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Do you prefer good looking/beautiful or average looking person and why?

Georgia2014

By Georgia2014
in General Relationship Discussion

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Clay Established Member

Clay

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In my experience beautiful women generally have serious problems. I am sure that not always the case but the vast majority I have met do have that in common. I do also have to agree with another poster. Having a SO that is beautiful does cause a lot of issues with other men hitting on her all the time. Most girls do not handle the attention well and it causes serious issues in a relationship. I have found I appreciate someone with a great sense of humor a hell of a lot more than looks. I also appreciate a woman that has a job.

 

There is so much to be said for a woman with morals these days. They are so hard to find. I have considered asking the government to put them on the endanger species list. :)

Shepp Established Member

Shepp

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I know, I'm just trying to understand why you think that is.

 

 

Look at all the fellas who won't date a girl who earns more than them!

 

 

Though whether it works in practice im not sure - would they really turn down Cheryl Cole (or whatever her surname is now.. Fernady-asdfghjk?) :laugh:

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Haydn Established Member

Haydn

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Cheryl Cole, Shepp. Always a good Saturday evening when she`s on.

 

 

Look at all the fellas who won't date a girl who earns more than them!

 

 

Though whether it works in practice im not sure - would they really turn down Cheryl Cole (or whatever her surname is now.. Fernady-asdfghjk?) :laugh:

normal person Established Member

normal person

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Look at all the fellas who won't date a girl who earns more than them!

 

That makes me scratch my head too. Hypothetically, if you have the option, wouldn't you want the better of the two? Why would you choose to have $1000 over $2000?

 

Does it boil down to insecurity with one's self? Why do guys need women to make less than them? To make himself feel like a breadwinner? Like she's dependent on him? Why do they need this? I'm just playing Devil's Advocate here.

 

In this hypothetical game where we get to pick our partners, my girl's a beautiful specialist doctor. We're both making bank, she doesn't need my money for anything, and we like each other for we are. It's so alien for me to try and comprehend otherwise.

Emilia Established Member

Emilia

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That makes me scratch my head too. Hypothetically, if you have the option, wouldn't you want the better of the two? Why would you choose to have $1000 over $2000?

 

Does it boil down to insecurity with one's self? Why do guys need women to make less than them? To make himself feel like a breadwinner? Like she's dependent on him? Why do they need this? I'm just playing Devil's Advocate here.

 

In this hypothetical game where we get to pick our partners, my girl's a beautiful specialist doctor. We're both making bank, she doesn't need my money for anything, and we like each other for we are. It's so alien for me to try and comprehend otherwise.

It is down to confidence and security yes. People define themselves in different ways, I don't think it's so much about controlling the woman (ie making her dependent) just not wanting her to be more successful. I've experienced it a few times. I thought when the guy was younger he would understand rationally that it was partially that, ie that he hadn't progressed that far yet perhaps in his own career and that he had time. But no, age doesn't seem to make a difference.

 

It is also my experience that men like it when the woman with them is better looking than they are. They like to feel they are punching above their weight. Perception of leagues, like I said.

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skydiveaddict Established Member

skydiveaddict

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Which do you prefer a good looking/beautiful person or an average looking person

 

Most definitely a beautiful girl.

 

and why?

 

Because I am cynical, shallow and self-centered.

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Shepp Established Member

Shepp

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Cheryl Cole, Shepp. Always a good Saturday evening when she`s on.

 

Oh yes! We have this "thing" see - 8 till 10 on a Saturday night I'm all hers mate! Haha :D:bunny:

 

 

That makes me scratch my head too. Hypothetically, if you have the option, wouldn't you want the better of the two? Why would you choose to have $1000 over $2000?

Insecurity.

Cause some guys need external circumstances in place to make them feel masculine. They don't feel like man in their own skin alone!

I've been hopelessly in love with my girl since she was flat broke - if she became a millionaire now then wicked, lets go buy jet ski. You should let other people effect the value you put on yourself but people do.

 

In this hypothetical game where we get to pick our partners, my girl's a beautiful specialist doctor. We're both making bank, she doesn't need my money for anything, and we like each other for we are.

hmm but if shes that specialist are you ever gonna see her? I mean shes gonna be on call like all the time man!! ;)

Mine would be about 5"4, breathlessly stunning, totally hilarious, wonderfully feisty though just a bit of a softy underneath. Rubbish at cooking, though with a hell of a lot of opinions on how I should cook. A right moody git in the mornings, but when she smiles there's nothing better than that - except when I make her smile. And I hope she'll be home for dinner in just over an hour, but I know she'll be late and you could add another half an hour on easy....................hahaha ahh that was a bit schmaltzy for my liking actually :sick::p - ignore me! :lmao::lmao:

central Established Member

central

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For me, a beautiful woman. Why? Because I already have her, I thoroughly enjoy her appearance, and she is extremely compatible in every other way as well.

hotpotato Established Member

hotpotato

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cheating or loyalty comes down to MORALS not aesthetics!

