guys who have been cheated and have many failed dating experiences

[liril]

Guys who have been cheated in long term relationships and felt that their ex left them for bigger and better guy.And now they feel insecure about their looks , and are emotionally distant.Even when they are looking for another long term relationship, they give an insecurity vibe and push away other girls who could have been a good potential partner. After being understanding and waiting that they might open up but still don't and girl starts feeling resentment and ultimately leaves and the cycle goes on and on..

 

When do they realise that it isn't the looks, its mainly the emotional connection that keeps a woman attracted to them.Of course physical attraction matters but if they werent physically attractive or sexually good, a girl wont have been in relationship with them in the first place.Of course there might be very few women who left for more attractive partner.But in my opinion there will always be someone better looking than us , be it boy or girl. If a person is mature and is in healthy relationship , he or she will find his or her partner as the most beautiful person . And of course people can grow apart with time or are unhappy for any reason and when it becomes unhealthy for long time, one should leave.But it is the selfishness, immaturity , lack of communication that a person cheats before leaving the current relationship.

 

Please share your experiences:

Guys, what made you gain back your self confidence.

Girls, your experience with emotionally unavailable guys.

 

I had one experience. The guy was handsome and a good person and a could have been a potential partner.His insecurities and emotional unavailablity drove me away. I tried to be patient but with time it built a lot of resentment inside me.Even when I will tell him that communication is not good, he will not 'listen' and instead worry about the pimples on his face which were never an issue for me . Even till the end he looked handsome to me but I had become emotionally distant and he sensed and broke up with me. .I didnt fight for him because I was exhausted telling what was pushing me away but he just never listened. It has been a long time and i have never even once texted him back .He was hurt and so was I. I have accepted that I cant make him see what went wrong . But because the way it ended, sometimes I feel like texting back just to see how is he doing . But I fear of getting into same place, and also of hurting him and myself again .

[Brimstone]

Guys, what made you gain back your self confidence.

 

My ex didn't cheat but I have something to say about self confidence.

 

What helped a ton was reaching out to female friends. Told them my insecurities and everything that was on my mind.

How much I saw myself as a loser.

How I would never find love again.

That there is no one else out there for me.

No one loves me.

And so on.

 

My female friends gave me the ego boost I needed. Said that I was desirable. Had a cool job(musician) Was good looking etc.

Whether they were lying or not is irrelevant. It made me want to get back out there. Think that "Yeah, I'll be happy with someone else. In fact, I'll be happier"!

 

I got back in the game, and have had some decent dates and hookups.

 

If any of you guys can do any of this, go for it! I'll be forever grateful to my friends for pulling me out of the dark.