SG19765 Posted October 17, 2014 Posted October 17, 2014 I'm really running into a dead end here. The girl I've been dating for roughly 9 months is turning into a major bitch. I'm not always the most pleasant person to be around but I have to be honest I feel I am continuosly putting effort into this relationship. She never seems to understand were I am coming. For instance last night I got off of work roughly at 8pm. She went with her friend to eat and called me around 11pm. I wasn't in the best of moods but was still excited to talk to her. We spoke for about 3 minutes and I said something that pissed her off and she hung up. She called me back around 1145 we talked but she told me I was being very short. I told her I am just a little sick and grumpy because it was along day. She continued to pick until finally I asked her why she has such a hard on for me. This escallated into her hanging up on me and me kissing her ass and texting her until 3 in the morning. This is a constant thing with her lately. It's start to really wear me thing. I do love this girl, have a bond with her like I have never had with anyone. I just seem to be wearing thin, to the point were last night I found myself thinking about what it would be like to be with someone else. Is there anyways to work around these constant arguments? Or should I just leave? I would really like to work this out but its getting to me pretty bad.
acrosstheuniverse Posted October 17, 2014 Posted October 17, 2014 I'm really running into a dead end here. The girl I've been dating for roughly 9 months is turning into a major bitch. I'm not always the most pleasant person to be around but I have to be honest I feel I am continuosly putting effort into this relationship. She never seems to understand were I am coming. For instance last night I got off of work roughly at 8pm. She went with her friend to eat and called me around 11pm. I wasn't in the best of moods but was still excited to talk to her. We spoke for about 3 minutes and I said something that pissed her off and she hung up. She called me back around 1145 we talked but she told me I was being very short. I told her I am just a little sick and grumpy because it was along day. She continued to pick until finally I asked her why she has such a hard on for me. This escallated into her hanging up on me and me kissing her ass and texting her until 3 in the morning. This is a constant thing with her lately. It's start to really wear me thing. I do love this girl, have a bond with her like I have never had with anyone. I just seem to be wearing thin, to the point were last night I found myself thinking about what it would be like to be with someone else. Is there anyways to work around these constant arguments? Or should I just leave? I would really like to work this out but its getting to me pretty bad. Your problem, presuming that you haven't actually done anything to genuinely piss her off, is that you are rewarding the behaviour through kissing her ass. Next time she hangs up on you (which is extremely rude and personally something I can't imagine doing unless it was a really major argument about something serious or I didn't trust what I was going to say if I stayed on the line), you leave her to it. Send her a text saying: 'I don't appreciate it when you hang up on me, it's rude and disrespectful. I'll speak to you tomorrow when we have both calmed down. Goodnight.' And BE FIRM. It's the only way. Sorry to say but if you've only been seeing each other for nine months and it's already devolving into these kinds of petty nasty arguments, it doesn't really look good. And you're having thoughts of being with others so soon? Not good! Hopefully if you manage her behaviour in this manner she will learn that she can't keep being childish because it gets her nowhere. But you do have to decide whether or not you actually want a relationship with somebody immature. Obviously your behaviour could be a huge problem too, we don't know her side of the story, maybe you're fuelling it, what do you mean by 'I'm not always the most pleasant person to be around'?
Author SG19765 Posted October 17, 2014 Author Posted October 17, 2014 Your problem, presuming that you haven't actually done anything to genuinely piss her off, is that you are rewarding the behaviour through kissing her ass. Next time she hangs up on you (which is extremely rude and personally something I can't imagine doing unless it was a really major argument about something serious or I didn't trust what I was going to say if I stayed on the line), you leave her to it. Send her a text saying: 'I don't appreciate it when you hang up on me, it's rude and disrespectful. I'll speak to you tomorrow when we have both calmed down. Goodnight.' And BE FIRM. It's the only way. Sorry to say but if you've only been seeing each other for nine months and it's already devolving into these kinds of petty nasty arguments, it doesn't really look good. And you're having thoughts of being with others so soon? Not good! Hopefully if you manage her behaviour in this manner she will learn that she can't keep being childish because it gets her nowhere. But you do have to decide whether or not you actually want a relationship with somebody immature. Obviously your behaviour could be a huge problem too, we don't know her side of the story, maybe you're fuelling it, what do you mean by 'I'm not always the most pleasant person to be around'? I have a short temper. So yes certain things can piss me off and when they do I tend to get mad quickly, I do calm down rather quickly as well. I'm not saying that I'm not half the blame. The problem is we both have issues from childhood that affect our relationships. Hers a deeper than mine. I don't want to divulge on hers, but as for mine, my father was a pretty nasty drinker when he was young and I witnessed some pretty messed up **** and was victim to some as well. My father and myself have made peace but it still affects my aggression. When me and this girl get along we are awesome together but there just seems to be some sort of problem when it comes to control of emotions or letting our walls down. I'm honestly thinking of suggesting therapy for both of us. If it doesn't help the relationship at least we can come to terms with this stuff.
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