winnerwinnerchicken Posted November 1, 2014 Posted November 1, 2014 (edited) Its been 4 months to the day since my girlfriend suddely and almost unexpectedly moved out while I was at work and into another guys place. I did not see this coming, I even read private messages between them 3 weeks earlier and there was nothing indicating that she was about to leave. Luckily my friend drove by and saw her moving her stuff out. After being together for 5 years, being her first hand hold, first love, first everything, as soon as she found out this other guy liked her she. Moved out while I was at work did not tell me where she went did not want to talk to me I didnt know they were together, she denied it and blamed me for her leaving. I asked her if we could work on the issues and she said no. Found out a month later she was with him the whole time. Our relationship was a great one. We got along great. We didnt fight much, we did everything together. I'm sitting here tonight just thinking, after 4 months even when she is with him..how could she just forget about me. How could she just leave and I doubt she'll ever talk to me again. She was my best friend one day, and the next she didnt care if she ever talked to me again. Granted she is only 19, but I dont care what age. We were AMAZINGLY close, and as soon as she found out that he liked her, she acted like I was a cancer to her. Her parting words were, if you hurt ( insert his name) I Will tell the police you beat me and make surey you lose your job. I wasnt allowed to stay in her life, but the 1200 camera, the macbook pro, and her expensive headphones were allowed to stay. I just am sitting here thinking about her with him. Her being so happy, and me being in so much pain still. She did not have to deal with our breakup at all. Its hard to explain over text, but only weeks prior to our breakup, those eyes she would give me, the way she would place her head on my shoulder..how does someone just..forget about you.. I do wish her best in the future, but I do hope someday she has to at least realize that what she did was wrong to me. I did everything with her. Took her to Vegas on her 18th birthday, and we did a lot of other stuff. Its like its all been forgotten. Edited November 1, 2014 by winnerwinnerchicken
preraph Posted November 1, 2014 Posted November 1, 2014 I'm sorry she didn't have the courage to let you know what was going on in her head. It just goes to show you think you know someone, but you didn't really. She's too young to make any sense out of it. People at that age simply don't usually stay with someone very long. It's the time to grow. Realize the brain isn't even fully formed and mature until about 25 or so. She's not even grown her full brain yet, and I'm guessing you either. People outgrow people as they get older or have new experiences. People reach a point where they want to know what they're missing. It's hard for me to imagine a mature relationship at 19 at all when I think how I was at 19. Example: I moved into my first shack without a roommate. A lunch bar patron where I worked overheard me talking about moving and helped me. He never left. So at 19, I let a stranger move in with me, without even us discussing it. We were not having sex, though. He turned out to be a pretty good guy and was ready to take it slow, but what he didn't know is I was already smitten with a guy I'd carry a torch for over the rest of my lifetime. My focus was on him. Once a week, we both magically appeared at this bar with a pool table and looked each other over. I liked the guy at home, but I didn't feel under any obligation under the circumstances. Once he eventually found out I was carrying a torch for this crush, he left. That's a 19 year old brain. I did miss his friendship after that and tried to offer an olive branch once, but he moved on, wisely. I'd have driven him crazy for at least the next 20 years if he hadn't. You didn't deserve the treatment you got. She's just not mature enough to know how to handle herself and didn't have the courage to do that right thing. You are young and I hope you find a new love soon, and I bet you will.
endlessabyss Posted November 1, 2014 Posted November 1, 2014 Even though things are difficult right now, embrace it; you are learning a valuable life lesson right now, one you might never forget. Given time, this will all be a distant memory. 1
AieshaR Posted November 2, 2014 Posted November 2, 2014 aww I know that feeling of thinking everything's been forgotten, it sucks and all you can do is just wonder what went wrong. It's hard because it seems as though you didn't get any closure My advice to you is just keep moving forward, you may get your answers one day but in order for you to heal is just move on..take it day by day ofc! Gain some strength and know that you can definitely do better than a girl who's going to threaten to call the cops :/ thats a little psychotic if you ask me! I have just gotten out of a relationship too & seems as though he's forgotten what we had, it's hard to let that happen but we're better than that! Smile and know that one day you will be more happier than you ever imagined! I do believe in karma and if you do too then let it happen. What goes around comes around! Good Luck!!! 1
Author winnerwinnerchicken Posted November 2, 2014 Author Posted November 2, 2014 Although daily I hold less and less hope and care less and less whether she is coming back but in your experiences do the girls ever come back to talk to the dumpee. Our breakup really wasnt bad. I said some bad stuff once I found out she had cheated on me. Called her a whore once and then basically just said I Wish she would have talked to me about her being bored, I would have done anything she wanted. I think that maybe someday she will check in on me just because we were so close. This guys mother really helped sway her decision, really helped turn her against me. I mean I knew this girl better than she did and she wasnt really unhappy. I still made her smile a lot, I still did stuff with her. Not enough though. This guy is a new experience. Thats another thing I told her. I said after 5 years you wouldnt even let me fight to keep you. I would have done so if you would have given me some warning. Today I sit here with the regret of thinking I didnt do enough. I could have done more to save our relationship. Maybe i'm stupid, maybe i'm blind.
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