liove Posted November 22, 2014 Posted November 22, 2014 (edited) Hello everyone, so i met this guy we dated for like 2 months and then split because i was too cold with him and he did not like that and because i wasnt showig any interest... but we were getting along very well and the sex was great but the timing wasnt good and i didnt liked him that much...he prefered to put an end to our "relationship" because i was too complicated. i was sad and never stopped thinking about him ever since asking myself if i havnt made a big mistake by ruining everything. One month of no contact and he writes to me two days ago. We met yesterday had a nice time and slept together at his place. i was seeing someone else in parallel. Everithing was going well until the morning when he tells me that he prefers to be casual, uncommited only because he wans to leave in february for several months to travel around the world and he doesnt want this to be a problem. he told me he dated other girl but he stopped seeing her because he didnt like her. and then he got in contact with me. the problem is that there is already a big problem because i really like him and i dont want a casual relatioship with him, this is not my type. Icant believe the way things changed: two months ago he hever sotpped chasing and writing me, being needy and now he just wants it casual... he even told me not to leave the guy i'm dating and let him be "the other man" (i mean come on man?? wtf?) of course i left the other one because i didnt like him... dont want to be in this situation; what should i do? maybe i shouold tell him but its too early i dont want to spoil everything. maybe go with the flow and who knows, one day that might change? please help me; only thinking about this drives me crazy... ps: i know he wont date someone else; its not that he doesnt want to be exclusive, i dont think he minds being with me only, it's that he just wants to be able to leave the country without too much fuss about it... Edited November 22, 2014 by liove
preraph Posted November 22, 2014 Posted November 22, 2014 He is about to travel around the world. This will greatly change his entire perspective. He may fall in love with some place and move there. He wants to be free while traveling to have fun with women. It's not like your relationship has been very strong up to this point anyway. So there's no way he's going to get committed right before he leaves for a big trip like this. Traveling the world changes people. It leads them in new directions. If you are smart, rather than to keep seeing him right now, you'll make a clean break and tell him to please let you know what's going on with him once he returns back to his hometown. Don't ask him to keep texting or any of that. Don't stop dating. Don't try to have a relationship while he's gone at all. Do not be his ball and chain. If you do, it's going to go sour. The only hope is to leave it entirely alone until he's back in town and then reassess. 3
Author liove Posted November 22, 2014 Author Posted November 22, 2014 he will be off traveling 3 months only and i know he will be back in his country. but nothing is sure yet about his departure and i cannot do that, just cut him off and break up; i mean 3 months it really isnt big deal... your message makes me sad because i realise i wont have other choices but i dont want to spoil everything by breakin up, because it is too early and i might look like a drama queen and who knows, maybe in a month time, things change...
KatZee Posted November 22, 2014 Posted November 22, 2014 I mean, there's really nothing you can do. He said he doesn't want a serious relationship. So for your sake, move on. Find someone that does want a real relationship. 2
preraph Posted November 22, 2014 Posted November 22, 2014 You're not breaking up because he has already told you there's no commitment. You are just not demanding him to stay in touch and not agreeing to wait for him. You aren't together in any real way now. 3
angel.eyes Posted November 23, 2014 Posted November 23, 2014 Oy vey, chica! You already know the answer. You just don't like it. Let him go and find someone else who wants what you want--a friendship and relationship. He's been totally honest with you. You want different things. The only person who will get royally hurt, should you stick around getting your hopes up and getting more emotionally invested in him when he can't and won't reciprocate, will be you. For your own sake, move on. Tons of lovely fish in the ocean. Pick another.
Tayken Posted November 23, 2014 Posted November 23, 2014 Oy vey, chica! You already know the answer. You just don't like it. Let him go and find someone else who wants what you want--a friendship and relationship. He's been totally honest with you. You want different things. The only person who will get royally hurt, should you stick around getting your hopes up and getting more emotionally invested in him when he can't and won't reciprocate, will be you. For your own sake, move on. Tons of lovely fish in the ocean. Pick another. You mean like the other guy she was seeing in parallel when she decided to go bed Mr 2 months ago? Hopefully protection was used as you don't know where his **** has been in the last 2 months 1
Author liove Posted November 24, 2014 Author Posted November 24, 2014 all this situation sucks, i am really sad ... i know he likes me and i really think that if he didnt leave for his trip, we would have been together and it'es such a shame because i think we kind of get along really well, we can talk about everythine and he listens to me it really sucks all these bad timings 1st time it was me who didnt like him and who wasnt ready for a relationship and now it's the contrary i dont even know why he even contacted me again if he knew he would leave ... maybe i can make him fall for me and keep in touch during these 3 months (that is not such a big deal, i mean is only 3 or 4 months...)
Author liove Posted November 24, 2014 Author Posted November 24, 2014 ladyluck if this is want you understood it means i really really dont know how to express myself
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