alisonnecessity Posted November 2, 2014 Posted November 2, 2014 I find it very difficult to trust my boyfriend even though he hasn't done anything thats broke my trust yet. From previous relationships, the experiences didn't help me trust guys more instead I realized that you can't really trust their promises. The guys I've dated gave me their words, but once they're not into me anymore, they don't really care about whatever they said. Are there any suggestions as to how I can trust him more? I really want us to work out, but without trust, the relationship isn't healthy.
CurlyQ Posted November 2, 2014 Posted November 2, 2014 I have had 5 major relationships in my life and all of them ended in the man cheating on me. I didn't let it get me down, though, because I always believed that if a man is going to cheat on you, if he he is going to betray your trust, there is nothing you can do to stop it. Nagging, snooping, or controlling him will not sway his eventual decision to cheat, it will only make him sneakier in doing it. The more you remind yourself of this, the easier it is to trust him until he does something that gives you a reason not to. Not all men are cheaters, but in order to find them, you have to let go of past betrayals.
Jules Dash Posted November 2, 2014 Posted November 2, 2014 Realize that your lack of trust does not hurt the other person; it really hurts you. You see how it will follow you around to every relationship, driving you insane and ultimately destroying every relationship you have with a man? Your boyfriend isn't the victim of your lack of trust, you are. Perhaps professional therapy would be of some benefit.
Tayken Posted November 2, 2014 Posted November 2, 2014 Are there any suggestions as to how I can trust him more? I really want us to work out, but without trust, the relationship isn't healthy. @OP....The first thing you need to do is deal with your past demons. It sounds to me like you are not ready mentally for a relationship by the sound of things. If you were ready, you won't be gauging your current bf against what happened to you prior, and will just focus on the relationship. You mentioned that he hasn't given you any reason not to trust him, so why not communicate more, and let it be known with your bf, what it is that is bugging you?
J21 Posted November 2, 2014 Posted November 2, 2014 I really want us to work out, but without trust, the relationship isn't healthy. I think this is a "you" issue. You have to work this out, your bf hasn't done anything to break your trust, so what is he suppose to work on?
Assasda Posted November 3, 2014 Posted November 3, 2014 the common denominator is you. If you dont pick people trustworthy, youre just going to have to watch your back your whole life Be paranoid forever. You can learn to spot this better, or you can simply live like this forever
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