ThatChick Posted November 23, 2014 Posted November 23, 2014 I have been in a really crappy relationship for the past 4 years. We broke up 9 months ago, he treated me so horribly that I had enough. A friend of mine introduced me to her friend, someone shes known all her life. However, it was through FB, and he lives ALL the way in Ca..and I live in NYC. I figured what the hell, we will be friends. But omg, he is wonderful.. we developed deep feelings for eachother. I never have done this before. But how does a LD relationship work. I ave 2 children, he has none, and I am not really willing tor elocate. I know its hard, but is it possible?
J2911 Posted November 23, 2014 Posted November 23, 2014 I have been in a really crappy relationship for the past 4 years. We broke up 9 months ago, he treated me so horribly that I had enough. A friend of mine introduced me to her friend, someone shes known all her life. However, it was through FB, and he lives ALL the way in Ca..and I live in NYC. I figured what the hell, we will be friends. But omg, he is wonderful.. we developed deep feelings for eachother. I never have done this before. But how does a LD relationship work. I ave 2 children, he has none, and I am not really willing tor elocate. I know its hard, but is it possible? If it's meant to be , maybe he can relocate . It will work out if it's the right move. I wouldn't relocate myself and my kids while they are happy with their school and friends . Moving is hard on kids for sure . Maybe ask if his future plans would ever want to work and in your area . If neither will budge I'm afraid this may not be the relationship for you. 1
mariekatie Posted November 24, 2014 Posted November 24, 2014 I have been in a really crappy relationship for the past 4 years. We broke up 9 months ago, he treated me so horribly that I had enough. A friend of mine introduced me to her friend, someone shes known all her life. However, it was through FB, and he lives ALL the way in Ca..and I live in NYC. I figured what the hell, we will be friends. But omg, he is wonderful.. we developed deep feelings for eachother. I never have done this before. But how does a LD relationship work. I ave 2 children, he has none, and I am not really willing tor elocate. I know its hard, but is it possible? It's possible. But you need to have a talk with him on who's moving and all. But for your situation, it's better for him to move as you have 2 children. But also depends on the financial situation, which side would be better for all of you? I figured it's a good thing to talk about things earlier in the r/s before you sink into it. Spend more time in real life together to know each other better. Learn the bad habits of them and ask yourself if you can tolerate this guy in the long run. We often sink into our "fantasy" when being in a LDR as we don't interact with them in reality but instead often imagine how it would be like. It's not realistic in the long run. My advice is to have a good talk. Talk about the possibilities. If neither wants to move, it's almost impossible for this r/s to work out. 1
CaffyCat Posted December 2, 2014 Posted December 2, 2014 Anything is truly possible if you love someone. My SO and I met online. (corny I know) we were both 15. We've been together 8 years, and he proposed to me just a couple of days ago officially lol . I was just like you, I didn't even like the idea of relocation, but never say never.. I visited his home town and completely fell in love with it. I'm moving in a few days. Give it a chance. see where things go.
justwhoiam Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 A friend of mine introduced me to her friend, someone shes known all her life. However, it was through FB, and he lives ALL the way in Ca..and I live in NYC. So, you've never met him IRL, right? we developed deep feelings for eachother. Ok, but you necessarily need to meet the guy before you start thinking you can have a LDR. how does a LD relationship work. A couple is in love, but living far from each other. Meeting up usually implies flying to the one you love, and distance often means a physical separation lasting several months. You need to keep in touch with the one you love quite regularly and keep the spark alive. In my personal experience, the problem is not keeping passion alive, rather overcoming frustration, misunderstandings and enduring the time alone, when you can't share things you'd normally share with your significant other. You can try and make up for that (like going out to dinner, watching a movie together, etc.), but at times negativity takes over. So you really need to be devoted to each other for a LDR to work over time. Anyway, it's obvious that one of you should move. I know its hard, but is it possible? Yes, I think it is.
spanz1 Posted December 3, 2014 Posted December 3, 2014 a person can get a lot of emotional support, and even some sexual fulfillment, from a cyber relationship. But remember reality...it is not like really being together. So if, after many months and conversations, if you two are really clicking and seem to be soul mates...you are going to have to take it further. That means, at the least, week long trips to each other's place to see if the reality of being together is going to stick. do you have relatives you can leave the kids with for a week at a time, maybe 3 times during the year? you can fit a lot of living into a week if you both are psyched to do it! 1
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