Maestro13 Posted November 22, 2014 Posted November 22, 2014 I'm one week in No Contact now and I already feel better about the situation. I unfollowed her on Facebook, put all the stuff that reminds me of her in a box and I asked my friends and family not to bring her up in conversations. But this evening I'm going to a party and I'm almost 100% sure that she'll be there as well. Now what do I do if she's there? Should I completely ignore her? Should I just smile to her? What if she comes talk to me? Any advice?
zen2475 Posted November 22, 2014 Posted November 22, 2014 Personally, I would take the high road and would be polite. You can smile and say hello, but leave it at that. I wouldn't engage in much conversation at all. If she tries to discuss anything about your relationship, that would not be the time and place to do it. Just ask her if the conversation could be deferred to another time, wish her well, and walk away.
d0nnivain Posted November 22, 2014 Posted November 22, 2014 When you bump into an EX in public you still need to be polite & act like it doesn't matter / you don't care. My technique, give them a quick tight smile from across the room but do not approach. If they come to you, again, be polite. Say hello. Give them 30 seconds to say whatever they need to say then move on. Even if you have a full drink, saying you have to go refresh your drink is a way to get out of the conversation.
me85 Posted November 22, 2014 Posted November 22, 2014 Just be normal. Don't stress about it. Don't be rude. Definitely take the high road. Be sure to smile a lot and laugh a lot.
Author Maestro13 Posted November 22, 2014 Author Posted November 22, 2014 I'd skip the party personally. I go there with a lot of my friends. I'm not going there to see her. Should I miss a fun party because she might be there? I'd feel myself more desperate when I stay home because of that.
candie13 Posted November 22, 2014 Posted November 22, 2014 You're doing this for yourself, not for her. NC is deleting her from your fb and deleting her phone number - blocking her, in more extreme cases. What you do is called LC at best. It won't work. IMO, you'll go back and forth a couple of times until you decide to put the NC rule into place. It takes a lot of guts to make this decision and even more courage to stick to it, every day... best of luck, whatever you decide to do.
ForbiddenFruit Posted November 22, 2014 Posted November 22, 2014 Out of sight is out of mind, so number one best choice would be to skip the party. but why let one girl ruin all your fun? So if you can avoid contact with her. Enjoy the party laugh and smile and genuinely have a great time, but if she walks up to you... walk away. The best thing to do in this situation is to just walk away. Because no contact means no contact. 2
Simon Phoenix Posted November 22, 2014 Posted November 22, 2014 I go there with a lot of my friends. I'm not going there to see her. Should I miss a fun party because she might be there? I'd feel myself more desperate when I stay home because of that. Because you aren't ready for this. You are trying to put out a front for her instead of just going to enjoy yourself. I doubt this will be the last party you'll ever go to in your life. 1
lolablue17 Posted November 22, 2014 Posted November 22, 2014 The casual meeting is not a big deal... The only problem i see here is what happen if she is coming with a new guy and they'll hug\hold hands\kiss in front of you... what if she's coming alone but will hook up with a guy at the party in front of your eyes? Can you handle that?
Author Maestro13 Posted November 23, 2014 Author Posted November 23, 2014 The casual meeting is not a big deal... The only problem i see here is what happen if she is coming with a new guy and they'll hug\hold hands\kiss in front of you... what if she's coming alone but will hook up with a guy at the party in front of your eyes? Can you handle that? I guess I couldn't handle that, no. I know she has a new boyfriend. But I haven't seen her / them, luckily. I am indeed still in the process of trying to forget her. Just got back. Glad she wasn't there. NC is so hard . It kills me at the moment. But I'm already feeling significantly better after 7 days of NC so let's hope that this feeling will go away even more. & Should I really delete her from Facebook? I unfollowed her but I guess that she checks my fb from time to time. So she would notice if I deleted her and chances are she contacts me about it? If I just unfollow her I don't see any of her posts either. Or do we delete/block them for other reasons?
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