writergal Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 LOL My guy was/is still bad with texting, so I give this one a few more dates to call the ending. If I posted about my guy at the 4th date, when he didn't even kiss me, everyone would have told me to kick him to the curb! What? 5 dates and no kiss? He's gay! He's not into you. What? No calling? No texting? He's stupid, not interested, rude... It took mine 2 months to catch feelings, so I give them a bit of time and sit tight, take notes and don't sabotage, throw tantrums or anything of the sort. I mean...that's what I did. Although I did pay Jess McCann a couple of times to get advice at those early days Instead of posting here. You waited 2 months? You are a saint. I'm going to call you Saint BlueEyeL and have you cannonized in the Hall of Hearts (located at the Hallmark Headquarters). Wow! You have the patience of a tortoise who's trying to cross the road to get to the other side where the wetlands are, without getting run over. I probably would have thrown him out after slipping him the phone number to a support group for confused men. ha, ha! Probably WHY I'm still single. I won't be writing down his answers for an Rx of good communication etiquette. I will be writing down his answers to post here for all you girls to read. Hooray! I'll need his response for my character dialogue. I'm going to write a story about this and call him Dr. Strange-Text! (haha) There's a snowstorm happening outside my window so I'm trapped and relegated to post funny comments in threads here until the imminent threat of car towing once Emergency Plowing commences. Ha, ha! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PumpkinLumpkin Posted November 10, 2014 Author Share Posted November 10, 2014 Can you set up that date for tomorrow, or Wed at the latest? Too hard to wait! What are we going to discuss if the date is on Friday? Or never? No. I don't want to initiate a date with him, esp. after he pulled that stunt. That, my dear, would be rewarding bad behaviour! He's going to have to initiate the fifth date for any type of redemption, in my eyes. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Divasu Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 I won't be writing down his answers for an Rx of good communication etiquette. Well, yours isn't exactly perfect either. I mean, you could be discussing this directly with him. Just sayin. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PumpkinLumpkin Posted November 10, 2014 Author Share Posted November 10, 2014 Well, yours isn't exactly perfect either. I mean, you could be discussing this directly with him. Just sayin. You mean actually put on makeup and Spanx, get in the car, actually talk face-to-face? Nah, I'd rather belly-ache to you random internet strangers in my PJs. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PumpkinLumpkin Posted November 10, 2014 Author Share Posted November 10, 2014 I do not initiate the fifth date. No way. Right? Are you all with me? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Divasu Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 You mean actually put on makeup and Spanx, get in the car, actually talk face-to-face? Nah, I'd rather belly-ache to you random internet strangers in my PJs. Suit yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
Author PumpkinLumpkin Posted November 10, 2014 Author Share Posted November 10, 2014 I'm so sad. I thought dating a 56 year old would be a different experience than men in their 30s/40s. Turns out it's the same old shieeeete. Link to post Share on other sites
BlueIris Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 Or calm down and don’t let your imagination run away with you. I’ve broken up with men who had built up major constructs in their minds about what every thing I did or said REALLY meant, and every damn time it was all negative conclusions about my having nefarious motives or game-playing. I hadn’t been thinking any of the things they’d been concluding, but it was revealing to see how negatively they viewed me, or women, or people, or something. Bottom line was we just didn’t think and operate the same way and they were quick to smell trouble while I was blissfully bumping along thinking everything was fine. For instance, to me, 4 dates in two weeks is A LOT! I wouldn’t be expecting to see each other again for a week or two, maybe longer, and if he wasn't calling I'd assume that we both needed a breather. So, outliers like us do exist. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
writergal Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 I do not initiate the fifth date. No way. Right? Are you all with me? Yes, I'm with you. *Cheering* "No 5th date!! Don't in-it-iate! Goooo Pumpkin!" Heh heh! I'd jump up and do an air-kick but I'm 43 and sitting on my bed with my cat and laptop. So yeah, no air kick. Waving my hands in the air, waving them like...jazz hands. So you got jazz hands! Woo! