somedude81 Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 When a woman really wants a man, she's gonna work. Mark my words. And how often is a woman really going to want a man? How many guys actually experience that? My impression is that women are generally lukewarm about a guy until they start a relationship. In the getting to know phase, usually the guy is much more interested.
preraph Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 Not much. To get a guy off all you gotta do is suck it without biting it or squeezing the life out of it. Going down on a girl is like WTF do I do here?!!? I thought men were supposed to be natural navigators. 2
Keenly Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 And how often is a woman really going to want a man? How many guys actually experience that? My impression is that women are generally lukewarm about a guy until they start a relationship. In the getting to know phase, usually the guy is much more interested. It happens man. I can think of several that actually looking back on it worked pretty hard. I had never really noticed / thought about it until just now. 3
xxoo Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 And how often is a woman really going to want a man? How many guys actually experience that? My impression is that women are generally lukewarm about a guy until they start a relationship. In the getting to know phase, usually the guy is much more interested. Many men are just as lukewarm, beyond sexual attraction, until a relationship has been started. In fact, they probably won't start a relationship unless they are really into a woman. I think you overestimate how truly interested most men are 6
xxoo Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 Going down on a girl is like WTF do I do here?!!? The mental aspect is so strong. If she's aroused enough, you may barely need to touch her 6
preraph Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 I have to say "working hard" isn't necessarily tied in with how much you like a guy. Sometimes it can just be what mood you're in and have nothing much to do with the guy. A woman might just be an a more aggressive mood at any given time -- or not. A woman might be more outgoing sometimes if she doesn't feel there's a lot riding on it or have as many feelings involved. It can literally go all different ways. And I think some guys are like that as well.
CrystalCastles Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 Going down on a girl is like WTF do I do here?!!? Why not start communicating with the girl first? If you don't know what to do, open your mouth and ask. That's what my boyfriend did, I explained, so now he just spends a good amount of time teasing me, then light flicks of the tongue on my clit and I'm done in under 5 minutes, sometimes even under two minutes. Every girl is different but unless she's a vegetable, she should have some idea of what she likes and doesn't like, as an adult woman. 3
isisisweeping Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 The difference is this: They won't get me that easily. I am the catch. I have value above all of the other guys who she will date and waste her time with... all the numerous idiots while I sit back focusing all my attention on a girl that I believe is worthy of my time. . Now, this is attractive.
ascendotum Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 If that's true, which it isn't really, then this alleged laziness the girls are exhibiting is the boys' fault for handing it all to them. This is true. Its bit of a treadmill thing though like it is with make-up and anti-aging therapies for women. Lots of women resent buying into the beauty industries huge profits, but to stay competitive with other women who do, they do. The guy can go to a party and lean back against the bar and watch all the guys throng around the few cute single women there sucking up to her or trying to out alpha each other to impress her if he wants or he can compete (though there are different styles in that). That cute girl can be like the kid with lots of toys as someone said, and its guys who help create that. With the rise of the hookup culture /OLD / social media its made things like this worse imo. Lots of women have guys buzzing around now, many for LTR many for STR and many for NSA (many of whom are happy to date down for pussy), so it does distort things a bit. Lots of guys can relate to what the OP says. Lots of guys wont though and of course it was not going to go down well with women. Some of the girls that have flaked or been half hearted or had a 'whateva' attitude, will be very different for some other guy that they really desired, so of course they will resent being branded by the OP when they have put a lot more effort in trying to snag and keep other guys. One of my friends has his booty call drive across town to have sex with him on call up. Another has his f-buddy pre cook his meals for the week. They wont understand what the OP is going on about, and the women these guys are screwing will probably complain how lazy guys are later on. When I did well with the body building my ONS sex was better than relationship sex and not because of quality of the girls but their enthusiasm. As some other guy said put more effort into becoming better man - its good advice but also feeds into his compliant too. Saying 'you are the common denominator' while true in many posts here can also be a lame cop out response too. Yes he is the common denominator but that does not negate his experiences totally. Just like that unattractive girl was in another thread complaining how she was not being treated as well as her sexier friends. Its flippant & crap to say she was getting treated worse only because she does not have a positive attitude or because she the common denominator. Its more a case of people don't get treated as special based on their desirability, but for a lot of people that's not a good thing to talk about. 3
ascendotum Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 Newsflash: Women aren't interested in grooming themselves to be your concubine and fantasy sexual object. We consider ourselves much more than a sex toy and only the guys who are able to view us as more get more. So better get used to it. Sometime yes, but sometimes no. Lots of players will get more and its not because they hold that view. 1
