tinder

Metrosexy

By Metrosexy
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FitChick Established Member

FitChick

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She's seeing other guys on Tindle? I didn't know Kindle and Tinder had a baby.

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kaylan Established Member

kaylan

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Don't hate Tinder, be grateful you found out early what a little attention seeking tramp you are dating.

 

This.

 

I tend to assume both myself and the girls i see are dating around. And I'm not one to get physical with more than one girl at a time, but i still may talk to other options until we broach the topic of exclusivity or get physical.

 

This all said i never bring up in detail and throw it in her face that I'm dating other people. Jeez... Talk about a tactless and disrespectful skankoid.

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Daisy-oliviaWentcher Established Member

Daisy-oliviaWentcher

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Nah the easiest thing to do and best thing to do is to let this girl go. Is she trying to make you jealous? maybe? is she just a ho? could be. She's already broken your heart, if you got any closer to her she'd probably rip it out and chop it up in bite sized pieces. Do yourself a favor and look somewhere else and for someone who is much better.

veggirl Established Member

veggirl

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Those girls that so quickly send you sexy pics, they're also sending them to every other guy in the world. Don't let a few dates and some half-naked pics from a girl get you all messed up. Your mistake was in expecting more from this girl than she is capable of. She is just the type of girl you hook up with, not try and date.

 

This.

 

You sound very inexperienced. Maybe she would give you some sexual experiences but you're not gonna get any relationship stuff with a chick who sends nudes after TWO DATES (or was it even sooner?)

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Metrosexy Member

Metrosexy

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Should I tell this girl how I'm feeling?

Telling her would immediately ruin the friendship and any chance I have with her though.

FitChick Established Member

FitChick

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If you're a friend now, there is nothing more.

kaylan Established Member

kaylan

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OP, move on and stop being desperate. Have some self respect and find a quality woman that will appreciate you.

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Metrosexy Member

Metrosexy

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Can I just ask one more thing?

 

Did I do the right thing by not attempting to touch her/escalate things? I only gave her flowers and a hand made christmas card telling her what a wonderful girl she is on the 4th date because I don't want to push things too fast in case I scared her away.

 

And also she's flying off this weekend to visit her mum in Europe for 3 months. (We live in Asia) That's also another reason why I don't want to push things too fast.

 

And it's going to be difficult to avoid each other because we're both actors. And we have mutual friends (although I hardly know her friends)

kaylan Established Member

kaylan

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Dude...why in the world would you want to get physical with this chick while shes likely skanking it up with multiple guys? Think about your health here.

 

And tbh, unless you have a deep connection with a woman and you two are dating exclusively, mushy flowers and a handmade Christmas card are a bad move. It makes you look like a sappy puppy dog that she knows she can have on a leash.

 

If a girl and I connected deeply on the first couple dates and we then were seeing just each other moving forward (exclusivity), then I would very much enjoy her doing something like that for me. If I didnt have a strong connection with a girl just yet, while I was also going out on dates with other women, then flowers and handmade cards telling me how wonderful I am, would certainly be coming on too strong.

 

Your case is the latter. You have to learn how to mirror the behavior of the person you are dating. Dont put too much more than what they are putting into things. And dont give too little effort compared to their effort. Go with the flow.

 

Forget this girl bro. She's not into you. Plus she's going to Europe and will likely be dating around with multiple guys over there. Since youre in Asia, Im sure you can find more quality traditional women than this chick. You seem like the kinda guy who needs that type of woman.

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Jules Dash Established Member

Jules Dash

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I would dump the whole thought of not touching a girl until she is in a relationship with you. I don't see you reaching that stage much with that approach. This woman strikes me as someone who Likes to be touched and you don't touch...

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Metrosexy Member

Metrosexy

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How do I start touching a girl then? I'm a really shy guy.

 

Could I start with a hug when I see her?

Toodaloo Established Member

Toodaloo

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Should I tell this girl how I'm feeling?

