hildagnome Posted November 9, 2014 Posted November 9, 2014 So, I have a male friend I really liked who is acting so weirdly I don't know what to make of it. I don't know if he is some kind of extra complicated guy or is hedging his bets. Like I said I liked him but I'm shy and not flirty at all so there is a strong chance I gave no signals I was interested, although I did initiate most of our text conversations. He too is shy and I always thought he wasn't making a move because he was afraid of rejection. Once when we were hanging out (8 months after knowing each other) he mentioned he had an internet fling (whatever that is) with this woman he met randomly. It ended like a week after and it was internet based so I wasn't too upset. I still liked him but I also decided if he was telling me about his love life he wasn't interested so I pulled back a tiny bit in terms of initiating most of the texts. We did hang out a LOT after that and initiating contact was more him now. Then one day with no warning while we're about to hang out he texts to say he is introducing me to his girlfriend of 4 weeks who he is also taking a trip with. When we met he was really awkward with me - barely met my eyes before he warmed up. Gf was nice btw but bland. This awkward attitude got me to thinking he knew all along that I liked him but wanted to be friends only. Keeping this in mind I stopped initiating contact as this was something I needed to do for me. Got a few texts which I barely responded to, including one inviting me out. a few weeks later I get a message 'broke up with S'. At this point I don't care. I'm kind of over him. He has now started texting all the time. Which he didn't use to do. Mainly ridiculous things like, 'I painted my house' followed by an equally ridiculous question so I answer him. All my replies have been cool and cutting the conversation short but he persists in these ridiculous messages that say nothing. He's not stupid so knows I'm cutting him short. So why does he keep it up? Does he a) really, really want to remain / revert to being close friends and is hanging in there for me to be cool with the friends thing b) think of me as a backup now that there is no other option c) realise he liked me and I liked him and he messed up d) liked me all along, was waiting for the signal / too scared, another girl came along and made a play for him ( I'm pretty sure she did from what he said to me) and he just went with it.
todreaminblue Posted November 9, 2014 Posted November 9, 2014 could be any number of reasons why he is trying to maintain contact with you, i think the only way to avoid confusion is to ask him what he wants from you.....be open and honest with him and hopefully he will be with you..best wishes.......deb
Snaggletooth Posted November 9, 2014 Posted November 9, 2014 He's probably missing his friend and wondering why she is barely taking to him. He'll quit on the friendship himself soon enough. If you want him to stop contacting you then tell him and stop replying. If you want to know his intentions, ask him.
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