Art Vandalay Posted November 21, 2014 Posted November 21, 2014 Ok so here is the quick rundown of the situation: My girlfriend of 2.5 years and I broke up August because she was going back to College (in a town only 30 minutes away) and I had just graduated and would be living and looking for work in the city. She was going to be living in her sorority house this year, which has a strict “no guys allowed in the house” policy, pair that with the fact that she has no viable means of transportation and it became pretty obvious, that our physical relationship was going to pay the price. Instead of trying and inevitably arguing about not getting to see each other enough, we both decided it would be best for us to part ways once she went back to school. We ended things on very good terms and both still loved each other. For the first month or so we were still in close contact, we hooked up a couple times, and she even called me once drunk crying telling me she loved me and hated that she couldn’t see me, that, “I was the one” and on and on... After that call however, our contact level fell off a cliff for some unknown reason. She started becoming very distant, never returning my texts, snapchats, or any kind of conversation. Over the next few weeks her sudden change in attitude got to me and I ended up being pretty pushy, trying to get her back, telling her I loved her, and it escalated to a point where about a month ago she told me I was being annoying, and that she was seeing other people. After that argument, we didn’t talk for a couple weeks. I then reached out to her to apologize and to try to mend our friendship. She called me and we talked things out, she says she has been seeing someone but that it’s, “not serious and probably wont last.” The past couple weeks we have been on good terms, talking every few days and whatnot, always very friendly. So here is my dilemma right now: She is coming home for thanksgiving break this week, and I just came into a pair of tickets for the Broncos game this upcoming Sunday (2 days from now). I would love to ask her to go with me just so we can hang out and catch up, not a date, and not under any romantic pretexts. However, I’m afraid that asking her will throw up a red flag in her mind that I’m trying to get back together with her, and I would hate to lose any of the positive ground I have made up. Should I ask her to go to the game? Should I even ask her to hang out at all this week? Thanks
NopeNah Posted November 21, 2014 Posted November 21, 2014 I wouldn't ask her to the game. Take a friend (or me) and have a good time. If you take her, your past relationship is all you'll be focused on. Plus...she's seeing someone else.
Author Art Vandalay Posted November 22, 2014 Author Posted November 22, 2014 Yeah, i was already heavily leaning towards not doing it, just wanted to see what the interwebz thought of the situation. i would also like to add that we were pretty much best friends before we started dating, thus my reason for wanting to make sure we don't totally stop seeing each other. And on another note, my BS meter runs pretty well when it comes to her, and i'm pretty sure when she said we was "seeing someone" it didn't mean she is dating anyone. i'm like 95% sure that she just hooked up with some dude a couple of times and was trying to make it a bigger deal than it was.
lolablue17 Posted November 22, 2014 Posted November 22, 2014 my experience says that you're going to be hurt many times if you still hanging out with her or even contact her. She said she seeing someone else! It doesn't matter if it's nothing or more to it. The crucial thing is that she told you that. She clearly set boundaries. If she is seeing someone, why would she mentioned it? just to hurt you? If she made it up, she's playing games with you. Why would you agree to that? I advice you to start dating yourself and only after you moved on, only then renew your friendship with her. Don't hang out with her.
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