Girlfriend telling her friends about my penis size.

[Tabitha87]

I can't believe all the people who are saying to dump this girl. It seems that that's always the "solution" around here on LS. Any time a partner seeks advice on here because their SO did something that possibly hurt them, the go to answer is to BU. It's sad, really.

 

I'm having a hard time believing how trivial people can be. Seriously. It's not like she said he was horrible in bed, there no feelings/passion etc. She was asked a question on each occasion and answered them as honestly as could, & you guys say to dump her?!

[ASG]

You're so short sighted.

 

Why... yes! I am indeed near sighted. How did you guess?

 

No. I am rational, which is something that seems to be lacking in this thread. A shred of rationality.

 

She didn't say anything demeaning about his size. Hell, a 7.5 or an 8 is HUGE! So she was probably quite chuffed to be "bragging" about her bf's penis to her friend.

 

I know that when I dated a guy who was well well bellow average I skirted every size topic that came up between my girl friends and I. I didn't want to tell them he was tiny, because it worked for me, but I didn't want them to judge.

 

But he's all butt hurt for no reason at all. ESPECIALLY because SHE HAS NO IDEA he's even upset! Because he has told her NOTHING of his insecurities. And to be honest, he just needs to get over them, because being insecure about your over 7" penis is just... beyond ridiculous.

[CoolCat771]

Why... yes! I am indeed near sighted. How did you guess?

 

No. I am rational, which is something that seems to be lacking in this thread. A shred of rationality.

 

She didn't say anything demeaning about his size. Hell, a 7.5 or an 8 is HUGE! So she was probably quite chuffed to be "bragging" about her bf's penis to her friend.

 

I know that when I dated a guy who was well well bellow average I skirted every size topic that came up between my girl friends and I. I didn't want to tell them he was tiny, because it worked for me, but I didn't want them to judge.

 

But he's all butt hurt for no reason at all. ESPECIALLY because SHE HAS NO IDEA he's even upset! Because he has told her NOTHING of his insecurities. And to be honest, he just needs to get over them, because being insecure about your over 7" penis is just... beyond ridiculous.

 

 

Female equivalent:

 

 

Female: " Am I the prettiest woman you've been with?"

Male: " No, I've been with some REALLY pretty girls; prettier than you."

Female: "....................."

 

.....................

 

 

Male: "Hey guess what, me and my friends were critiquing your overall appearance at work today. I lied and said your were prettier than you actually are"

Female: "........................................"

 

That's about how it would go.

Edited November 12, 2014 by CoolCat771

[ASG]

Female equivalent:

 

 

Female: " Am I the prettiest woman you've been with?"

Male: " No, I've been with some REALLY pretty girls; prettier than you."

 

.....................

 

 

Male: "Hey guess what, me and my friends were critiquing your overall appearance at work today. I lied and said your were prettier than you actually are"

Female: "........................................"

 

Er... no. It is not comparable.

 

Let go with boob size:

 

"Are mine the biggest boobs you've ever held?"

"No, I've had bigger"

 

"Hey, guess what, your boob size came up today with my friends and I told them you were 1 cup above what you are"

"Er... yay...?"

[Donnie Darko]

What would happen if the shoes were reversed and OP told his girlfriend that all of his EX's felt much tighter than her and then went and told his mates how loose his girlfriend felt?

[ASG]

What would happen if the shoes were reversed and OP told his girlfriend that all of his EX's felt much tighter than her and then went and told his mates how loose his girlfriend felt?

 

But that's not what happened. OP asked a question that has no margin for error. I mean... if OPs gf had asked if she was the tighter he'd ever had and he'd said no, one other girl was MUCH tighter, then, yay, whatever.

 

However, she then didn't go out saying how small her BF is. Not even close. She told her friend, in no uncertain terms, that he is very big indeed. Even bigger than what he really is (because that's what she thought the measurements were).

How is that comparable to going around telling his friends how LOOSE she is?? She didn't go around telling friends how small he is... so how are we down to making that comparison???

The correct comparison would be he said to his frienD (singular, not plural) that she is really quite tight. Which... seems like a compliment from where I'm sitting.