Gloria25 Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 Giving head isn't particularly erotic for women, number one. A lot of girls would gladly give up getting head if it meant no more giving it. As far as harder to make a girl -- it's just as easy for a girl to get herself off as it is for you to get yourself off, so what does that tell you? Which women? Giving head is a turn on for me...I mean, especially when you can feel him getting turned on - in your mouth. So, this chick isn't giving up that aspect of the sexual experience.... No, it is harder to get a woman off. We are so "inside our heads". We are more complicated than men. When I first started receiving "head", I remember having to stop worrying about what I look, taste, and or smell down there. I had to stop worrying about what face I might make (cuz they do look up at you to see if you're getting excited). Now, even in times of stress, I had trouble enjoying sex. I literally would start thinking about my job and some people/things I am dealing with - instead of enjoying the moment. I had to "talk to myself" during the sex. I had to tell myself 'look at him, look at him, stop thinking about this or that'. Sometimes I'm so stressed that I even have trouble masturbating. Again, I have to "talk" my self out of worrying about stupid stuff. 3
Phoe Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 Giving head isn't particularly erotic for women, number one. A lot of girls would gladly give up getting head if it meant no more giving it. As far as harder to make a girl -- it's just as easy for a girl to get herself off as it is for you to get yourself off, so what does that tell you? I actually find giving head very erotic. It's a huge turn on. I've never been with a guy who was interested in giving back though, or interested in making me cum at all. It's very difficult to do though, so I wouldn't expect a man to try. 1
somedude81 Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 I actually find giving head very erotic. It's a huge turn on. I've never been with a guy who was interested in giving back though, or interested in making me cum at all. It's very difficult to do though, so I wouldn't expect a man to try. Cue posts from at least 10 guys on how they're up to the challenge 2
Phoe Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 Cue posts from at least 10 guys on how they're up to the challenge Not really...
somedude81 Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 This all depends on the people involved. I don't waste my time trying to pursue lukewarm women. My GF moved 3000 miles to be closer to me. That's far from lukewarm. Meh. That hardly seems like something normal. Also you two must have had a connection for a long time for her to do that. I'm speaking of girls I've known for a month max.
Phoe Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 This doesn't say much about the quality of men you date. I know it doesn't. But these are the only men who pursue me. I don't turn men down, I have no business doing so, and the men I pursue reject me. So in turn, when that kind of man is all I can get, I think it says a lot more about what quality I am personally. All I can do is work on being a decent person, and hope that someday it pays off.
CrystalCastles Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 I actually find giving head very erotic. It's a huge turn on. A like for that. Me too. I never understood women who moan about how gross it is- I mean, you're the reason why your partner is lying there, moaning, his penis swelling under your lips, his whole body tensing? How is it not erotic to be the reason your partner is feeling such pleasure? I've never been with a guy who was interested in giving back though, or interested in making me cum at all. It's very difficult to do though, so I wouldn't expect a man to try. Don't worry Phoe, there are men out there who are eager to pleasure their woman too. Men who aren't selfish. I even made a thread one time asking if there are any men who enjoy going down on a woman, and received an overwhelming amount of positive responses. It might not be easy, but there's no reason why a man shouldn't try his best. 2
NJ123 Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 I know it doesn't. But these are the only men who pursue me. I don't turn men down, I have no business doing so, and the men I pursue reject me. So in turn, when that kind of man is all I can get, I think it says a lot more about what quality I am personally. All I can do is work on being a decent person, and hope that someday it pays off. But let's say if a guy who's really attractive happened to hit on you, you wouldn't date him since he's not the average nerdy type of guy you go for? Or would you actually prefer good looking not nerdy guys if they were available to you over average guys?
somedude81 Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 Of course it's not normal, but it happens. One of my best friends married a girl from another country and she had to move here to be with him too. We had talked for about 6 months online prior to her moving here. We also went to highschool together, but I didn't remember her. Unless you are obviously exceptional in some way, you can't expect a woman you've known for a month to be busting her behind to try and be with you. Why should she? Of course she shouldn't be. That was the point of my entire previous post. Then you gave your example that didn't quite match what I was talking about.
Gloria25 Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 I actually find giving head very erotic. It's a huge turn on. I've never been with a guy who was interested in giving back though, or interested in making me cum at all. It's very difficult to do though, so I wouldn't expect a man to try. Agreed, the guy that first gave me oral was a guy I was with for several years. Since him, only like two guys were interested in taking care of me "down there"...lol. I started watching Hemlock Grove recently and a lot of the sex scenes were about guys going down on chicks....I am still trying to figure out what the subliminal message is behind that. Shoot, maybe that's why I liked the series so much...lol.
