carefreeste Posted November 20, 2014 Posted November 20, 2014 They have been friends/known each other about 6 months. Was kinda friends with him too but he wasnt out that often really tbh more nights out more than anything. Anyway nearly 2 months ago now she broke up with me stating she had fallen out of love with me and had felt it a while. Wanted to stay friends but just felt we would be happier apart than together. We had nearly 2 perfect years together , first loves, first real realtionships , no fights nothing. Helped each other through the lost of a grand parent each , been on holiday together and much more. Got on with each others familiys. all happy. All seemed perfect and I was so lucky that at the first attempt and at finally falling in love at 23 for the first time I have found the woman I wanted to be with forever. We spoke about it , being together forever , being perfect for each other , getting married , kids. Nearly since she started her new jobs , made friends with him and her other new friends things have been different. She got angry with me recently unlike never before. Biggest one was 2/3 weeks before the break up over I was meant to come down and meet her when she finished work. ( I should add her im 23 and shes 20 and we both live at home) Anyway I said I might not make it down when your off as my mam has the car so probably be another hour (She wasnt in need of a lift shes 2 mins away from her house) but she went mad via text saying she knows its not my fault but this is why she feels we are dfiting apart. I always say 1 thing and do another. Always break plans. Now you'll agree its not my fault. And so did she. So looking back I really should have been like "Wow hang on , somethings not right with her". Always I didnt pick up on the warning signs she was unhappy . Anyway she went on to say dont make promises you cant keep and I said I made the promise to see you after work beucause you were mad at me yesterday and I wanted to cheer her up. She then said she was mad because of stuff liek this and the feeling of us drifting apart. But when i asked her the day before she said nothing it was just a random bad mood . Sorry but I feel I should give that kind of a back story to the week or 2 before the break up. But even after that I arrived to her house a hour later , and we were fine, arguement didnt continue. SO to me Ive forgotten about the text arguement , and we are fine. Also a week before we broke up I let her keep money she owed me to get a guitar as she wanted to start learning. Called me amazing for believing in her , and the best boyfriend ever for a few days before getting her concert tickets she wanted. And every day saying I love you and me saying it back to her like we always did . So with my inexperience, she is still saying I LOVE YOU , so there is no problems with us . I would always just say to her its just the honeymoon phase is gone. I would say when she would say she felt we were drifiting apart. I dunno , maybe cause I felt we were going to be together forever I didnt think a thoguht of her breaking up with me would ever enter my mind so didnt take her saying stuff like that to me seriously Anyway a week after the break up. He breaks up with his girlfriend of 7 years !! Week after that I find out they kissed on a night out. I asked her about it , said they were just friends , she was drunk , nothing more. Following weeks more and more pictures creep up on social network of them together and more tweets and stuff. Now she has them as her profile picture on facebook and has acknowledged to a friend on a comment on the photo they are together . To me, while she never really sat down , face to face and said we need to talk about us, we are in trouble , I blame myself. I should have realised things were wrong. I didnt. However on the other hand I feel like she just gave up on us. Didnt give us another chance , and now appears she planned the break up to move on and go off with him . I dont hate her for it. Im not mad at her. Im too in love with her still to be mad at her. I went 3 weeks of a tough no contact with her. During those 3 weeks I wrote her a letter. Not begging or pleading. But more just talking about our memories together ,how we first met, how amazing they were and how they are too good to be fogotten about and become the forgotten past. Thought it would hit home but it didnt. Said her feelings are gone. zero. thats it. Again (when she broke up with me) she said she still wanted to remain friends. I said I dunno how I can be friends with you cause of how I would be when the next guy comes along. Said by then I would be with someone. So again she lied and still didnt ackowleodge they were together I know it seems like I should move on guys. And beleive me I am trying so very hard.I had gotten better. For instance I have stopped viewing her twitter/facebook as its just to hurtful to see what she is doing with him and retweeting stuff about relationships and ****. However I still wake up and fall alseep thinknig of her. I have thought long and hard about whether Im just hurting from first love or if I thought she was the one. And I feel she was. I cant see myself right now getting over her. Not 100% anyway. Too many things remind me over her even when she does slip out of my mind for a short while Dunno what Im asking from you guys really. As I know your just gonna say move on. Guess its all I can do really. If its meant to be she might come back some day. Just miss talking to my best friend every day. seeing her everyday. cuddling everyday. I dont want to go off and sleep with 50 girls to forget about her. I want a relationship. I want her.No one else just her. Forever. Kills me that she "appears" to be so happy , and has forgotten me , and the relationship appeared to have meant nothing these last 2 years . The 1 question I do have guys is. From what I have read on the web getting in with him after 2 weeks would be a rebound. But it seeems more planned no ? And the fact they are "best friends" - well 6 months friends anyway. Does that change it too. Does that make it more real.? Thanks for reading and sorry for making it a super long post. More than anything I just need people to talk to right now to help me through this pain
jackinthebox1 Posted November 20, 2014 Posted November 20, 2014 Its not a rebound. She premeditatedly left you for another guy. She's real young. Sending the letter was a mistake and all you can do now is move on. Its not easy but you have to get the idea of her being perfect out of your head and rememeber that she has LEFT YOU For another guy. Honestly, the way women work she was probably mentall out of that relationship months ago. She may have even been seeing that guy for a lot longer than you think. Im not saying this to hurt you but look at the facts, not what your emotions are telling you right now. They are lying to you. You say you don't hate her but you definitely shouldnt think very highly of her
Author carefreeste Posted November 20, 2014 Author Posted November 20, 2014 (edited) ]Its not a rebound. She premeditatedly left you for another guy. Yeah I know. Wishful thinking of my part. Why though if there was no real breakdown between us. Why abandon what we had. She's real young. Sending the letter was a mistake and all you can do now is move on. Its not easy but you have to get the idea of her being perfect out of your head and rememeber that she has LEFT YOU For another guy. Honestly, the way women work she was probably mentall out of that relationship months ago. She may have even been seeing that guy for a lot longer than you think. Im not saying this to hurt you but look at the facts, not what your emotions are telling you right now. They are lying to you. Again Yeah Ive told myself that , and if thats the kind of person she is Im probably better off. And was doing better until this week where I feel back to where I was. You say you don't hate her but you definitely shouldnt think very highly of her I dont either. But strong strong feelings are still there for the only woman who loved me and really cared. I will get over here with time I guess but right now Im a long way of as hard as im trying. Edited November 20, 2014 by carefreeste
Author carefreeste Posted November 20, 2014 Author Posted November 20, 2014 Looking back at texts from the week beforr she broke up with me I would have said thr blame was all me. She did say she felt we were different snd things had changed but I dunno why alarm bells weren't going off in my head
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