[CoolCat771]

What would happen if the shoes were reversed and OP told his girlfriend that all of his EX's felt much tighter than her and then went and told his mates how loose his girlfriend felt?

 

 

She won't understand. She's too self-absorbed (no offense)

[lollipopspot]

So my gf of 9 months recently told me I wasn't the biggest she had after I stupidly asked her after she said it was good after we did it.

 

Why in god's name would you ask that question?

1. It doesn't matter. Let someone volunteer that if they want to tell you that you're the biggest. Biggest isn't necessarily the best.

2. You set yourself up for failure. Anything less than, "You're the biggest" was going to make you insecure. Why do that, since she's already told you you're the best?

[ASG]

She won't understand. She's too self-absorbed (no offense)

 

Because it's not even in the same realm of comparison.

 

He ASKED HER if he was the biggest. She said that no, one other guy was MASSIVE. Not that EVERY SINGLE GUY EVER was bigger.

 

She then said to a friend what she thought was his measurement, which is factually BIG. There is no margin here. 7.5 is a BIG penis. Considering average is about 5.5.

 

How is that comparable to going around telling his friends how LOOSE she is? She didn't go around telling her friend how small he is...

[CoolCat771]

Because it's not even in the same realm of comparison.

 

He ASKED HER if he was the biggest. She said that no, one other guy was MASSIVE. Not that EVERY SINGLE GUY EVER was bigger.

 

She then said to a friend what she thought was his measurement, which is factually BIG. There is no margin here. 7.5 is a BIG penis. Considering average is about 5.5.

 

How is that comparable to going around telling his friends how LOOSE she is? She didn't go around telling her friend how small he is...

 

 

She lied about his size to her friend and then told him. That's messed up. Sorry. No reason for that.

[ASG]

She lied about his size to her friend and then told him. That's messed up. Sorry. No reason for that.

 

She didn't lie. She told her friend what she thought was the measurement. 7.5. And then OP got all bent out of shape because it's not 7.5, but 7.12345 or something like that.

 

It's like someone asking me how tall my SO is and I say 6.2, instead of 6.15. It's ridiculous nitpicking. being hung up on it makes no sense at all.

 

And even if she'd said 8... what does it matter? She was purely making her GF salivate. It has nothing to do with her BF, a all. And it's not like he's a 5 and she said 8. She told her the rounded measurement (that she thought was accurate) and even if she had said 8, it would still have been a rounded measurement.

[Fondue]

Female equivalent:

 

 

Female: " Am I the prettiest woman you've been with?"

Male: " No, I've been with some REALLY pretty girls; prettier than you."

Female: "....................."

 

.....................

 

 

Male: "Hey guess what, me and my friends were critiquing your overall appearance at work today. I lied and said your were prettier than you actually are"

Female: "........................................"

 

That's about how it would go.

This is actually pretty accurate.

 

Women value their own attractiveness JUST as much as men value their own manhood.

 

These are the two things that both sexes are really uncertain and most vulnerable with. These are things that people have anxiety over.

 

So yes, this is a great example.

 

And yes, this wouldn't go over well with any female.

 

EDIT: To add, I don't think women are not as self conscious about the size of their breasts as opposed to their overall attractiveness/beauty.

[ASG]

This is actually pretty accurate.

 

Women value their own attractiveness JUST as much as men value their own manhood.

 

These are the two things that both sexes are really uncertain and most vulnerable with. These are things that people have anxiety over.

 

So yes, this is a great example.

 

And yes, this wouldn't go over well with any female.

 

EDIT: To add, I don't think women are not as self conscious about the size of their breasts as opposed to their overall attractiveness/beauty.

 

 

Problem with this is, it's subjective. Whereas size really isn't.

 

And even if we go with ths analogy, then the bit where he talks about her needs to be more specific:

"Hey, guess what, I was talking to the guy today about how you look and I told them you were a 7.5"

"Why would you say that, when we've established that I'm a 7.25?"

"I thought we'd established it was 7.5... sorry.."

