Daph12 Posted November 5, 2014 Posted November 5, 2014 My ex-boyfriend and I have been together for a little more than seven months and he broke up with me 2 days ago. He called me and told me he thought things couldn't work between us anymore. I was really shocked, I never saw it coming. Two weeks ago, he told me he needed space for a few days because he needed to figure things out in his life. He felt like he was seeking happiness from outside sources when it should come from his own self. I told him I understood, that I loved him and respected his need for space. During those few days, he still sent me snap chats saying "Good night beautiful <3" and stuff like that so I didn't worry much about him leaving me. After 4 days he wanted us to talk so he came over, we sat on my porch and he explained what went through his head during those 4 days. He told me he learned that his ex-girlfriend (they've been together for 2 years) was going out with one of his good friend from high school and it really hurt him. He talked with them both. He finally came to the conclusion that he didn't want to end up alone like his mother (his parents divorced when he was 3). He told me he wanted to be with me and that he loved me. I invited him in and we spent the night together. This happened on a friday night. We also spent time together on sunday night, monday night, saturday night, sunday night and almost the whole day together on monday (the day he broke up with me). He was acting his usual funny, out going lovy-dovy self. 3 days before the break up, we were facetiming, each of us laying on our bed, talking about christmas and stuff related to the future. He kept calling me cute names and I felt really in love with him. You know those moments when you realize how much you love the other person? That was one of those moments. To get back to the actual break up, I was devastated. He told me that during the break, he asked his ex to get back together. He had a lot of questions running through his head and needed to talk to his old high school friends to find what made him this depressed about himself. While he was asking her questions, this thought came through his head. Then, I asked him if he really loved me or if it was just a way to feel less alone, since we met a month and a half after he left his ex. He told me he did love me a lot but at some point he just couldn't do so anymore. He realized this when he came back from a trip to France in August. He thought his feelings could come back so that's why he stayed with me. He told me he did believe what he was saying when he told me he loved me during this period. His feelings were just not as strong as they used to be. I'm really hurt right now and it's tough for me because he was my first boyfriend. I'm going to take some time to focus on myself and my own happiness. So now the question is , do you guys think there's any chance we could get back together in a month or two if I still have feelings for him then? He brings me a lot of happiness and we really have the same vision of life. I am not ready to let him go yet. I think we were meant to be together. He often told me he wasn't happy with his ex because he felt like she didn't really love him. Then he would told me he was very lucky to have me and that he wanted us to be together for a long time. We had projects. We wanted to go back to France together. I remeber while he was over there, he told me it kinda made him sad that he was living one of the happiest moment of his life without the most important person in his life, which was me. Anyway, sorry for the super long text! I just want opinions on what I should do , that would really help! Thank you so much!
Strength in Healing Posted November 5, 2014 Posted November 5, 2014 He sounds honest, at least. He confessed to you that he asked his ex to get back together. For that, he deserves credit. A stupid, naive choice to try to reconcile with an ex, but at least he was honest to you about it. He may come back, but a question you should ask yourself deeply, is if you really WANT him to come back. He is wishy washy, not loyal, and shows a propensity for making some severely dumbass decisions. You want him back so bad likely because he was your first love, and to mend the pain and your ego. But if you take a step back, as you will in time, you will see that anyone who would do this to you isn't worth it. And he WOULD do it again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. 1
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