Jump to content

How did you felt when you found out your ex that your ex is dating someone new

Mizz Layta

By Mizz Layta
in Breaks and Breaking Up

 Share
While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Mizz Layta Established Member

Mizz Layta

Posted
Posted

I am still in love with my ex and few days ago he informed me that he is now seeing someone that he likes like. We live 4 hours and the distance was too much for both us despite the connection we have. We talked about moving closer but neither of us are in our point in our life we are ready for that

 

 

We have been apart couple times before and he has met other female close were he lives but no one special and they didn't mean anything to him. However, this time this girl is someone that he really likes so its the real deal.

 

 

It completely crushed me and I was wreck the night he told me. I told him that its best we go separate ways as the thought of him and another women is painful to me. I know he needs someone closer to him but it still stings. Its been few days and I feel better but I keep picturing them together and wishing if it was me. I just feel jealous of them and it still bothering me. I haven't met anyone special yet but he has :(

 

 

How can get through this? How did you felt when you found out that the person you are still in love with someone else? Did you got over it over time?

sooshi Established Member

sooshi

Posted
Posted

I mostly felt happy for him, and saddened for me because it meant for me the end of a long era (lack of friendship/involvement in each other's lives). However, I didn't find out while I was still in love in love with him. I'm not in love with him.

 

It was a hard night for me that night, but I worked through it by being loving to myself.

 

How do you think things would be different if you started dating someone first? You probably wouldn't care as much that he was dating someone, and you wouldn't be in love with him.

 

Although it hurts now, use this as a push to focus on yourself, on loving YOU and paying attention and caring for YOU, rather than on what he does and with whom. Use this as a blessing that's yearning for you to heal.

Brimstone Member

Brimstone

Posted
Posted

It sucks but personally, it pushed me over the edge of getting over her.

Really put me on the fast track to recovering. So in the end it was a good thing!

 

You'll get through even though it really hurts right now!

 

Hugs

  • Like 3
Feelbettersoon Established Member

Feelbettersoon

Posted
Posted

Only just found out so I'm crushed.

 

No going back now, not a hope. Time to move forward and take time to heal!

The thought of them together sickens me but in time we should be able to accept they were not right fr us

  • Like 1
TigerLilly78 Established Member

TigerLilly78

Posted
Posted

It hurt like hell I tried to play the "best friend" roll and bit my lip as he went on about her and gushed over their relashionship I just gave it time and space and she evetiualy dumped him. While all that was going on I met some one new the Ex then got mad and indifferent. now a days we don't talk a lot I got sick of his moping and being over all miserable about being single when he was the one who dumped me..In the end I got to be happy and he wallows in misery well least last time I talk to him..I guess in a way some tiny part of me felt validated in the fact he he hurt me so much and now the shoes on the other foot but really im at the point I just don't give a dam anymore and its a great feeling...

  • Like 1
dumbass2 Established Member

dumbass2

Posted
Posted

I know how she was when she was with me. She also did not know what she wanted and was not ready for a relationship. When I saw a photo of her with another guy at a dinner arm and arm it hit me a little, but then I just told myself, good luck to her and him. She also knew that I was going out and dating, so really, it's not that big a deal. That was when I went full NC for 3 months and she eventually contacted me again. I'm pretty sure that she still doesn't know what she wants and I wont allow myself to get sucked back in if she is still unsure. We have to move on and find someone that WANTS to be with us and not be waiting around.

Keenly Established Member

Keenly

Posted
Posted

I felt pretty ****ty about it. It made me feel pretty worthless. Plus it brought up all kinds of weird emotions because A) It was about 3 days after we had broken up and B) It was the guy she had told me had raped her when she went camping with 5 complete stranger males.

 

 

 

 

Yeah... I know.

  • Like 1
Ordinaryday Established Member

Ordinaryday

Posted
Posted

well the trick is to not find out. I refuse to speak to any of my exes, we are in 100% NC. if I bumped into them in the street and they tried to speak to me I would say right to their face "don't speak to me". if we have any mutual friends I politely ask them not to talk about her to me.

