analove Posted November 6, 2014 Posted November 6, 2014 I'm 23 and my husband is 31, we got married 6 months back after a 5 years of relationship. Prior to marriage we had sex like 4 to 5 times (once a year one day overnight picnic) only cz it was a long distance relationship .1st month of marriage was normal, we went for honeymoon enjoyed sex , however his father then was hospitalized for 10 days. I was pregnant ( which we aborted immediately) in the second month. His father is normally unwell all the time, a month later he got hospitalized again n was there for one and half month. My husband is stressed out. Now my father in law is home but bed ridden. Now our life is back on track, however my husband doesn't want physical intimacy. I've tried to talk to him twice he scolded me saying I'm immature.to ask such questions like why don't we have sex n all. One day he up frontly told me that he doesn't want me to become pregnant again n we both have no control so we will have sex when we want baby that is after 3 years. I was really disappointed with this statement. Also we don't go out for dinner or lunch or a day out picnic, nothing at all. My life has become so dull. Do all the household chores take care of in-laws n husband and I don't get anything in return, not even husband's attention as he's full day busy watching wwe or comedy shows or playing games on mobile. I don't understand what to do, in 6 months of marriage we didn't do it from past 5 months being a newly wed. I'm not desperate but I want little physical intimacy.
MuscleCarFan Posted November 6, 2014 Posted November 6, 2014 Have you suggest marriage counseling? I don't see how you can stay in a sexless marriage long term...
leavesonautumn Posted November 6, 2014 Posted November 6, 2014 I've tried to talk to him twice he scolded me saying I'm immature.to ask such questions like why don't we have sex n all. One day he up frontly told me that he doesn't want me to become pregnant again n we both have no control so we will have sex when we want baby that is after 3 years. I was really disappointed with this statement. There are a lot of things going through my mind after reading this in particular. Is he affectionate? Does he show any interest in sex or being intimate? Do neither of you practise safe sex? By that I mean, do you follow a religion that is against it, if not, why aren't you using it? Wanting to have sex with your spouse is not immature, it's natural. If he sees something wrong with having sex then I'm sorry but the signs have always been there, I think you were just blind to it. If he's not willing to discuss the marriage with you, then suggest marriage counselling, if not, then your marriage will never change and you will be unhappy. You could blame it on stress but if you can practically count the number of times you've had sex since you have been in the relationship (5 years) then it's pretty obvious it's not a new development (ie. stress). There are many people who are not interested in sex but to not even share intimacy, I don't know. It's what sets a relationship apart from friendship and both people need to be on the same page.
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