losing touch with reality

[polaske93]

My ex broke up with Me close to 2 months ago, and it's been close to a month since she started dating my good friend. It has been complete hell, and I've experienced emotions I never want to again. It has been a Rollercoaster of painful thoughts. I was loving out of state for awhile and moved back to my hometown to be with her. I just moved back to where I was living previously yesterday, to try and escape that town and of course the two of them. Now that I'm back out here I feel like my depression is getting worse.. I don't know anyone out here, and I feel like I'm losing touch with reality. It's about 4 A.M. and I woke up freaking out.. Idk what to do.. I miss her so much its killing me. I want to call her and talk to her like everything is fine.. I hate this

[preraph]

I've been through something similar. I was out of my mind trying to find a resolution in my head. My betraying friend was a friend of 17 years, since middle school. I set a time limit (she was my roommate) and gave myself time to cool down before deciding what to do about her. She was the worst offender. She knew me very well and he was someone I'd been dating only a few months. He knew he was doing something crappy and kind of vengeful but he didn't know how bad it really was until his more responsible experienced friends told him. He was inexperienced, was recently divorced from his high school sweetheart.

 

At the end of six weeks, I confronted them both separately. She had done further betrayals in the meantime, taking my address book and crying on other guy friends' and ex-bf shoulders about it, trying to get next to everyone I knew. All but one told her to F off and what a piece of s**t she was, and I confronted the hold out and straightened him out. So it was a big ordeal and I have never been so hurt -- no, damaged. My trust for anyone was gone forever. I ended up working with the guy for years as we were on the same career path. It was a struggle and that wasn't the last of the betrayals from him (the other one being professionally, again out of stupidity) but we remain friends because we just have a lot in common. Not friends like we see each other, but email friends.

 

I threw the "best friend" out and never agreed to see her again. She had a problem wanting to be me. She admitted it. I didn't know that. I told her we were toxic for each other and kicked her out of my life forever. I'm glad I did. She's one reason I'm not on Facebook. I don't want her knowing anything I do or anyone I know to this day.

 

Those people didn't have the depth you thought they did. Neither of them cared much about your feelings. You can't always tell if a person has any substance or not, unfortunately. And some people just have no impulse control or empathy for others. Try not to feel everyone is that way. Some people do have ethics they subscribe to. It's just not easy knowing who.

 

Make yourself go out with friends and don't talk about the situation very much so your friends don't get weary of it. Just make yourself go out and do activities that will give you some happiness. Make new memories and a new life because that's the only way to minimize the bad feelings. You just have to start living life again whether you feel up to it or not. Make yourself do it. Good luck.