Telling her would immediately ruin the friendship and any chance I have with her though.

 

Metrosexy.

 

I honestly think the best thing you can do right now is cut all contact and learn how to treat yourself with dignity and respect.

 

This girl sends random strangers pictures of her body... She has no respect for herself let alone you. You are just some random guy that is being used for attention and an ego boost while she screws up your chances of getting real honest attention from one of the many great girls out there and destroys your ego and self esteem.

 

Stop it. Its only you that will end up hurting more than you do now.

lino Established Member

lino

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Another thing she said that hurt me is,

 

I've always thought all guys are jerks and only want to get into my pants. Until I installed Tinder and met these guys who are perfect gentlemen.

 

I was shocked. What about me???? I'm not a gentleman? 4 dates, I'm so sweet to her, comforting her because she couldn't attend a beauty pageant because she had to go overseas, being kind and considerate about what she likes, giving her a birthday surprise, every damn f-ucking thing women love their boyfriends to do, and what do I get?

 

A f-cking smack in the face. And she allows these 2 guys to sleep with her and cuddle. Wtf I'm really so disappointed yet at the same time I don't wanna give up. :(:(

 

Now you have learnt the hard way (like nearly all of us) to never listen to what women say... Listen to what they DO.

 

All women say they want a guy who is interested in more than just getting in their pants. Then you see them leaving the house of the biggest cunt you know, buttoning up their short with messed up hair.

 

Being the respectful guy wins you nothing and if you haven't learnt that from this, you'll learn it after the next several times it happens.

 

Hard to grasp this if you're a genuinely good hearted man but unfortunately the world works like that and we aren't valued very highly.

lino Established Member

lino

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Can I just ask one more thing?

 

Did I do the right thing by not attempting to touch her/escalate things? I only gave her flowers and a hand made christmas card telling her what a wonderful girl she is on the 4th date because I don't want to push things too fast in case I scared her away.

 

And also she's flying off this weekend to visit her mum in Europe for 3 months. (We live in Asia) That's also another reason why I don't want to push things too fast.

 

And it's going to be difficult to avoid each other because we're both actors. And we have mutual friends (although I hardly know her friends)

 

Word of advice. Never do the flowers and card again.

Do you think the guys f*cking her are doing that?

ascendotum Established Member

ascendotum

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You got blown out of the water by Tinder. If only she didn't download it for another few weeks you might have made it to the bedroom. I donlt think you would have ended up with anything serious though. For a girl who likes to send out sexy pics asap, she'll be popular with guys on there, and she'll love the attention. You should have escalated things by touching her more (esp the ones that send you sexy pics). No more flowers + handmade cards early either. You'll learn for next time. I don't think you will get anywhere with this one, if she's telling you about ending up in bed with other guys. If you want a crack at a fling with her then go for it, but for gf forget it. Those 2 other guys will be shmoozing her this week to tee up another night over with them and some booze.

guest569 Established Member

guest569

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Sounds like she just wants sex (with multiple partners) but you want an exclusive relationship or at least exclusive dating.

 

I would just steer clear of her. She's not what you are looking for although you thought she was initially.

 

You've done nothing wrong here. It's perfectly ok to not jump into bed straight away. Would you have wanted to sleep with her knowing what you know now?

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Metrosexy Member

Metrosexy

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Just 3 years ago, I was dating this girl. She's extremely gorgeous...has multiple facebook accounts because so many guys add her.

 

When I scored a date with her I was so happy. Just one night before our 2nd date, all of a sudden I received a text message from some random person saying "Marissa doesn't love you anymore".

 

I didn't think much of it. The next afternoon I proceeded to the venue of our 2nd date, excited about meeting her. I waited 15 minutes, she didn't come.

30 later I texted her to ask where she is. I called her multiple times and waited 2 hours before going home.

 

I logged in to Facebook on the way home and what I saw broke my heart. She changed her profile pic to one where she's locking lips with a guy. Like full on frenching.

