jackinthebox1 Posted October 30, 2014 Posted October 30, 2014 I can't believe i'm back on here as i've been on here probably 3 times in the last 4 years. You learn how to handle it but it doesn't get easier unfortunately. All you can do is try to learn for your next relationship and follow a good healing path. I was only with my ex 5 months and we hadn't really had a disagreement. Then one night she came to my place acting so weird my friend and i were sure that she was on drugs. She was sniffing, talking 100mph, not focussing, it was unreal. She mentioned she had seen her ex that night, not sure if that meant anything I text her the next day and asked her if she had done cocaine or something, and then the whole thing went completely crazy. We were still hanging out n she was normal with me, but clearly had issues still. It took 2 weeks for her and she still couldnt let it drop. She harrassed my friends about it, her mum, her friends. My friend that was here at the time and thought she was on coke too, she asked him about it behind my back and somehow came to the conclusion that i had lied and he didnt say that. I had a go at her for asking my friends and generally not believing me when i said. I honestly did think shed taken something and was concerned. We argued over text and broke it off. She text me a day after normal chit chat. I asked her for dinner, she made an excuse. Then she kept texting normally. We spoke on the phone a few times, then i text her and said i care about her and can we meet up face to face. She said she cares a lot too and we met up. Then out of nowhere she broke it off. She said she couldn't handle it right now. She couldn't work out why it was such a big issue and that she completely shut down. I accepted it, wished her well. i KNOW that's the process, that's all it is. She still thinks that i lied about my friend saying he thought she was on drugs. I told her that i wouldn't lie about it. She had a pretty big incident with a guy about 6 months ago and i think thats left a lot of trust issues. My friend is desperate to tell her that she got the whole thing wrong. Should i let him? I dont want her thinking im instigating it and in some respects does it matter? If she loved me enough she would try and work thru it. But i hate her still thinking the worst The whole thing snowballed from my one comment to a huge deal. I refused to apologies because i generally thought it at the time and said i wanted to be honest about it. Thats what drove her up the wall, and thinking im lying. I did apologise in the end but it was too late. I've run this over 100 times in my mind but i just cant work out how it came from being perfect to her breaking it off and would like some female input on this please? Would that be a big enough deal for u to break it off with someone that you had were in love with and had no other issues with? Cheers all and happy healing!
PegNosePete Posted October 30, 2014 Posted October 30, 2014 What is your objective here? Are you trying to get her back?
Author jackinthebox1 Posted October 30, 2014 Author Posted October 30, 2014 Right now, yes i would like her back. But i know that most likely isn't going to happen so i'm going through the initial pain period with a view to getting over it. This is really the therapy part of it. I really want to figure out what happened. i know thats practically impossible and sometimes even they don't know. But wanted an opinion on why she broke it off out of nowhere.
PegNosePete Posted October 30, 2014 Posted October 30, 2014 You're right, from the information you've given there is no way for anyone here to tell why she broke it off.
Author jackinthebox1 Posted October 30, 2014 Author Posted October 30, 2014 Well she spent two weeks annoyed by my comment and i didn't apologise and then we argued about it and she completely shut down saying work was busy, she had issues etc etc. It just seems such a small thing to break something off that i know she was happy with
PegNosePete Posted October 30, 2014 Posted October 30, 2014 Yes, it does. Logical conclusion is that (a) you're wrong in your assumption that she was happy with the relationship, or (b) she did not act rationally.
Author jackinthebox1 Posted October 30, 2014 Author Posted October 30, 2014 That does actually make sense. Cheers
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