rov Posted November 7, 2014 Posted November 7, 2014 Hi everyone, yesterday I dated a girl I met in my university 8 years ago. The other day she like some photos on me on Facebook and I decided to talk to her, we started to chat and she was very kind. So after some days I told her to meet up and we ended having dinner yesterday. I had a very good time with her and she asked me if I had a girlfriend and how many exes I had, that was very weird because no girl Ive ever dated asked that, then she told me that she broke up 6 months ago from a relationship that lasted 11 years. We had a great time, and at the end I texted her that I had a good time and that if she wanted to go to the movies next week, she told me that she also had a great time and told me that of course she wants to go to the movies next week with me. My question is: Is she interested in me or will I end up as a rebound for her?
Haerts Posted November 7, 2014 Posted November 7, 2014 She's into you! She liked your pictures, when you talked to her she was kind and accepted your invitation and even better: she also said she had a great time and wants to see you again. What more do you need? Of course, you never know whether she already got over her ex or not, but she was interested on having dinner with you and wanna go out with you again, so I would take that as hints she's interested. Just go easygoing, take things slowly and eventually you'll find out whether she's just interested on going out with you because she likes that or because she likes you.
Jules Dash Posted November 8, 2014 Posted November 8, 2014 Only 6 months from an 11 year relationship? Upu arw almost certainly in a rebound situation but that is ok. As long as you are aware, it is ok. If we are too picky, we won't go out on many dates. You can still have a good experience as long as you maintain awareness.
acrosstheuniverse Posted November 8, 2014 Posted November 8, 2014 Six months is quite a long time, especially if they weren't married. I would trust her on this that she knows what she is capable of right now, and try not to get too invested but don't classify yourself as a 'rebound' already. She's clearly interested so go for it.
irc333 Posted November 8, 2014 Posted November 8, 2014 Six months is quite a long time, especially if they weren't married. I would trust her on this that she knows what she is capable of right now, and try not to get too invested but don't classify yourself as a 'rebound' already. She's clearly interested so go for it. Yeah, if she wasn't married, 6 months is more than enough time to have gotten over that. If it was that long, chances are she lost interest in previous manduring the last remaining years of that relationship.
acrosstheuniverse Posted November 8, 2014 Posted November 8, 2014 Yeah, if she wasn't married, 6 months is more than enough time to have gotten over that. If it was that long, chances are she lost interest in previous manduring the last remaining years of that relationship. I don't really get this idea that relationships over a certain length always take longer to get over than relationships under that length of time, I think it's more about what you shared together. If you were living together, had mutual friends etc. then sure, a year's relationship can be less of a loss than a marriage of 30 years with kids but other than extremes like that, it's such a grey area. I had a four year relationship end, kinda mutually drifted to a conclusion in a way, and I was ready to date pretty much immediately. I had a two year relationship end in a traumatic way, I got dumped with no forewarning, and that took me much longer to get over (maybe five/six months) to be ready to date again. I met my current boyfriend 2.5 months after my last relationship ended and even though that hurt me, I was ready to date because I had gone no contact. There are no hard and fast rules when it comes to moving on from a relationship, whatsoever. Often super long relationships have a longer period of time at the end where both parties realise it's dying, but keep up the motions because so much time has been invested. Many end up separating feeling like nothing but friends anyway.
irc333 Posted November 8, 2014 Posted November 8, 2014 Yeah, I don't get it either. They say "Forever X amount of years you were married, it takes X amount of years to get over your ex." I don't really get this idea that relationships over a certain length always take longer to get over than relationships under that length of time, I think it's more about what you shared together. If you were living together, had mutual friends etc. then sure, a year's relationship can be less of a loss than a marriage of 30 years with kids but other than extremes like that, it's such a grey area. I had a four year relationship end, kinda mutually drifted to a conclusion in a way, and I was ready to date pretty much immediately. I had a two year relationship end in a traumatic way, I got dumped with no forewarning, and that took me much longer to get over (maybe five/six months) to be ready to date again. I met my current boyfriend 2.5 months after my last relationship ended and even though that hurt me, I was ready to date because I had gone no contact. There are no hard and fast rules when it comes to moving on from a relationship, whatsoever. Often super long relationships have a longer period of time at the end where both parties realise it's dying, but keep up the motions because so much time has been invested. Many end up separating feeling like nothing but friends anyway.
Author rov Posted November 8, 2014 Author Posted November 8, 2014 Six months is quite a long time, especially if they weren't married. I would trust her on this that she knows what she is capable of right now, and try not to get too invested but don't classify yourself as a 'rebound' already. She's clearly interested so go for it. Why do you think she is clearly interested?
Haerts Posted November 8, 2014 Posted November 8, 2014 Read your post, OP. She liked your pictures, was kind when answering you, accepted to go on the first date AND accepted your invitation to a second one. What else do you need to see that she's interested on you? However, keep in mind that it's still too early to tell anything more clearly. You're still meeting each other, so go slowly.
acrosstheuniverse Posted November 8, 2014 Posted November 8, 2014 The other day she like some photos on me on Facebook and I decided to talk to her, we started to chat and she was very kind. So after some days I told her to meet up and we ended having dinner yesterday. I had a very good time with her and she asked me if I had a girlfriend and how many exes I had, that was very weird because no girl Ive ever dated asked that, then she told me that she broke up 6 months ago from a relationship that lasted 11 years. We had a great time, and at the end I texted her that I had a good time and that if she wanted to go to the movies next week, she told me that she also had a great time and told me that of course she wants to go to the movies next week with me. Everything you said in your opening post indicates she's interested...
Author rov Posted November 8, 2014 Author Posted November 8, 2014 Everything you said in your opening post indicates she's interested... Do you think it would be a good idea to attempt holding hands or kissing her in the next date? Or should I just keep it cool and tell her that I would like to keep knowing her?
Author rov Posted November 10, 2014 Author Posted November 10, 2014 (edited) Today I said hello to her on whatsapp and chatted with her a little about how was her weekend. After this I told her that if she wanted to go to the movies and she answered after 30 minutes answering this: I believe that yes. It would be a good idea to see us. So then I asked her that if she is free on tuesday and she hasnt answered yet. By the kind of answer she gave maybe she is not that interested in me.. Edited November 10, 2014 by rov
Tayken Posted November 10, 2014 Posted November 10, 2014 @OP...you guessed it. You are the rebound guy, and once she sorts things out with the other guy, you will be dropped faster than than a ***** knickers
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