Mi7522 Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 We got together through a mutual friend and everything was going well, she introduced me to her friends, family and kids. The last two weeks we spent every night together and but I'm sure I was too accommodating. It's been almost 5 weeks lc, a little here and there but nothing substantial. I'm moving on but really would like something back from her that she knows I want but having a difficult time figuring out how to go about getting it back. Btw she knows what I'm looking for but has made no attempt at getting back to me. Any ideas how to go about this so I can cut ties?
Ducky71 Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 Just don't contact her anymore, easy peasy. Forget it and move on, some things just weren't meant to be...
Author Mi7522 Posted October 21, 2014 Author Posted October 21, 2014 You're missing the point, I would like to have it back and don't want her to think I'm contacting other than to get it back. Just trying to figure out a way to get what's mine
SoThatHappened Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 Just contact her telling her you want it back. Simple as that. Who cares what it may look like to her. She has something of yours. It doesn't sound like it was a serious relationship, nor does it sound like it was a bad breakup (I could be wrong). Just ask for it back, even find a way where you don't have to physically see each other to get it.
Author Mi7522 Posted October 22, 2014 Author Posted October 22, 2014 I was doing great for the last 5 weeks and last night I sent her a Happy Birthday text. I guess I just wanted to let her know I was thinking of her. I think I messed up ugghhh.
PegNosePete Posted October 22, 2014 Posted October 22, 2014 Never mind eh. There's no gold medals for NC duration. Apart from feeling bad, there is no consequences for breaking NC. You don't even get a 1 month abstinence chip. Just remember next time you're thinking of breaking it, how it made you feel this time... 5
Bfef Posted October 22, 2014 Posted October 22, 2014 Never mind eh. There's no gold medals for NC duration. Apart from feeling bad, there is no consequences for breaking NC. You don't even get a 1 month abstinence chip. Just remember next time you're thinking of breaking it, how it made you feel this time... This, a thousand times,this I've broken NC a few times, just snap out of it and say to yourself "OK the REAL no contact starts now" and mean it this time!
tikay00 Posted October 22, 2014 Posted October 22, 2014 When you break NC, do you have to start from day 1, or do you just continue on your NC, and count that as a hiccup?
Chi townD Posted October 22, 2014 Posted October 22, 2014 Dude, you aren't the first to break NC and you won't be the last. We don't throw anyone in LS jail if they break NC. It was a birthday text. Nothing more and nothing less. Chances are she's going to ignore it. Just go about your day and try to forget about it. 2
Author Mi7522 Posted October 22, 2014 Author Posted October 22, 2014 She did reply about a half hour after I sent it last night.
Author Mi7522 Posted October 22, 2014 Author Posted October 22, 2014 tikay00 I would assume once no contact is broken it's back to day 1 1
tikay00 Posted October 22, 2014 Posted October 22, 2014 tikay00 I would assume once no contact is broken it's back to day 1 Damn......
SoThatHappened Posted October 22, 2014 Posted October 22, 2014 If you have to define it, just call it ELC (extremely low contact) prior to starting NC. It doesn't matter. Most of us slip up, even when in NC and even when we KNOW not to do it. 1
BC1980 Posted October 22, 2014 Posted October 22, 2014 It's okay. Most people do break it, but you learn the hard way. You won't do it again. I broke it at 3 months, and I ended up crying to my ex on the phone. I'm cringing just thinking about it, so at least you only sent a happy bday text. It could have been a lot worse. 1
Author Mi7522 Posted October 22, 2014 Author Posted October 22, 2014 Unfortunately I will have to break it again as she has something valuable of mine that she knows I want back but has not made any attempt to get it to me.
SoThatHappened Posted October 22, 2014 Posted October 22, 2014 Any way a friend or a neutral party can get that back from her? If so, tell her that so-and-so will be coming over to her place on Saturday at 2:00 to get it if that works. Or just tell her to mail it if it can be mailed. THEN... NC My ex kept a book of my Dad's and family home movies of mine. She could have easily mailed them, but instead used them as a way to contact me and said she would drop them off at my doorstep. I told her to throw all of it away. Seeing her would have hurt, and I was cutting out every connection I possibly could. I'm better off for avoiding her altogether, and you will be too.
Author Mi7522 Posted October 22, 2014 Author Posted October 22, 2014 It can't be mailed and I don't really want our mutual friends to get involved ( not fair to them) so I was just thinking of saying that I would drop by tomorrow during my lunch when no one is at her house and have her leave it her she'd. Good idea or no?
SoThatHappened Posted October 22, 2014 Posted October 22, 2014 That works. You won't have to see each other, and you won't be able to say or do anything you can regret down the road. 1
BC1980 Posted October 23, 2014 Posted October 23, 2014 Yeah, I definitely would get is back ASAP, so you can move on. Otherwise, it's a way to hang on. Definitely arrange it where you don't have to see her.
NoLeafClover Posted October 23, 2014 Posted October 23, 2014 We got together through a mutual friend and everything was going well, she introduced me to her friends, family and kids. The last two weeks we spent every night together and but I'm sure I was too accommodating. It's been almost 5 weeks lc, a little here and there but nothing substantial. I'm moving on but really would like something back from her that she knows I want but having a difficult time figuring out how to go about getting it back. Btw she knows what I'm looking for but has made no attempt at getting back to me. Any ideas how to go about this so I can cut ties? lots of masturbation
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