 

And that would be the end of it. She didn't lie. She just said what she thought was the correct measurement (because, guess what?! We're not obsessed with penis size!), with no malice, no intent to make her BF feel worse.

 

So THIS would be the correct comparison.

[Fondue]

Problem with this is, it's subjective. Whereas size really isn't.

 

And even if we go with ths analogy, then the bit where he talks about her needs to be more specific:

"Hey, guess what, I was talking to the guy today about how you look and I told them you were a 7.5"

"Why would you say that, when we've established that I'm a 7.25?"

"I thought we'd established it was 7.5... sorry.."

 

And that would be the end of it. She didn't lie. She just said what she thought was the correct measurement (because, guess what?! We're not obsessed with penis size!), with no malice, no intent to make her BF feel worse.

 

So THIS would be the correct comparison.

I think you're not understanding what most people are upset about here. She is discussing subjects during her place of work that evidently make him uncomfortable. Then she tells him about it in a way that can be interpreted as mean spirited. To add to it, he's already self conscious about himself yet she brings it up.

 

While I understand your point and appreciate it, I can't help but disagree with you.

 

This would be like if my girlfriend one night asked me, "how pretty am I? Did you ever date a girl that was prettier?"

 

"Yah, sweetie. You're pretty. And yah, I dated a chick that was HOT!" (read: massive).

 

"Oh..."

 

Then the following day I come home and tell her, "hey, so we were discussing our significant others at work today and I told them I'm dating a girl who is above average pretty!"

 

She'd probably be like, "go **** yourself and get out!"

[ASG]

I think you're not understanding what most people are upset about here. She is discussing subjects during her place of work that evidently make him uncomfortable. Then she tells him about it in a way that can be interpreted as mean spirited. To add to it, he's already self conscious about himself yet she brings it up.

 

While I understand your point and appreciate it, I can't help but disagree with you.

 

This would be like if my girlfriend one night asked me, "how pretty am I? Did you ever date a girl that was prettier?"

 

"Yah, sweetie. You're pretty. And yah, I dated a chick that was HOT!" (read: massive).

 

"Oh..."

 

Then the following day I come home and tell her, "hey, so we were discussing our significant others at work today and I told them I'm dating a girl who is above average pretty!"

 

She'd probably be like, "go **** yourself and get out!"

 

See, I think you're attributing meaning to things that didn't have any.

 

The way I read it, it didn't seem at all like she was mean spirited about it. Also, according to the OP, he has NEVER mentioned his insecurities to him, so how would she know?? Women are not exactly mind readers, you know? We can be quite oblivious to some things, especially when they make no sense to us whatsoever and you haven't told us directly.

 

And you're assuming about your potential gf. I would shrug and drop it.

 

And yes, women do talk about sex and about their partners. Deal with it. I'm sure men do the same.

 

I just don't think this is a big deal and it certainly isn't a big enough deal to break up over. ESPECIALLY when he hasn't even TOLD her it bothered him!

 

Not to mention that if you don't want to hear an answer, do NOT ask the question.

[CoolCat771]

 

Then the following day I come home and tell her, "hey, so we were discussing our significant others at work today and I told them I'm dating a girl who is above average pretty!"

 

 

"But she isn't THAAAT pretty..."

[ASG]

"But she isn't THAAAT pretty..."

 

What?!?! How do you get THAT from saying he's like a quarter of an inch bigger than he actually is??? How does that mean she was out there telling THE WHOLE WORLD how small he is?!?

 

What!?!?! I despair sometimes...

 

In all honestly, if we're comparing like for like here, he would have to have said (and meant) WAY above average (when it was supposed to be SOMEWHAT above average).

 

It is STILL NOT demeaning, no matter how you slice it. It wasn't an insult. It wasn't meant as one and I don't even understand how it could be construed as one...

[NJ123]

She was disrespectful and you are a doormat.

 

You are both allowing this kind of aggressive behavior. omg! Break up with her, right now and seek a counselor, please!!:sick:

 

Do you ever have anything nice to say? This is the third disrespectful comment I've seen you make in the past 2 days.

