NTCP8 Posted November 5, 2014 Posted November 5, 2014 I stayed single for the last 5 years, and had the time of my life. Three months ago, I met girl who blew me away. The first weeks were amazing, but then she started to talk about her past. I usually don't care about my girlfriends past, but hers was extreme. Let me sketch a few scenario’s: • Her first real boyfriend treated her horrible. She spend a lot of money on him (bought two cars, etc. ) Eventually he cheated on her; • She got a new boyfriend and she cheated on him. It was her birthday, her boyfriend came over to her flat with flowers and she was shagging another guy; • She had an abortion; • She was engaged, broke off and a few days later she a had new guy; • She ditched that guy and one week later, I was with her. After all of this I started to care less about her. When I’m single I don't care what I do, but I dislike cheaters. Last month, a friend of mine came for family related issues to the city where I currently live. I told her that she could stay in my flat. I told my ex this, and she went crazy. Ignored me for two days. I didn't understand this, seeing a few weeks earlier she shared a hotel room with a guy who she had a one night stand with (three years ago). I didn't say anything about it, seeing I’m not a jealous person and I honestly didn't care so much about it. Another situation, few weeks back I was with at her at her parents’ house for a swim in the pool. She said to me ‘I had sex with a married guy’ (before I met her). I left the pool and went to her room to sleep. After 5min she followed me, and she was crying on the floor and said I abandoned her. She is 31. After all of this, I concluded that she has some mental problems, and I broke up with her. I broke up with her on her bday (bad timing, but I didn't want to go see her on her bday), and she was upset. She called me and texted me non stop for 4 days. Even some of her friends tried to call me, I ignored her. I gave in seeing she was asking for her stuff back in my flat. I said that she could pick it up at the reception. Her reaction was, no I actually don't need it anymore. I texted her to meet the next day seeing we were in the same city. We met, we had a talk she gave me **** and said to me that she has to think about if she still can be with me. The next day she sent me an email, and said that she cant be with me. I was a bit drunk, so I didn't read it in detail. She said that she can’t trust me, etc. and she will make sure I will not see her with another guy. Weird. I know she already has someone else. I replied by text, ‘Thanks for the good moments. You are not my type of girl. All the best in life’ During the week I broke up with her I felt so good, but from the moment I started to talk to her, I felt like **** again. I feel bad, because in the end she ‘won’. I was a fool to be with her in the first place. I have a lot of friends, perfect job (travel a lot), seeing other girls, live in one of the most exciting cities in the world, etc, so I don't think so much about it. The girl is a complete nut case, but still I’m frustrated that I played her game or whatever. When I think about how she treated all her ex’s, I get angry. I’m lucky that I got out on time. But still, I feel a bit bad. I’m not in contact with her anymore, but I’m sure I will run into her. Any advice, or someone with a similar experience (if that's even possible)?
jackinthebox1 Posted November 5, 2014 Posted November 5, 2014 Honestly, good luck finding ANYONE with an experience close to that one. She is pretty messed up. You are also messed up. Your last text her was cutting and you should have ended it gracefully. This was a bad relationship that ended badly, there is 0 hope here and for your own good, stay far away
Author NTCP8 Posted November 5, 2014 Author Posted November 5, 2014 Jackinthebox, My friends told me the exact same thing from the beginning, except the part that I'm messed up . I will stay far away from her. I'm not planning to contact her, but I'm sure I will run into her. I remember something what happened 1.5 months ago, her ex ran into her and another guy and her ex insulted her in public for whore. I will never do that, but I'm curious how I will react.
jackinthebox1 Posted November 5, 2014 Posted November 5, 2014 Be cool, curteous and end it like man. Non reactive. End everything well and you will feel much better about that in time
SoThatHappened Posted November 5, 2014 Posted November 5, 2014 Honestly, good luck finding ANYONE with an experience close to that one. Actually, I'm your man. Here's a quick timeline of my ex's last 3 years in life: - Screwed everyone she met - Got pregnant by a guy 1 month into their relationship. She didn't try NOT to get pregnant. Her words. - Broke up with him a month after getting pregnant - Was with other guys while pregnant and after having the baby. - Got back with bio-dad for 2 months then brokeup again. - Met me. Got denied by me (because of her age, not as much the kid) - Met someone online, screwed him the night they met, got engaged to him within 2 months. - Brokeup with him a month after being engaged - Got with me for 2 months. Left me out of the blue for an ex that lived in her same town. - Broke up with him after 2 months to get back with me. - Cheated on me after 7 months with a coworker There were so many red flags I ignored prior to and during our relationship that I could write a book. You got out in time. Run and never look back... please. 1
Author NTCP8 Posted November 6, 2014 Author Posted November 6, 2014 Damn, thats from the same messed up level as the girl I met. Strangely enough, the girl I was with was well educated. Her problem is that she thinks she get everything she wants, she is spoiled. She wants to be the most important person in a guys live. A guy has to do everything for, even sacrificing his career. She contacted me yesterday: I am not sure if you realized but you called me by mistake the other day, I answered but you said nothing. I tried to send you messages after but you obviously have blocked me. It's fine, it's your call. I have done pretty much everything you asked me to- answer your call, answer your message, meet you, give you an answer within a short time.... at this point I really don't know how to deal with you. I have told you things I have not told anyone except for my brother before. That phone call was by accident and my last message was on Monday. Didn't reply, no need for it. Strange email, I never asked to give me an answer or whatever. I broke up with her. She only cares about her reputation in the city where I live, seeing she always wants a guy there.
