SameOldFear Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 A week or so ago my ex reached out to me and asked for money. I posted about it and a few of you were really nice and supportive. But since then my ex has apologized and continuously texts me and has called a couple of times. I was on NC. And oh my God, I wish I hadn't broke it. I should have ignore the phone call. Four months of progress just vanished. He talks to me about deep things and our favorite books and music and he always says "I have no one else to talk about these things with." I want to yell, "What about your girlfriend??" But I hold back. He asked me out for coffee. In two and a half weeks. I've stopped eating because I want to be thinner than his girlfriend when I see him next. He literally ****ing threw my appetite out the window. We've know each other since kindergarten and were best friends for such a long, long time. We'd been through so much together. And now this girl who's known him all of 15 months gets him. But she doesn't listen to the same music as him or share his beliefs about the world or play chess and do 1000 piece puzzles with him. Instead she takes selfies and sometimes forces him in one and puts them on Facebook. I'm clueless. After 15 years with me and the past year it's like we never even knew each other except when he decides to care. Please help me go back to NC. Please. Link to post Share on other sites
blackcat777 Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 Please love yourself enough to eat. I know what it feels like to feel so sick from heartache that you can't eat anything, but do take care to make sure you're getting some kind of nourishment because the long-term effects of starvation will take a terrible toll on your health. I lived on breakfast food exclusively for the first month because it didn't take more than five minutes to prepare (although, I will never eat our favorite granola again... I'm still tempted to take the last two bags I have and bury them, err). As for the common interests, he made his decision and now he can live with it. Stay NC for your own well-being. I'm sorry it hurts so much. Big hug. Link to post Share on other sites
Dontfindme Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 Block him. Stop comparing yourself to her. Continue to better your life for YOU. Unfortunately, no one here can go over to you and do all of these things for you. You're going to have to muster the motivation to be able to do this for yourself. I'm sure that if you were guaranteed your relationship back, and all you had to do, to get it back was to make sure you were: being healthy, getting proper sleep, eating properly, exercising, focusing on work/school, spending quality time with friends and family you would do them. Why? Because you're letting him lead. You're putting him above yourself. Stop doing that. All of the aforementioned things, if you did for yourself, you would feel so much better. And it will allow for better, more positive things & people to enter (and hopefully remain) in your life. Link to post Share on other sites
herself Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 A week or so ago my ex reached out to me and asked for money. I posted about it and a few of you were really nice and supportive. But since then my ex has apologized and continuously texts me and has called a couple of times. I was on NC. And oh my God, I wish I hadn't broke it. I should have ignore the phone call. Four months of progress just vanished. He talks to me about deep things and our favorite books and music and he always says "I have no one else to talk about these things with." I want to yell, "What about your girlfriend??" But I hold back. He asked me out for coffee. In two and a half weeks. I've stopped eating because I want to be thinner than his girlfriend when I see him next. He literally ****ing threw my appetite out the window. We've know each other since kindergarten and were best friends for such a long, long time. We'd been through so much together. And now this girl who's known him all of 15 months gets him. But she doesn't listen to the same music as him or share his beliefs about the world or play chess and do 1000 piece puzzles with him. Instead she takes selfies and sometimes forces him in one and puts them on Facebook. I'm clueless. After 15 years with me and the past year it's like we never even knew each other except when he decides to care. Please help me go back to NC. Please. I can tell you this. It isnt NC without blocking. I can also tell you even if you were 50 lbs heavier than his gf what he likes in you is your mind. The thing that will make it easier is...know that if YOU were his gf...do you see he has no problem secretly contacting someone else? (You) He would do the same to you...if you got together he would message the ex. This isn't worth your time. He doesn't just get to drop you then pick you back up when its convenient. He made a choice. Then you made yours to take control and go nc. So you spoke to him once. He called YOU. So your progress is still in place and now he no longer gets to have his friend to share music and literature. He no longer gets coffee dates. Its all or nothing so give him NOTHING. Block him now and don't look back. I know you care so its easier said than done but you wont care down the road. Your gonna be just fine. You already made it 4 months...thats huge...just think how much more self respect and self esteem you will have in another 4!! She gets him? She can HAVE him...hes a two timing scumbag!! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Ducky71 Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 Four months is a good long time for NC, me thinks you need closure. Make your choice and stick to it otherwise, this wound will never heal. Link to post Share on other sites
lostsoul6486 Posted October 16, 2014 Share Posted October 16, 2014 Read the book It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken It's pretty funny and it'll help you realize you could do better than a guy who has you as his girl on the side Link to post Share on other sites
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