 

 

EVERYONE has the opportunity at some point - wouldn't you rather be with the good looking guy who's turned down the opportunity to cheat than the guy you think is "safer" because he just hasn't been presented with the opportunity - yet!!

You could say his loyalty remains untested!

 

This is the discussion that went on in my thread about The Evil Good Looking Man. Evidently, women are supposed to be attracted to desperate or less attractive men because they supposedly dont have the opportunity to cheat. But oh they will cheat once they get the chance.

 

too desperate/unattractive cheat =/= attractive

being faithful because women cockblock you=/= attractive

only good because you cant be bad =/= attractive

 

 

I prefer attractive men. Ive dated all kinds of men, but I do want to be attracted to him.

Phoe Established Member

Phoe

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I know, I'm just trying to understand why you think that is.

 

It's like asking why I like green more than I like red.

 

It just happens to be what I prefer. It's more appealing to me.

MissBee Established Member

MissBee

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I prefer an average looking man that is heavier because I feel women are more prone to encourage a good looking man to cheat. I feel like an average looking heavier man will be insecure and not so prone to cheat. I was obese until three years ago. I felt insecure and shy. I still feel that way even though I am only 40 pounds over weight based on the BMI calculator.

 

Which do you prefer a good looking/beautiful person or an average looking person and why?

 

This is faulty logic as overweight people and even unattractive people still cheat since looks are subjective and there will always be someone who likes a particular look, not to mention cheating isn't only about looks.

 

I like men I'm attracted to. Period. Some may be conventionally good looking, others may not be as good looking but I am attracted to them. I don't choose men based on thinking how they look will or won't lead to cheating. Generally though I'd say most of my bfs have been slightly above average to very good looking.

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Revolver Established Member

Revolver

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People want a good looking partner for the status symbol. Sex with a "hot" person is no better than sex with a not so hot person. They want to be able to go to the party, family gathering etc and be like "Look what I pulled"

normal person Established Member

normal person

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It's like asking why I like green more than I like red.

 

It just happens to be what I prefer. It's more appealing to me.

 

I understand but I was curious to hear some introspection or psychoanalysis. I could say I like green because it makes me think of grass, warmer weather, being outside and active. I suppose I want be out and about in the world experiencing things rather than inside hiding from them. I don't want to miss out on anything because I want the most out of life. I could say I probably don't like red as much because it makes me think of blood, which I associate with hospitals and bad memories/experiences there.

 

So if you want to share (and you're certainly under no obligation, I'm really just endlessly curious) is there any psychological/biological root of it all, do you think? Ex: I like attractive women partially because I want what's best for myself, I can't settle. I like getting what I want and it's hard for me to accept less. Maybe I've always gotten what I want and I'm spoiled or afraid to deal with the discomfort or downgrade of anything less. Perhaps I like a little bit of a challenge if the girl presents it. Maybe I don't feel as accomplished when other girls are seemingly handed to me.

 

See what I mean? As I said, I'm just curious. There's no need to dive deeper if you don't want. When someone says something that's so incongruous to my thought process it really makes me want to know more. The thread title is "...and why," I'm assuming everyone's "and why" isn't "because I just do."

 

People want a good looking partner for the status symbol. Sex with a "hot" person is no better than sex with a not so hot person. They want to be able to go to the party, family gathering etc and be like "Look what I pulled"

 

I've never felt that way. I like good looking women because I like looking at them and for the reasons above. The way they look creates a really great physiological affect that magnetizes me towards them. That feeling is really what it's all about. If I wanted a blatant, relatively impractical status symbol, I'd buy nicer cars.

Frank2thepoint Established Member

Frank2thepoint

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Which do you prefer a good looking/beautiful person or an average looking person and why?

 

Completely subjective for me. I've been attracted to women of all shapes, sizes, age, ethnicity, religious background, eye color, hair color, and so on.

SteveC80 Established Member

SteveC80

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I think average and unattractive people try to convince themselves they'd rather an average partner because it's the best they can get.