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PumpkinLumpkin Posted November 10, 2014 Author Share Posted November 10, 2014 Or calm down and don’t let your imagination run away with you. I’ve broken up with men who had built up major constructs in their minds about what every thing I did or said REALLY meant, and every damn time it was all negative conclusions about my having nefarious motives or game-playing. I hadn’t been thinking any of the things they’d been concluding, but it was revealing to see how negatively they viewed me, or women, or people, or something. Bottom line was we just didn’t think and operate the same way and they were quick to smell trouble while I was blissfully bumping along thinking everything was fine. For instance, to me, 4 dates in two weeks is A LOT! I wouldn’t be expecting to see each other again for a week or two, maybe longer, and if he wasn't calling I'd assume that we both needed a breather. So, outliers like us do exist. I love this post. I do have a runaway imagination. And I've had the same done to me...men questioning my every move and it was annoying! Thanks for the post. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PumpkinLumpkin Posted November 10, 2014 Author Share Posted November 10, 2014 Yes, I'm with you. *Cheering* "No 5th date!! Don't in-it-iate! Goooo Pumpkin!" Heh heh! I'd jump up and do an air-kick but I'm 43 and sitting on my bed with my cat and laptop. So yeah, no air kick. Waving my hands in the air, waving them like...jazz hands. So you got jazz hands! Woo! You made me laugh so hard with this! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
writergal Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 I'm so sad. I thought dating a 56 year old would be a different experience than men in their 30s/40s. Turns out it's the same old shieeeete. Some men never change unfortuantely. I mean, I HOPE I'm wrong about Dr. Strange-Text. I hope for your sake. Don't chase him. Chase a kite, a 3 year old child, a cat. But never chase a man...unless he stole your purse and you're taller than him and have street-fighting training. Men age more like cheese than wine; they stink more and can be hard to digest. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PumpkinLumpkin Posted November 10, 2014 Author Share Posted November 10, 2014 some men never change unfortuantely. I mean, i hope i'm wrong about dr. Strange-text. I hope for your sake. Don't chase him. Chase a kite, a 3 year old child, a cat. But never chase a man...unless he stole your purse and you're taller than him and have street-fighting training. Men age more like cheese than wine; they stink more and can be hard to digest. omg i am dying!!!!! :d:d:d:d:d:d 2 Link to post Share on other sites
BluEyeL Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 You waited 2 months? You are a saint. I'm going to call you Saint BlueEyeL and have you cannonized in the Hall of Hearts (located at the Hallmark Headquarters). Wow! You have the patience of a tortoise who's trying to cross the road to get to the other side where the wetlands are, without getting run over. I probably would have thrown him out after slipping him the phone number to a support group for confused men. ha, ha! Probably WHY I'm still single. :lmao: I threw away a few before him, including that doctor (he deserved it) , and I decided to go another route and give people time to catch feelings. I waited 7 dates for a kiss, two months for a text. And it was a funny story with that text....he sent it to.... my son :laugh: Yeah, that's how bad he is. Apparently he clicked on my email address and my son's phone number is attached to that email address because he set up stuff on my account. And my son didn't reply to the text for 14 h. So he sent another one... and my son replied with: "very nice, much wow!":lmao: fortunately, it wasn't a dick pic LOL 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PumpkinLumpkin Posted November 10, 2014 Author Share Posted November 10, 2014 :lmao: I threw away a few before him, including that doctor (he deserved it) , and I decided to go another route and give people time to catch feelings. I waited 7 dates for a kiss, two months for a text. And it was a funny story with that text....he sent it to.... my son :laugh: Yeah, that's how bad he is. Apparently he clicked on my email address and my son's phone number is attached to that email address because he set up stuff on my account. And my son didn't reply to the text for 14 h. So he sent another one... and my son replied with: "very nice, much wow!":lmao: OMG I hope for your son's sake it wasn't an R-rated text! Seven dates for a kiss?? WTH?? Did he need a road map??? Link to post Share on other sites
writergal Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 :lmao: I threw away a few before him, including that doctor (he deserved it) , and I decided to go another route and give people time to catch feelings. I waited 7 dates for a kiss, two months for a text. And it was a funny story with that text....he sent it to.... my son :laugh: Yeah, that's how bad he is. Apparently he clicked on my email address and my son's phone number is attached to that email address because he set up stuff on my account. And my son didn't reply to the text for 14 h. So he sent another one... and my son replied with: "very nice, much wow!":lmao: fortunately, it wasn't a dick pic LOL He sent his first steamy text to your son by accident?? Oh that is FUNNY!! I bet your son was like, "Mooom some weird guy is texting me naughty thoughts!" 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BluEyeL Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 OMG I hope for your son's sake it wasn't an R-rated text! Seven dates for a kiss?? WTH?? Did he need a road map??? yeah. Indeed, he showed me a comic exactly on that roadmap thing. It was a picture from Florida:p Link to post Share on other sites
