Iruinedeverything Posted November 10, 2014 Posted November 10, 2014 (edited) after a grueling week of doing everything wrong like begging & crying for him back which led to him being really angry at me for continuously calling & him asking to be left alone...my ex invited me to sleep over for a weekend (i know its weird..the flip flop was shocking to me)& i agreed, we finally met up...i assume it was cause he wanted to have sex even though he had called me crazy for a week straight. We had a "closure session"...prior to this i hadn't been able to go a day without calling & texting till he answered, after the weekend i was finally able to go full NC. We cried together and said we could be friends eventually. He broke up with me & knows i want to be with him...he says not a chance in hell due to my insecurities & he thinks we can be best friends in the future but nothing more (i know -.-) in a stark contrast he also proposed to continue having a sexually exclusive relationship, but i told him i couldnt do it. last things last he said he'd keep checking up on me. Its only been a week NC...but im pretty sure he will text me before the recommended 30-60 days are up, we agreed to check in on each other, if i just ignore him when he does...wont he just assume im playing stupid games to get him back?... Its only been a week but i already feel 10x better...my feelings are fading...there is something about knowing without a doubt a man doesnt want you (he explicitly said he isnt inlove anymore or want me romantically) that makes it easier...i actually do think we can be friends in the future though at the moment i want more. just asking if i should still be NC for the 30 days if i already told him he could check in.. if i ignore and contact him after a month..wouldnt he be turned off further from any sort of relationship platonic or otherwise?...it'd be like he gave me an olive branch of friendship when i want more & i turned it down...why am i coming around now? or am i wrong? Edited November 10, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Reels Posted November 10, 2014 Posted November 10, 2014 NC is not needed if there is some possibility of getting together again, without any conflicts. If there is no possibility, being friends is just good. NC is mostly needed if you are having conflicts.
BC1980 Posted November 10, 2014 Posted November 10, 2014 There's obviously no chance at reconciliation here because he does not respect you. He called you crazy, said you were insecure, and proposed a f@ck buddy type relationship. I would be so hurt and disgusted if someone, especially a recent ex I still loved, wanted a so called sexually exclusive relationship with me. How demeaning. He's using your insecurities to try to get sex and only wants to "check up on you" to get sex. He's hoping you will cave later on. Absolutely NC forever on this guy. He obviously thinks very little of you, so I don't know how you could stand to face him again.
Author Iruinedeverything Posted November 10, 2014 Author Posted November 10, 2014 (edited) There's obviously no chance at reconciliation here because he does not respect you. He called you crazy, said you were insecure, and proposed a f@ck buddy type relationship. I would be so hurt and disgusted if someone, especially a recent ex I still loved, wanted a so called sexually exclusive relationship with me. How demeaning. He's using your insecurities to try to get sex and only wants to "check up on you" to get sex. He's hoping you will cave later on. Absolutely NC forever on this guy. He obviously thinks very little of you, so I don't know how you could stand to face him again. to be completely honest i was extremely insecure throughout the relationship accusing him of things with no proof because of previous relationships which was why he chose to end it...he called me crazy because I called his phone everyday for a week after we broke up & i'd call as many times as it would take for him to answer...which could easily go double digits (which is a little crazy) & though the sexual relationship is the part i'd agree with you on I'm sure his respect dwindled the second i started begging him back... he was my friend before all this..& break ups bring out the worst in people so i can forgive him for this...reconciliation looks bleak but a friendship doesnt...he cried and apologized for using my emotions to try and get sex...but it seemed a little rehearsed i assume he was feeling me out to see if i was actually okay with that & prepared his little crying speech for if I was appauled...you may be right he may be hoping i'd want sex down the road & he knows i rather sleep with someone old than someone new but i told him if ever i did want to have sex that badly it wouldn't be him i'd go back to because of this very situation...so even if he tries he'll fail..i have male friends who want to have sex with me & not for lack of respect. what i'll take away from this though..is to ignore him during NC...because of how he acted & if he isnt open to a friendship after NC because i chose to ignore...i'll remember how he treated me during the break up Edited November 10, 2014 by Iruinedeverything
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