Toodaloo Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 I'm right here ladies. Single and willing to travel. As a man I will tell you that I want/need for my woman to genuinely want/need me. There is nothing wrong with a woman being independent in my manly opinion, but you do have to understand the definition of being independent. You are self-sufficient. What you have said about how you own your home, vehicle, pay your own bills, have a career, and an education is wonderful about you. But you have to think a bit like a man concerning those achievements. How would a man fit into your life? How could he contribute? How could he be part of your life? And finally not take me for granted. Oh Frank! The 8 hr plane ride may be too much even for you! But if I am ever in NY I will be in touch! I want a man to feel wanted, needed, useful and yes a bit macho. If that means that I ask him to change the tyre on my car or put up a shelf instead of doing it myself then I will ask. I don't want someone that is just a sperm donor (there are special banks for that now) or some thing just to get my rocks off (there are shops for those things). I want a person who is my friend, my lover and a bit handy about the place be it fixing the internet or taking out the rubbish... It doesn't matter what just that he is someone to share all of lifes ups and downs with and not bunk off just because the hoover needs to be run round or the bills need paying... Frank isn't that what we all want???
Toodaloo Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 Men just have a strong need to feel appreciated. When they feel appreciated and valued, they are usually pretty content. When a man feels like his significant other doesn't appreciate him or doesn't even care if he is around that can really start to affect a man. This is my worry. I am very capable. I will do pretty much everything from brick laying, basic plumbing, decorating, plastering, repairing the roof... Just because I can do them doesn't mean I should when I am in a relationship. Imagine how poop a chap would feel if someone asked if he had sorted out that leak on the roof and he had to reply yeah I sent the other half up there... Its about give and take. 3
Toodaloo Posted October 28, 2014 Posted October 28, 2014 Not much. To get a guy off all you gotta do is suck it without biting it or squeezing the life out of it. Going down on a girl is like WTF do I do here?!!? Really??? So the inch thick book I read about how to do it taught me nothing at all??? Shhhesh... I have got to stop commenting on this thread... Shakes head and walks away... 2
Author boilingpoint Posted October 28, 2014 Author Posted October 28, 2014 That cute girl can be like the kid with lots of toys as someone said, and its guys who help create that. With the rise of the hookup culture /OLD / social media its made things like this worse imo. Lots of women have guys buzzing around now, many for LTR many for STR and many for NSA (many of whom are happy to date down for pussy), so it does distort things a bit. Lots of guys can relate to what the OP says. Lots of guys wont though and of course it was not going to go down well with women. Some of the girls that have flaked or been half hearted or had a 'whateva' attitude, will be very different for some other guy that they really desired, so of course they will resent being branded by the OP when they have put a lot more effort in trying to snag and keep other guys. One of my friends has his booty call drive across town to have sex with him on call up. Another has his f-buddy pre cook his meals for the week. They wont understand what the OP is going on about, and the women these guys are screwing will probably complain how lazy guys are later on. When I did well with the body building my ONS sex was better than relationship sex and not because of quality of the girls but their enthusiasm. As some other guy said put more effort into becoming better man - its good advice but also feeds into his compliant too. Saying 'you are the common denominator' while true in many posts here can also be a lame cop out response too. Yes he is the common denominator but that does not negate his experiences totally. Just like that unattractive girl was in another thread complaining how she was not being treated as well as her sexier friends. Its flippant & crap to say she was getting treated worse only because she does not have a positive attitude or because she the common denominator. Its more a case of people don't get treated as special based on their desirability, but for a lot of people that's not a good thing to talk about. Yep basically. In terms of desirability I think girls are harder to please not because of some worthy trait, but just because if they're in any way attractive the men will come to them, so therefore sex is handed to them. If girls came to me every 2 minutes, I'd no doubt be the same way with this skewed dating BS against THEM not me. And it's all because chicks are almost universally passive in dating. Therefore as a guy it's a lot easier to lose confidence when all is not well in the world of sex and relationships. Also chicks only seem to be able to see one side of your personality once they have their impression of what a guy is like - that's why guys have so much success going through the boring bad boy, alpha male act, which makes them look like *******s to all the other guys looking on. Once you have that persona and rapport with a girl, that's all she sees and goes after, while she remains blase about other guys who are interested. Pure BS... So the solution is to keep making yourself awesome to rise above the competition - i.e. good career, muscular body, fun to be around, assertive etc etc - and all before you get too old to date. And what about the girl? Just show up. The injustice of it....
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