Rainah Posted November 9, 2014 Posted November 9, 2014 (edited) So I thought I would post in this forum since there seems to be more community on here who could help me out I'm going to keep it short and sweet, we broke up in April-ish 2014. He moved on, found a new girlfriend, had her move in, replaced the car me and him had together, got 3 cats for her, doing all her can to make her feel at home and happy, he never told me he had a girlfriend. I cut contact with him after I found out he was living with someone, he never told me he even had a girlfriend, he had plenty of opportunity since we were still on talking grounds with each other at the time he must have had a girlfriend. He was mad at me asking why I deleted him off of everything and I told him since he has a new girlfriend I am unable to remain friends with him because it hurts so I need space and time to heal. On the 27th October he wrote "just wanted to say hi" which I did not respond to. Yesterday and today he wrote to me again and said something along the lines of he misses me wanted to see how I am doing and then he said he is not doing too well. I had suspicions that he was keeping an eye on my facebook so I put that I was in a relationship, today I went on facebook and received these messages from him, I know I shouldn't have responded but I felt so mad to know he has a girlfriend who he is living with and he keeps trying to contact me, why?! It hurts and now I am at square one again with no contact, I feel the heartbreak again. He wrote: ouch, you just been waiting to be in a relationship? you moved on fast im just courous if you will be honest about who. is it I wrote back saying: I'm not with anyone it was a test to see if you still look at my profile and my suspicions was correct, I have no idea why you are still trying to get ahold of me when you have happily moved on Even if I was to have been in a new relationship I'm curious as to what it would be of concern to you? Like I said you have happily moved on and I am sure she would not appreciate you contacting me about your hurt of me moving on, if I was in her shoes I would be extremely mad if I found out you were contacting your ex whilst with me, take care. Edited November 9, 2014 by Rainah
sooshi Posted November 9, 2014 Posted November 9, 2014 Rainah, Breakups hurt. Having someone you love be a big part of your life and then having that person not be (much) a part of your life anymore hurts. Once the breakup took place, he was allowed to date others and have his own romantic relationship... and to do so without telling you about it. How do you think that him telling you about it would make things any different? Changing your relationship status for the reason you did, and the message you sent him, as well as his original message in response to the relationship status change were all forms of manipulation. You both felt hurt and you both wanted some validation. You both wanted the other person to confirm that even though one moved on quickly, that the other person still deemed them to be important. He doesn't want you to tell him about your feeling hurt about him moving on. It sounds like he may want you in his life, but not in any way that resembles your previous romantic relationship; if he wants something with you, it's a platonic friendship.
JoeFallkon Posted November 9, 2014 Posted November 9, 2014 Obviously he hasnt moved on, he still misses you, you shouldnt have told him u werent with anyone. He probably feels relieved now that you answered back and that you have no boyfriend. I did the same thing. My ex used to text short texts, so i got tired of it, and told her that i had someone new and that she knew i wouldnt cheat on that new person so i told her to leave me alone. I still have no one but she talked to an uncle and he asked me who i was with, and i still dont talk to her. She has messaged me a few times, last time 2 days ago wishin me a happy birth day. I do miss her so much, but i need to move on. Unless she shows me change, which i doubt. (she is into drugs and all that sht) i dont want that in my life, tried so hard to help her but it only got me down with her and funny thing is that shes the one that dumped me. You should just keep ignoring him, i know its soo hard, but if he lives with someone already, he is just gonna play with your and her feelings. Let time go by and maybe he ll realize he made a mistake and get rid of her to try n get back with you. Only then maybe you can reply if you still want something to do with him.
Author Rainah Posted November 10, 2014 Author Posted November 10, 2014 I think he just wanted someone to talk to, I should have read the messages here first before I replied again to him, I replied and blocked him. From now on if he does find a way to message me I will ignore. It hurts HimOne i didnt move on happily i was forced to try to be happy. Second she is in the hospital for trying to kill herself 3 times 9:10pm MeNo one put a gun to your head and told you make the next girl you see move in with you, happiness comes in different ways by doing different things rather than jumping from relationship to relationship when your not ready to do so. I'm sorry to hear she is hospital, hope she gets better soon, in this situation you should be attending her needs not contacting me, your ex girlfriend. Take care hope it all works out for you.
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