 

It's also lack of self esteem and a defense mechanism

Anela Established Member

Anela

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I'm sort of intrigued when people say things like this (not that there's anything wrong with it, of course).

 

For the sake of discussion, why wouldn't you want someone who's nerdy but also good looking? Conventional wisdom thinks you'd want the option that's most superior rather than one that's merely befitting. Assuming these two hypothetical guys like you and treat you all the same, wouldn't you want the "better" one?

 

I've heard people say things like this before, give different explanations, and it usually makes me scratch my head. Because if I've actually got the choice, of course I'd want my partner to look as good as possible.

 

Personality, chemistry... prettier isn't always better.

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love1336x Established Member

love1336x

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average looking man that is heavier because I feel women are more prone to encourage a good looking man to cheat.

 

 

Sadly enough that isn't true at all for my case. I had dated an over weight cop, who was 5'4, and cheated on me with an ex who treated him like crap, but once he started to move on with his life. She got him back. </3

 

My recent ex even though... they didn't have sex, or anything sexually that I know of. This big booty girl gave him attention, and made him thought he had a chance, but all reality she was using him as emotional tampon. I think given the chance he would have cheated on me with her.

This man is about 60 pounds over weight, average looking.

 

I think women will start problems reguardless on how a man looks... If the man gives that woman the time and day to start the drama...

Imported Established Member

Imported

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I have only ever dated beautiful women.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

No, seriously. All of them were in great shape, nice bodies, pretty face and pleasant to be around. Not a "subjective" thing. They were all conventionally beautiful. Some more so than the others.

Edited by Imported
Phoe Established Member

Phoe

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Normal_person, my tablet is having issues when I try to quote, so I'll just respond here.

 

I don't have any psychoanalysis about it. Average nerdy guys are what I'm comfortable around. They're what gives me butterflies. What I get along best with.

 

Conventionally good looking guys do nothing for me. Brad Pitt and George Clooney do nothing for me. I understand that they're good looking, and that women like them, but I'm personally not attracted. They're not what I want.

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Georgia2014 Established Member

Georgia2014

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It is sad that so many people say beautiful/good looking. Only shallow people would say beautiful/good looking.

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NJ123 Established Member

NJ123

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It is sad that so many people say beautiful/good looking. Only shallow people would say beautiful/good looking.

 

Well it's just reality. People want to be with the most attractive person they could possibly get with.

 

For me personally, if I had to choose between an extremely attractive woman with a ****ty personality, or a less attractive woman with a heart of gold & an amazing personality, I'd choose the less attractive woman.

 

But if the decision was between an attractive woman with a heart of gold & amazing personality or an average looking woman with the same qualities of course I'd go with the more attractive woman.

normal person Established Member

normal person

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Personality, chemistry... prettier isn't always better.

 

Believe me, I'm well aware. I've resisted some very good looking girls who I knew were no good for me.

 

It is sad that so many people say beautiful/good looking. Only shallow people would say beautiful/good looking.

 

Why? Are you assigning a lack of compatibly to the good looking person and the presence of compatibility to the average looking person? Because that isn't part of this. The question isn't "would you rather have an average looking person you're compatible with or a good looking person you aren't compatible with?" The compatibility is assumed. I want a good looking girl on the premise that she's compatible with me. I didn't think I needed to clarify that.

 

Assuming two people have exactly the same personalities and chemistry with you, do you really take the less good looking one?

 

Let's say you need money. A magic genie says you can have $1000 or $2000. Which do you take?

EasyHeart Established Member

EasyHeart

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Why on Earth would I want to date a woman who isn't attractive? That's kinda the whole point of dating vs. being friends.

 

That being said, to me it's a binary decision: a woman is either attractive enough to date or she isn't. I don't line-up women and think "#3 is prettier than #7 and #2, so I've got to date #3". But she has to be pretty enough that I want to get naked with her. Otherwise there's no point.

Andy_K Established Member

Andy_K

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That being said, to me it's a binary decision: a woman is either attractive enough to date or she isn't. I don't line-up women and think "#3 is prettier than #7 and #2, so I've got to date #3". But she has to be pretty enough that I want to get naked with her. Otherwise there's no point.

 

I think most guys would classify women into one of three levels of attractiveness:

 

1) hot enough to date or be considered serious gf material

2) attractive enough to sleep with under the right circumstances (perhaps alcohol, or no strings attached), but no intention to take things further

3) no attraction whatsoever.

 

Within a group, differing attractiveness doesn't matter much and it's all about the personality, but no amount of 'nice' can bump a 3 to a 2, or a 2 to a 1.

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