 

so even if/when they get a new bf there is no way I would ever find out about it.

  • Like 1
d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

Posted
Posted

I never found out the one guy was dating somebody else. I ran into him one day & he was wearing a wedding ring. I couldn't stop staring at it. I was crushed but that became the impetus I needed to get over him because at that point it was conclusive that we weren't getting back together.

  • Like 2
dragonfire13 Established Member

dragonfire13

Posted
Posted (edited)

I've experienced it in the past but luckily then, it was some time after our break up and I had already met someone else that I liked even more. The ex, however, was dating his best mate's ex who was a notorious man-eater at university...which definitely made it sting less.

 

I recently got out of a more recent relationship though and I'm dreading it when it does happen. (finding out hes with someone else). We've removed/blocked each other from social media but we have so many mutual friends, I reckon I'll find out one way or another.

 

I'm hoping life is on my side like it was before, and that I'll be happy with someone else first :p. But like others have said, I think if it happens some time after a break up, it might suck at first but it will be that final push to accept that things are over and move on.

 

PS Hope you're not feeling too crappy for long. When I feel down about a break up I focus on the negative aspects of the relationship or their personality. It seems the major thing for you guys was distance, so think about how hard and draining it would have been for you guys to carry on doing long distance, and how much nicer it will be when you meet someone who lives more locally.

Edited by dragonfire13
  • Like 1
Smarty Pants Established Member

Smarty Pants

Posted
Posted

Pretty upset. My ex of 5 years is pregnant and engaged 10 months after we broke up.

  • Like 1
newmoon Established Member

newmoon

Posted
Posted

the fact that you even would know if your ex is dating someone new means you didn't get far enough way. my recent ex (and all the others) might even be dead for all i know .. that is how much i know about any of them. nothing.

  • Like 1
GirlStillStrong Established Member

GirlStillStrong

Posted
Posted
I am still in love with my ex and few days ago he informed me that he is now seeing someone that he likes like. We live 4 hours and the distance was too much for both us despite the connection we have. We talked about moving closer but neither of us are in our point in our life we are ready for that

 

 

We have been apart couple times before and he has met other female close were he lives but no one special and they didn't mean anything to him. However, this time this girl is someone that he really likes so its the real deal.

 

 

It completely crushed me and I was wreck the night he told me. I told him that its best we go separate ways as the thought of him and another women is painful to me. I know he needs someone closer to him but it still stings. Its been few days and I feel better but I keep picturing them together and wishing if it was me. I just feel jealous of them and it still bothering me. I haven't met anyone special yet but he has :(

 

 

How can get through this? How did you felt when you found out that the person you are still in love with someone else? Did you got over it over time?

 

I'm so sorry you are hurting. The way I felt was crushed, heartbroken, just like you. It's so hard when your heart hurts. But the way I have dealt with heartbreak in the past is I look for the life lesson in the pain. Usually the lesson is something about myself and I allow myself to see what it is I have been doing, or did, that caused my hurt. Then I try to learn why I did those things and how not to do that again. I acknowledge and take responsibility for my own decisions. I also do my utmost to emotionally detach from the person. This sometimes means changing his name in my cell phone and email to something else, sometimes a bad name :) I also get as busy as I can doing things to keep myself occupied. Exercising is a great way to help yourself through sad times. Take care of yourself. Everything's gonna be okay.

  • Like 1
Sweetescape910 Established Member

Sweetescape910

Posted
Posted
the fact that you even would know if your ex is dating someone new means you didn't get far enough way. my recent ex (and all the others) might even be dead for all i know .. that is how much i know about any of them. nothing.

 

Just because we know if our ex is getting with someone, doesn't mean we haven't come far. We are humans with emotions; it isn't easy to block someone out for the rest of your life. I think your perspective is in a way harsh.

  • Like 1
 Share
Go to topic listing
×
×
  • Create New...