BluEyeL Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 He sent his first steamy text to your son by accident?? Oh that is FUNNY!! I bet your son was like, "Mooom some weird guy is texting me naughty thoughts!" I know...when my son finally showed me, we were both rolling on the floor laughing thinking of what the guy thought when he got a answer from me saying "very nice. much wow!":lmao: 2 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 When I was dating I was the one in control. If they lacked effort I ditched them. Then again there was no such thing as texting, it was all done face to face. Texting can lead to bread crumbs.... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
writergal Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 I know...when my son finally showed me, we were both rolling on the floor laughing thinking of what the guy thought when he got a answer from me saying "very nice. much wow!":lmao: That's hilarious! Ha, ha, ha!! That reminds me of when my niece was 9. My boyfriend at the time texted me while I was babysitting her. She grabbed my phone away from me and texted him back, "Stop your dirty talk!" lol! I had to call him to explain that it wasn't me who texted him. I liked his dirty talk! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
writergal Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 When I was dating I was the one in control. If they lacked effort I ditched them. Then again there was no such thing as texting, it was all done face to face. Texting can lead to bread crumbs.... Darn right texting can lead to breadcrumbs. It's like that's the sole purpose for texting when you first communicate with someone. That's why I loved growing up without voicemail in high school. The boys were forced to leave messages with one of my parents to tell me they called. And the in college, the answering machine with cassette tape...still a better option than texting. Remember this scene from the movie ? Ha, ha! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PumpkinLumpkin Posted November 10, 2014 Author Share Posted November 10, 2014 (edited) When I was dating I was the one in control. If they lacked effort I ditched them. Then again there was no such thing as texting, it was all done face to face. Texting can lead to bread crumbs.... Well, I'm trying to determine if the long response time is lack of effort or lack of electronic awareness. Or age 56. Or all three. Edited November 10, 2014 by PumpkinLumpkin Link to post Share on other sites
BlueIris Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 Well, I'm trying to determine if the long response time is lack of effort or lack of electronic awareness. You can't tell. It's only speculation since you don't know him yet. Could be LOTS of things. Generally if you like someone so far, choose the default setting that he is not bad and might just be a doofus or.. something. Heaven knows. But I'm laughing like a lunatic here at the stories and that Swingers clip is a riot- now, who hasn't lived that? Dating can just be layers and layers of doofusness and you just gotta laugh. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author PumpkinLumpkin Posted November 10, 2014 Author Share Posted November 10, 2014 You can't tell. It's only speculation since you don't know him yet. Could be LOTS of things. Generally if you like someone so far, choose the default setting that he is not bad and might just be a doofus or.. something. Heaven knows. But I'm laughing like a lunatic here at the stories and that Swingers clip is a riot- now, who hasn't lived that? Dating can just be layers and layers of doofusness and you just gotta laugh. Isn't dating funny tho? That's why I'm forced to throw my hands up in the air and just say whatever...life it soo short! Whatever the reason he's being a doofus, we now have 16 pages on some 56 year old doctor's rudeness when he probably saved the lives of hundreds of people over his career. The big picture. I don't care anymore. He's older, more experienced. Maybe he's slowing it down a notch. I have no idea. The best thing to do is live in the moment and enjoy my life. p.s. I still won't be initiating tho. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 This might be a false equivalency, but this is how I view abnormally long response times. It's almost like showing up late for functions. Responding 24-plus hours later is kinda saying "my time is more valuable than your time. You can wait." That's how I view it. Maybe he doesn't see it that way, but certainly at the beginning stages when you're supposed to be on your best behaviour, you'd care about the impression you're making. This is making me sad. I get what you're saying, but that only applies if you both of you are mature people with jobs and not much time on your hand. Unfortunately, most people get plagued with texters who have nothing better to do all day but sit around and text and want to text back and forth all day because they're do-nothings. So anyone who's been through that knows better than to get it started by replying promptly to every text. It can too easily spiral out of control and it's not good for face to face conversation either. Busy people don't stop what they're doing to placate someone socially. They have obligations and mean to be diligent about them. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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