[ScreaminEagle]

I would not ask questions you do not want to hear the answers to. Some women will be brutally honest and hurt your feelings, and some will side step the question because they know the damaging effects it can have on your ego and self esteem.

 

I do think it is quite immature to bring the bedroom to work. I do not think she did it to hurt your feelings. You just happened to ask the wrong question. The equivalent is her asking if she had the best body out of all your former girlfriends, you could either say yes absolutely but in reality that might not be true.

[isisisweeping]

Because it's not even in the same realm of comparison.

 

He ASKED HER if he was the biggest. She said that no, one other guy was MASSIVE. Not that EVERY SINGLE GUY EVER was bigger.

 

She then said to a friend what she thought was his measurement, which is factually BIG. There is no margin here. 7.5 is a BIG penis. Considering average is about 5.5.

 

How is that comparable to going around telling his friends how LOOSE she is? She didn't go around telling her friend how small he is...

 

No joke. I don't lie. If my current asked if he was the biggest that would be a no

 

But I mean, I think his is the best. It's like the perfect fit for me; other guy was too big.

But he wouldn't ask and wouldn't get bent out of shape over a question he asked.

 

And not work but I have bragged about him to my best friends. Because it is awesome and perfect. *shrug*

 

At Over 7" that sounds like a brag too. She certainly wasn't complaining.

[BeholdtheMan]

Cock size is not the measure of a man. I'm 6 inches, as average as it gets and I don't give a sh*t if some girl tells me she's been with a 10 inch monster.

 

My confidence isn't based on my penis size. My confidence is based on my choice to live with self-respect and dignity, something to which every single person is entitled. Confidence comes from within, not from without. Being affected by something another person says about your schlong is weak...very weak. You should be mentally stronger than that.

[IronZ]

lol an ex of mine used to exaggerate my size to her friends all the time. I don't know why.. I'm not small either so it didn't matter to me. I'd say it's akin to men exaggerating a woman's breast size to their buddies. They're doing it to show off.

[BeholdtheMan]

lol an ex of mine used to exaggerate my size to her friends all the time. I don't know why.. I'm not small either so it didn't matter to me. I'd say it's akin to men exaggerating a woman's breast size to their buddies. They're doing it to show off.

 

What's funny about this thread if true is that the guy who's upset has a penis "a shade over 7 inches" and he's upset at an exaggeration of "7.5 inches [a little bit more than his actual length] to 8 inches"

 

It boggles the mind.

[Snaggletooth]

The thing is... From what I understood from the OP, the GF has NO IDEA he is sensitive about the issue.

HE asked HER if he was the BIGGEST she'd ever had. She said NO! Cue his insecurity! Of which he said NOTHING to her. And I mean... if you're going to ask, you better be sure you want to hear the answer!

 

And then, the next day or whatever, she comes home and lightly tells him that, guess what? Someone asked her what his size was! (Which... yeah, can be a topic of conversation!) And she said 8 or 7,5 or whatever.

And he got all hung up on her "lying", because it's not 7,5, it's 7,23455 or whatever and OMG does this mean she thinks I'm tiny?!?!

 

Grow up OP. And you people telling him to dump her over this... grow up as well! This is nothing! Means nothing. Should amount to nothing. Drop in the proverbial ocean.

 

Why make a big deal??

 

It's about trust and respect. When in a relationship you are trusted with information that is private; physical features, sex, fears, hopes, dreams, worries, history, health issues etc. Many may be gossips and blabbermouths but their partners don't have to like it nor tolerate it. The ones who need to grow up are those who can't respect the privacy of others.

 

 

Personally, my concern wouldn't be that the girl lied, it would be that she didn't reply "None of your business" and instead chose to divulge personal information she had been trusted with. If I'm in a relationship my partner's trust and privacy is respected. That continues long after any break up and what they shared with me is taken to the grave. I expect the same in return and if someone can't do that, they are no longer trusted.

[Friskyone4u]

Ask your girlfriend how she would like it if you started having discussions with your friends about how tight or loose her vagina is. Or how she gives head.

On second thought maybe you better not do that. She sounds so stupid and immature that she might take it as a compliment.

She obviously has no respect for you. Ornherself