Poptarts Posted October 19, 2014 Posted October 19, 2014 I am pregnant - To my big suprise because I have been struggling with infertility for years. So I am not on birthcontrol, I don't keep track of my periods. Couldn't get pregnant for 15 years trying with ex husband. Problem is with my fertility. I had been dating a guy for a few months and we both got tested for std's... So we could have safe sex. Last time we had sex was on september 28th. He broke up with me On october 1st I looked for comfort with My ex husband and things got out of hand. No intercourse but we did some handwork. I was stimulating him with my hands.. Suddenly he stands up, and went into the bathroom. When he returned he started stimulating me. When I finished I wanted to return the favor but he told me he finished too, that's why he left to the bathroom to clean up. So I can't rule out he may have had some semen on his hands when he stimulated me with his fingers. Since that day we have been talking about getting back together again because he is still in love with me. On october 8th we had unprotected intercourse. Last monday I started to have symptoms and dreams of being pregnant. On october 16th I had a very positive pregnancy test. UNBELIEVABLE!!! I did a clearblue with conceptionpredictor, it said 2-3 weeks pregnant. A day after I did the test again with morningurine, it said 3+ pregnant. How accurate are these test? I'm affraid I'm pregnant of the guy I was dating and not my ex husband. What do you think? Yes I know I made a big mess. you can tell me .. But please some advice too.
michellew Posted October 19, 2014 Posted October 19, 2014 Pretty sure your ex boyfriend got you pregnant. If your ex husband couldn't get you pregnant for so long, I doubt he impregnated you with semen from his hand on Oct 1st. If you conceived on the 8th, I doubt a pregnancy test would read positive only one week later. Do you remember when your last period was? Ballpark? If it was mid September, chances are you were ovulating (ie. most fertile) on September 28th. 1
Author Poptarts Posted October 19, 2014 Author Posted October 19, 2014 My ex-husband is normal fertile. He has two children from prior marriage age 17 and 19. The problem is with my tubes. But I had one lucky shot this time I think. Thanks for your answer I'm afraid you are right.
Fondue Posted October 19, 2014 Posted October 19, 2014 Chances are it was your ex-bf. If your husband was unable to get you pregnant all this time, he may he may also have had fertility issues. You should inform both men so they're adequately prepared.
dclan Posted October 19, 2014 Posted October 19, 2014 It doesn't really matter who is the father, you will find out eventually with a DNA test. Could be any of them. What you need to focus more is on telling your ex husband (and ex boyfriend) that you are pregnant, and you don't know who the father is. By the way, don't say "I made a big mess". You shouldn't feel sorry for yourself. You did NOTHING wrong. It is a messy situation indeed, but not your fault. Its not like you cheated on your partner, got pregnant by another man, and now don't know what to do. You had a boyfriend, had sex, he broke up with you. Then, you had sex with another man (as it is your right as a single woman). Then finally you found out you were pregnant. It happens, thats all. Don't feel bad about yourself. In fact, be proud, you are going to be a mother. 4
ExpatInItaly Posted October 19, 2014 Posted October 19, 2014 First, go to your doctor and confirm whether you are actually pregnant. Second, speak to both your ex-boyfriend and ex-husband. Let them know that you're pregnant.. I would wager your ex-boyfriend is the father, though. 1
SawtoothMars Posted October 19, 2014 Posted October 19, 2014 I am pregnant - To my big suprise because I have been struggling with infertility for years. So I am not on birthcontrol, I don't keep track of my periods. Couldn't get pregnant for 15 years trying with ex husband. Problem is with my fertility. I had been dating a guy for a few months and we both got tested for std's... So we could have safe sex. Last time we had sex was on september 28th. He broke up with me On october 1st I looked for comfort with My ex husband and things got out of hand. No intercourse but we did some handwork. I was stimulating him with my hands.. Suddenly he stands up, and went into the bathroom. When he returned he started stimulating me. When I finished I wanted to return the favor but he told me he finished too, that's why he left to the bathroom to clean up. So I can't rule out he may have had some semen on his hands when he stimulated me with his fingers. Since that day we have been talking about getting back together again because he is still in love with me. On october 8th we had unprotected intercourse. Last monday I started to have symptoms and dreams of being pregnant. On october 16th I had a very positive pregnancy test. UNBELIEVABLE!!! I did a clearblue with conceptionpredictor, it said 2-3 weeks pregnant. A day after I did the test again with morningurine, it said 3+ pregnant. How accurate are these test? I'm affraid I'm pregnant of the guy I was dating and not my ex husband. What do you think? Yes I know I made a big mess. you can tell me .. But please some advice too. First off... Congratulations!!! My wife and I have been struggling with infertility for a while now. It may suck to have this baby from a man you don't love... but realistically... a baby is a baby! Just confirm you are pregnant and give it a few months. Tell the xHusband the situation once you are sure. Chances are he is going to believe it's his and get really excited. I would in his place. DNA test the child once born and confirm. If it's not his he will find a way to deal with it.
IronZ Posted October 19, 2014 Posted October 19, 2014 Idk where any of you got your scientist degrees but sperm tends to die when exposed to the elements. It's extremely unlikely that he had some on his hand and got you pregnant from a . Most likely it's the guy you actually had sex with. 3
FitChick Posted October 20, 2014 Posted October 20, 2014 Don't say anything for three months. Most miscarriages happen in the first three months and it may solve your problem. 2
Natsu21 Posted October 20, 2014 Posted October 20, 2014 If all else fails, I know a man named Maury Povich who I hear is great with these kinda problems. 1
Purepony Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 It doesn't really matter who is the father, you will find out eventually with a DNA test. Could be any of them. What you need to focus more is on telling your ex husband (and ex boyfriend) that you are pregnant, and you don't know who the father is. By the way, don't say "I made a big mess". You shouldn't feel sorry for yourself. You did NOTHING wrong. It is a messy situation indeed, but not your fault. Its not like you cheated on your partner, got pregnant by another man, and now don't know what to do. You had a boyfriend, had sex, he broke up with you. Then, you had sex with another man (as it is your right as a single woman). Then finally you found out you were pregnant. It happens, thats all. Don't feel bad about yourself. In fact, be proud, you are going to be a mother. Yeah its your right to sleep around without protection ....yeah don't be sorry
ascendotum Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 It could be either but I'd put my money on the ex bf. I gather you are really happy to be pregnant now. Congratulations. Does it matter if its now 15 yrs too late and you might well end up raising it on your own now? Lets hope it turns out to be the ex husband as the father as it seems that could well reboot a 2nd relationship with you two and he'd more likely be happy to hear the news. I think you should tell both about the baby soon if you intend to keep it no matter what. the conversation would go down better if the father of the baby was known though. If I was dating a woman for a couple of months in a nothing serious relationship who assured me should could not get pregnant, I'd hate to get a call from her saying 'guess what you ain't going to believe this, but I'm pregnant and I'm keeping it, so I'm hope your on board with this, so I don't have to get a lawyer involved.'
Diezel Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 It doesn't really matter who is the father Yes, yes it does matter.
gaius Posted October 21, 2014 Posted October 21, 2014 I probably would have ruled out the ex-husband until I heard Melissa Etheridge talk about how she impreganted her girlfriend. David Crosby basically brought over a paper bag with his semen cup in it, she brought her girlfriend to orgasm and then stuffed it in. Sounds about on the same level as what the exhubby did.
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