 

That night I spoke to her and she said she met that guy at a bar a few days ago. She told me to delete her on facebook and remove her number, if I don't she will delete me anyway. I cried so hard so that night. (They broke off after a month)

 

Why do I keep meeting women like that. =(

 

 

And before this, a girl that I liked and we got along so well got killed in a motorbike accident.

 

I feel so sad now....why is falling in love so easy for others. Why is it so hard for me.

veggirl Established Member

veggirl

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you're way too desperate. flowers on a 3rd date or whatever was desperate. the way you are chasing this skank and wanting her attention is desperate.

 

meet a nice girl, not one that fks randoms from the internet.

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Metrosexy Member

Metrosexy

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I don't understand why people are calling me desperate when I'm not the one groping the girl the girl on the 2nd date. I was there for her when she felt down, cheering her up. (Her parents are going through a divorce)

 

And I gave her flowers and a card because I wanted her to smile again, not because I want to get into her pants.

Toodaloo Established Member

Toodaloo

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I don't understand why people are calling me desperate when I'm not the one groping the girl the girl on the 2nd date. I was there for her when she felt down, cheering her up. (Her parents are going through a divorce)

 

And I gave her flowers and a card because I wanted her to smile again, not because I want to get into her pants.

 

...and she has treated you like a pile of doggie doo on her shoe for your troubles...

 

Treat yourself as well as you have treated her and you may be in with a chance of finding someone decent, loving and caring, who will be there for you when you need them too rather than jacking off with other blokes.

 

Tough love is not easy but its there to try and stop you from getting hurt.

 

You are allowing these women to treat you like this. Stop it or you will never get anywhere and just live your life being used.

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veggirl Established Member

veggirl

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I don't understand why people are calling me desperate when I'm not the one groping the girl the girl on the 2nd date. I was there for her when she felt down, cheering her up. (Her parents are going through a divorce)

 

And I gave her flowers and a card because I wanted her to smile again, not because I want to get into her pants.

 

You are chasing her and your efforts are not reciprocated. That's what makes it look desperate.

 

The flowers and card are TOO MUCH so soon. That is relationship stuff, not "get to know you" stuff.

 

What is it you want from this girl, exactly?

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Metrosexy Member

Metrosexy

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I want to love and be loved back. Is that so difficult?

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PogoStick Established Member

PogoStick

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and throughout my 4 dates with her I didn't attempt to touch her at all. I'm the type who goes slow in the relationship and I will not touch a girl unless she is in a relationship with me.

 

And there she is, going to a guy's house on the 2nd date with him, playing games on the bed with him and his best friend and then spending the night together cuddling.

 

I guess you're an awesome virtuous prince, but that's not what she was looking for.

 

She sent you her sexy pics and talked about teaching you a sexy dance. How many hints does she need to give you?

 

Have you ever seen the Disney Little Mermaid, "Oh la la la go ahead and just FK the girl"

truth_seeker Established Member

truth_seeker

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OR...im going to insert a crazed theory here. You may be totally friendzoned or even worse...she thinks your gay.

 

I can't fathom why any chick would start showing me some other dudes washboard abs while I was talking to her and we were romantically interested in eachother.

 

Possibly friendzone... but I'm thinking from what the OP described she gets off on messing with guy's emotions. She wanted to make him feel jealous. See what his reaction would be that she can get other men. If OP is good looking... this girl could be insecure and lying to mess with OP's head. Twisted, yes, but all done because she is very insecure.

veggirl Established Member

veggirl

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I want to love and be loved back. Is that so difficult?

 

by a girl who climbs in bed with two strange guys she just met?

love from a girl who sends half naked pictures to every tom, dick and harry she meets online?

a girl who waxes poetic to you about all the hot guys she's meeting?

 

that's the girl you want love from?

 

to me it sounds like just any ole girl will do. that = desperate. that = no self-respect.

 

find a GOOD girl, one who doesn't send you half naked pictures within days!! Is THAT so difficult?

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