Update: Over a Year Later

[NvrLetUDown]

For anyone who wants to catch up on my story over a year ago, feel free to check on previous updates throughout the years and the initial post. Basically, almost a year and a half after we broke up i was pretty surprised to see her at a Halloween party this year.

 

We tried to talk a bit after we broke up but i decided it was in my best interest to stop all contact and we haven't spoken ever since. For Halloween, my friends had an event and she randomly decided to come (she lives in a different city) and something just seemed odd. Turns out she broke up with the dude that she started dating a month after we broke up. She seemed lonely and had a weird vibe around her, didn't seem to have as much fun as the rest of us.

 

Anyways, i just wanted to update how far i've come over the course of the year. LS gave me lots of relief and peace of mind knowing what i was going through can be overcome. In the past year, i have picked up a lot of new hobbies, lost about 20 lbs and recently won an intramural championship with my school league. I had the privilege to travel with my family to the Bahamas and a graduation trip to Cuba with my friends.

 

It's been one heck of a roller coaster but I can tell you that if you're willing to do it the right way (usually the hard way) you'll be just fine in the end. I find the single life is great and it was nice to get my freedom and sense of self back. In terms of my ex, i do not want to get back with someone unstable and she broke up with the other guy the same way she broke up with me. Without time to really think about anything, she just jumped from one RS to the next and i really think that time to ourselves is really important. I understand that everyone copes and moves on at a different pace but just know that there is light at the end of the tunnel.

 

Please feel free to ask me any questions regarding what i have done over the years or coping or anything in general. I wish you all the best and will stay check on LS every now and then.

[Seeker12]

Hey mate, awesome story to hear about someone who from being deep in a relationship got out, got their independence and self happiness back! Now id like your advice, considering your going to looking in retrospect whilst i perceive it in the present!

Me and my ex mutually broke up for external reasons ie family. A few months have gone by where its been an emotional rollercoaster, and even now, its day by day kind of development. She had another marriage prospect in the picture, but i think thats out of the picture now. Shes very emotional, like seriously emotional in general as a person.

 

My question is based on your bit about you guys trying to chat but you eventually went full NC. Me and my ex still care for each other at some level, its just the way the situation is we cant be together long term. That being said, we did agree recently to stay as friends and so im out of NC, and we are just communicating on a friends basis. Would you recommend that from your experience to maintain such a thing? She has serious doubts that we would have a future together because of these family issues.

[NvrLetUDown]

Hey Seeker, I'd love to chime in and give you my advice. Based on my experience, we both cared about each other at the beginning and tried to talk as friends but I do not recommend it for someone who isn't ready to accept the outcome. If you guys just broke up with family reasons it might be different but I wouldn't want to torture myself by giving myself false hope by talking to someone that will never feel that way about me. If there are doubts then she is unclear or is not willing to put that aside for you in the first place. I think getting out of NC requires you to be fully accepting that the person is not getting back with you. I do understand that in the moment, you can get blinded by the happiness you get just interacting with Her so that makes it hard. Anyways just my 2 cents !