bumblebee86 Posted October 26, 2014 Posted October 26, 2014 I had a one night stand, which I've never done before. Only been with one other person before, but that long term relationship ended badly many months ago, which left me feeling rejected and pretty low. Then started drinking every weekend, going out clubbing, meeting random boys. This was the first one I've got with, got along really well. It was fun being with him. We had some good conversation. He hasn't contacted me since, which I know is not surprising. Would it be desperate to contact him? He's very confident, and I'm also pretty embarrassed that he saw me naked - I'm pretty self conscious, and Ive only ever been intimate with one other person like this. So Im also pretty afraid of getting rejected if I do text him, and he's not interested. Guess I just wanted to spend some more time with him, because we clicked a lot. But not sure if worth the risk? Should i just move on and just remember it as a fun night? Or text and see what happens, and if no reply, just move on?
mammasita Posted October 26, 2014 Posted October 26, 2014 Does he have your number? If so, leave it alone. Usually a one night stand is just that......a one night stand. If he is interested in more he will reach out to you. 1
acrosstheuniverse Posted October 26, 2014 Posted October 26, 2014 You have nothing to lose by texting a light 'hey, the other night was fun how's your week going?' you'll know quickly whether he's interested in seeing you again or talking to you, just bear in mind due to how this began that he may only be interested in sex with you. However, you know yourself best, and if you think that you might be too fragile to take the rejection, perhaps it's best to delete his number and move on and enjoy the memory for what it was. Remember, he could have messaged you too, and it is customary (Right or wrong) for the guy to take the lead in these situations if they're interested. So I wouldn't go presuming he will have a high interest level.
ja123 Posted October 26, 2014 Posted October 26, 2014 If he hasn't contacted you after a one-night stand, then he's just not that into you for whatever reason. I wouldn't bother contacting him because if he does respond it'll be because you're in the booty-call category in his mind, and it sounds like you have attachment already. FWB situations are very tricky to negotiate without one person getting hurt. Cut down on your drinking and date guys when sober. Cultivate your options, so you don't have all your eggs in one basket and over-commit too early. 1
Diezel Posted October 26, 2014 Posted October 26, 2014 You already labeled it a one night stand, so why reach out to him if he hasn't reached out to you? Just leave it alone.
Author bumblebee86 Posted October 26, 2014 Author Posted October 26, 2014 thanks for replies. Yeah he's definitely got my number. i skipped out early in the morning, because he was hinting overnight he had to be up early - im sure an excuse. but when i left..he was like aw it would have been nice to have a cuddle. thats what made me think i should text, because he might think im not interested, but realise that's just wishful thinking. guess not suited to this one night stand business and will have to move on.
newmoon Posted October 26, 2014 Posted October 26, 2014 if you do hear from him again it'll be for more sex. one night stands rarely become some lasting wonderful love story. although cue the posts from those who are the exceptions... move on and leave the guy alone. he knows how to pick up a phone if he likes you enough.
ExpatInItaly Posted October 26, 2014 Posted October 26, 2014 thanks for replies. Yeah he's definitely got my number. i skipped out early in the morning, because he was hinting overnight he had to be up early - im sure an excuse. but when i left..he was like aw it would have been nice to have a cuddle. thats what made me think i should text, because he might think im not interested, but realise that's just wishful thinking. guess not suited to this one night stand business and will have to move on. No, if he's interested in seeing you again, he will get in touch. Just keep in mind that he might only be after sex. If that's cool with you, proceed. If not, don't respond if and when he does contact you.
Assasda Posted October 27, 2014 Posted October 27, 2014 I would have told you not to bother contacting, But judging from your 2nd post, I can see that your self-esteem is super low. So I think that you SHOULD contact him. Ask if he wants to go out for drinks again. If he doesnt respond. Move on
IronZ Posted October 27, 2014 Posted October 27, 2014 Why don't you just ask him out on a date and make sure sex is off the table. That's how you'll know if he's interested.
smackie9 Posted October 27, 2014 Posted October 27, 2014 This guy was a player, smooth talker, knows what a little alcohol, flirting and a couple of complements can do to a girl like yourself. Sorry hun, there was no love connection, just a guy that wanted to get laid. 1
smackie9 Posted October 27, 2014 Posted October 27, 2014 Like I always say, the guy doesn't call is because he doesn't want to. 1
Andy_K Posted October 27, 2014 Posted October 27, 2014 If you're brave enough to get naked with a guy after a couple hours, then you should be brave enough to send him a text the dext day too. There's a good chance he's not interested, but at least you'll have peace of mind. And there's always a few people out there who do start dating/relationships this way. 1
Emilia Posted October 27, 2014 Posted October 27, 2014 thanks for replies. Yeah he's definitely got my number. i skipped out early in the morning, because he was hinting overnight he had to be up early - im sure an excuse. but when i left..he was like aw it would have been nice to have a cuddle. thats what made me think i should text, because he might think im not interested, but realise that's just wishful thinking. guess not suited to this one night stand business and will have to move on. He meant sex. I wouldn't bother. In the future don't take guy's numbers, only give them yours. Then it's up to them to contact you and it's clear who should be doing that. 4
Author bumblebee86 Posted October 27, 2014 Author Posted October 27, 2014 yep thanks for the advice guys!
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