hawx79 Posted November 16, 2014 Posted November 16, 2014 Are there girls who will never say no to you just for the sake of not hurting you? I have such a case and I think I could be dragged for months to come by her as she is not saying yes or no but I absolutely love her to death and until I get a clear no I keep persueing her till the ends.
d0nnivain Posted November 16, 2014 Posted November 16, 2014 Some people have trouble hurting other people's feelings. 2
deathandtaxes Posted November 16, 2014 Posted November 16, 2014 Why do you love this lady? What is she not saying yes or no to?
newmoon Posted November 16, 2014 Posted November 16, 2014 i have done this before, allowed someone to keep pursuing me because i just don't have the heart to really hurt a person with an outright "no" or "i don't like you" etc. BUT, i always show disinterest in other ways, so perhaps you just need to tune in to this girl more. you might actually be getting your "no," but not a verbal one.
Author hawx79 Posted November 16, 2014 Author Posted November 16, 2014 i have done this before, allowed someone to keep pursuing me because i just don't have the heart to really hurt a person with an outright "no" or "i don't like you" etc. BUT, i always show disinterest in other ways, so perhaps you just need to tune in to this girl more. you might actually be getting your "no," but not a verbal one. I said before if she didn't want to see me again she could just say no and that I wouldn't mind it. But her body language does say no!
Elle1975 Posted November 16, 2014 Posted November 16, 2014 Some people don't know how to say "no", indeed. And some people don't know when to back off, same deal.
Superman2024 Posted November 17, 2014 Posted November 17, 2014 I'm experiencing the same thing with a girl now. If someone you really like does this it can be pretty frustrating and difficult to stop pursuing. I've even left the door wide open for her to say "no" but she just won't. It's hard for me to understand this behavior since I like to be open about things.
todreaminblue Posted November 17, 2014 Posted November 17, 2014 its really hard to hurt someones feelings...but i do it.......because i dont want to waste a guys time by going out with me..... i try to let them down gently...with compassion and carefully considering their feelings...i seem to find the right words........still isnt nice to do it.....deb
deathandtaxes Posted November 17, 2014 Posted November 17, 2014 You may want to ask yourself why are you looking for a definite 'no' declaration. What do her actions say? Does she go out with you? Because if i asked a lady out and instead of a no received excuses and bs, i surely wouldn't waste my time chasing.
Author hawx79 Posted November 18, 2014 Author Posted November 18, 2014 You may want to ask yourself why are you looking for a definite 'no' declaration. What do her actions say? Does she go out with you? Because if i asked a lady out and instead of a no received excuses and bs, i surely wouldn't waste my time chasing. Her actions say no but she still goes out with me! She does make excuses but eventually she cracks and still goes out but not with a smile on her face. I told her I would understand if she said no but she doesn't. Maybe she does like me but needs space? Note she is a single mom.
deathandtaxes Posted November 18, 2014 Posted November 18, 2014 Just go out and adjust your expectations accordingly. I mean, if you enjoy her company and have a good time when you go out, then go out. I almost thought that this was going to be a lady who always point-blank rejected you for anything. But you're already going out!! Have fun, enjoy the ride, and keep your arms and feet in at all times.
Ashley S Posted November 18, 2014 Posted November 18, 2014 I am honest, but not brutally honest. I will never just tell a guy "NO", I will say other things like "Sorry I am not dating anyone right now" or "I am not interested in dating right now, but we could be friends if you want" That sort of a thing. Now, there were some guys I said "Sorry, no" to when they would ask me out, but even then I felt bad for saying that, and it only happened a few times. I don't really make myself VERY clear, but it's like I hope you get the point in what I am saying lol. It's bad, but I hope everything works out for you and this girl!
me85 Posted November 18, 2014 Posted November 18, 2014 I have been known to be brutally honest to guys before. In some cases you have to be. I had no other choice but to be at the time. Some guys think that because a girl is friends with him then she must want to sleep with him. It's absurd. Usually that's the reason guys are friends with girls so that's probably why they think we're the same way. To answer your question, yes there are girls that will keep from telling you something for the sake of not hurting your feelings. This girl probably only sees you as a friend and nothing more. She probably doesn't want to hurt your feelings by rejecting you completely. I'd be willing to bet that's the case. Sorry )= But the saying "plenty of fish in the sea" is absolutely true! So there's hope for us all! 1
Author hawx79 Posted November 19, 2014 Author Posted November 19, 2014 But its driving my crazy she doesn't dismiss me, otherwise im unable to let her go until she gives me a clear no. Is it wise to say I keep thinking of her everyday? Would that bring her over the edge of finally giving me the no?
deathandtaxes Posted November 20, 2014 Posted November 20, 2014 But its driving my crazy she doesn't dismiss me, otherwise im unable to let her go until she gives me a clear no. Is it wise to say I keep thinking of her everyday? Would that bring her over the edge of finally giving me the no? I'm still confused by what you're really asking, OP. You go out on dates. What's the problem exactly?
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