Didn't make a move on first date, she seemed interested in a 2nd but no response yet

[mcw12345]

I recently just got out of a long term relationship so I'm extremely rusty when it comes to dating (I was never that good to start with). We're both 25, I work full time and she is a law student for what it matters.

 

We met at the same gym and made small talk for a while. Eventually I felt like she was somewhat interested so I thought why not ask for her number. We went out for dinner and drinks the next weekend.

 

Things were a little awkward to start, but nothing beyond what you'd expect from a first date I suppose. Eventually I may have gotten a little drunk, but not in the sense that I did anything dumb, I just got too comfortable and started acting like I would around my drunk friends- not like I was on a first date. Either way, things went decent but I never made a move aside from some general arm touching and a very brief hand hold. At certain times it seemed like she would walk into me to try and give me a hint, but I was oblivious.

 

We live in New York so nobody drives so we each headed our separate ways on the train. I texted her that night to see if she got back and to tell her I had fun, she said yes and that she had fun as well. That was a Friday. The next Monday I sent a text about a joke we were talking about and she took about half a day to respond. No big deal. That Tuesday asked if she wanted to go to a show with me that weekend. She didn't respond until late Thursday and said that she missed my text and she was sorry but that weekend didn't work, but maybe the next (this) weekend. I said no problem and that my friend was having a party this weekend.

 

That was last Thursday and I haven't heard from her since. Today, I saw her at the gym again but we were on opposite sides. I was too shy to go over and interrupt her workout to say what's up but I feel like we both knew the other person was there. Did I blow it? Can I save this by asking her again or should I just move on at this point?

 

tldr: went on an ok date with girl from gym- didn't make a move- she hasn't responded to my text

[Jules Dash]

Sorry, buddy, but you are not going to win this one. Hey, there are more fish in the sea!

[Phoe]

I personally find it best when the guy doesn't make a move on the first date. Showing restraint is respectful and attractive.

[Georgia2014]

OP

 

Speaking as a woman I do think you somehow did something she didn't like. I think she was trying to be as gentle as she could at telling you she's not interested by saying that weekend didn't work. I think where you went wrong is you got drunk on the first date. It could give her the impression you are an alcoholic.

[Georgia2014]

If I ever went on a first date with a guy and he got drunk that would be the end of it. Maybe she doesn't like a guy who gets drunk. The reason it would be a turn off for me is my ex was an abusive alcoholic.

[mcw12345]

OP

 

Speaking as a woman I do think you somehow did something she didn't like. I think she was trying to be as gentle as she could at telling you she's not interested by saying that weekend didn't work. I think where you went wrong is you got drunk on the first date. It could give her the impression you are an alcoholic.

 

I really wasn't that drunk. Even when I do drink, I've been told I keep it together fairly well. I was probably just a little louder and less calculated in what I said. Regardless, I know it wasn't a good look.

 

She said she that "weekend isn't good, but maybe next?" Was that just her being nice?

[Georgia2014]

I really wasn't that drunk. Even when I do drink, I've been told I keep it together fairly well. I was probably just a little louder and less calculated in what I said. Regardless, I know it wasn't a good look.

 

She said she that "weekend isn't good, but maybe next?" Was that just her being nice?

 

I think she was trying to be nice. She also doesn't respond to your text. If she was interested she would respond and she would have set a definite second date by now. At least that's how I am. If I really like a guy and he asks for a second date I always say yes.

[deathandtaxes]

You should have manned up and at least said hello at the gym. But if she still isn't responding, then so be it. Don't beat yourself up. If you can't be yourself around her, then she's not worth being around.

[Assasda]

Naa move on man.

Sounds like you did everything right.

Cut her lose. - She'll proabably call in a few weeks

but I'm sure you'll be out with a girl that's way more fun and nicer than her