Author NTCP8 Posted November 8, 2014 Author Posted November 8, 2014 And I ran into her, a bit sooner than expected.* Ignored her though, she was sitting at the front of my favorite bar. She was there with her friends and some guy.* It was hard to control myself. It sounds stupid, but I think she wants me to lose it and insult her.* I'm wondering if she is doing it on purpose. She never went to that particular bar before. I introduced it to her.* She is scared that I will ruin her reputation seeing I know all her darkest 'secrets'.*
OK_computer Posted November 8, 2014 Posted November 8, 2014 I stayed single for the last 5 years, and had the time of my life. Three months ago, I met girl who blew me away. The first weeks were amazing, but then she started to talk about her past. I usually don't care about my girlfriends past, but hers was extreme. Let me sketch a few scenario’s: • Her first real boyfriend treated her horrible. She spend a lot of money on him (bought two cars, etc. ) Eventually he cheated on her; • She got a new boyfriend and she cheated on him. It was her birthday, her boyfriend came over to her flat with flowers and she was shagging another guy; • She had an abortion; • She was engaged, broke off and a few days later she a had new guy; • She ditched that guy and one week later, I was with her. After all of this I started to care less about her. When I’m single I don't care what I do, but I dislike cheaters. Last month, a friend of mine came for family related issues to the city where I currently live. I told her that she could stay in my flat. I told my ex this, and she went crazy. Ignored me for two days. I didn't understand this, seeing a few weeks earlier she shared a hotel room with a guy who she had a one night stand with (three years ago). I didn't say anything about it, seeing I’m not a jealous person and I honestly didn't care so much about it. Another situation, few weeks back I was with at her at her parents’ house for a swim in the pool. She said to me ‘I had sex with a married guy’ (before I met her). I left the pool and went to her room to sleep. After 5min she followed me, and she was crying on the floor and said I abandoned her. She is 31. After all of this, I concluded that she has some mental problems, and I broke up with her. I broke up with her on her bday (bad timing, but I didn't want to go see her on her bday), and she was upset. She called me and texted me non stop for 4 days. Even some of her friends tried to call me, I ignored her. I gave in seeing she was asking for her stuff back in my flat. I said that she could pick it up at the reception. Her reaction was, no I actually don't need it anymore. I texted her to meet the next day seeing we were in the same city. We met, we had a talk she gave me **** and said to me that she has to think about if she still can be with me. The next day she sent me an email, and said that she cant be with me. I was a bit drunk, so I didn't read it in detail. She said that she can’t trust me, etc. and she will make sure I will not see her with another guy. Weird. I know she already has someone else. I replied by text, ‘Thanks for the good moments. You are not my type of girl. All the best in life’ During the week I broke up with her I felt so good, but from the moment I started to talk to her, I felt like **** again. I feel bad, because in the end she ‘won’. I was a fool to be with her in the first place. I have a lot of friends, perfect job (travel a lot), seeing other girls, live in one of the most exciting cities in the world, etc, so I don't think so much about it. The girl is a complete nut case, but still I’m frustrated that I played her game or whatever. When I think about how she treated all her ex’s, I get angry. I’m lucky that I got out on time. But still, I feel a bit bad. I’m not in contact with her anymore, but I’m sure I will run into her. Any advice, or someone with a similar experience (if that's even possible)? That's where you messed up. Why did you text her again? All her efforts were to just get your attention, and when that happened, she wanted the last laugh, and she got it. Seems to me a Grade A Attention seeking B#$%. How old are you guys? My advice is no contact and to move on. I don't think you loved her crazily as it's hard to love a crazy person, so give it time, and the fact that she won will tide over with time until you forget it completely. All my exes 'won'...looking back on it what in fact did the win exactly? They LOST me... lol good luck
Author NTCP8 Posted November 8, 2014 Author Posted November 8, 2014 Ok_computer You are 100% right. I knew she wanted to have the last laugh, and I gave it to her. I was not crazy in love with her. I texted her seeing she had some expensive things in my flat. She asked for it, but in the end she didn't want it anymore. It was just a way to get my attention. I'm 29 and she is 31. I felt like I was with a 21 year old. Every time we argued, she ran away and blocked me. She is now worried that I will tell people certain things, seeing she acts lik she the perfect girl but she is one messed up individual. One more example. She broke the engagement off with her ex and flew back to her home country without giving her ex the time to meet in person. Her ex called her and asked if he could fly over. She said yes, after a 12 hour flight her ex called her and she said 'sorry I don't want to see you'. How can you treat people like that. I'm not an angel, but she is a horrible person. She is not my problem anymore, I start to feel sorry for the next guy she meets. My friends said that she is destructive person. she will not change and all her future relationships will end the same. 1
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