katiemiller Posted November 10, 2014 Posted November 10, 2014 My ex of a year broke up with me out of the blue one day, saying he was being selfish and that he didn't want to be in a relationship anymore; that I always gave 100% and it wasn't fair to me. I tried talking to him after, but he went completely off the grid and refused to even look in my direction, saying that he needed to stop talking to me, so I could move on. He didn't do anything wrong, yet 6 months later I completely hate him, yet would get back together with him if he asked. I don't cry over him anymore, but the idea of him still gives me butterflies. I was getting better and then I saw him about a month ago and we had a civil conversation. Everything I felt for him came back, even though I wanted to punch him at the same time. Ever since then, I feel like I am almost back at step 1. From mutual friends, I believe he is talking to someone else. It kills me because he was the one who wanted to be single and he has now found someone before me, without really even trying (this girl is just a friend of a friend). I tried so hard to be a wonderful girlfriend to him and now this girl is getting everything I wanted. I have been on multiple dates, but I just can't connect. My friends think I am ridiculous for still getting upset. I am just scared that I am not going to find someone who can finally push my ex out of my head. Any advice?
polaske93 Posted November 10, 2014 Posted November 10, 2014 Have you talked to him at all besides the one chance encounter? Maybe try talking to him and see where he is at. If things didn't end badly between you two there's always a future. Sounds like you loved him deeply
Author katiemiller Posted November 10, 2014 Author Posted November 10, 2014 I haven't spoken with him. We live in the same apartment complex so I'll see him drive by now and then but that's about it. I keep hoping that one day he'll wake up and want me back, but I'm positive he won't. Plus, I know we weren't right for each other. He'll be 100% faithful, but he'll never put 100% effort into a relationship and I know that eventually I want to get married and have kids. I guess I just am still missing closure which I know I'll never get or my egos bruised.
lemonsugar Posted November 10, 2014 Posted November 10, 2014 Just take it a day at a time Also keep thinking he will never come bak but shutting down the hope it will be easier. Find mr right dont settle for mr okay
preraph Posted November 10, 2014 Posted November 10, 2014 He broke up not because of you but because he wasn't finished exploring and dating around. I know it's hard for you, but at least her broke up and didn't just go cheating on you that you know of (maybe he did, I don't know). Anyway, he cut you loose instead of trying to have his cake and eat it to. All you can do is try to stay busy with friends or travel or anything that cheers you up and don't turn down any dates. It could be another 10 years before he's finished playing the field; it could be never; he could find who he thinks is "the one" tomorrow. You can't live your life waiting.
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