MistaYates Posted October 14, 2014 Posted October 14, 2014 I dated this girl for 6 months. She swore she was over her ex that she dated for 3 years. Obviously, i knew after 3 years, nobody truly would get over someone that fast. (She started talking to me after 3 DAYS of their breakup. Wow.) She told me to quit worrying and she loved me, and she broke it off with him for me. The thing is, they talked almost everyday on the phone.. I hated it. I told her to quit, and she said OK, week later, they were talking again. I broke up with her 5 TIMES over this sht. I kept getting back with her b/c i felt guilty for not trusting her. But it killed me because i didnt want her to cheat eventually. So the 4th time she begged for me back and i said fine. We broke up again, and i find a WEEK after our breakup, she was spending the night with the ex boyfriend. Called her phone, she said a few words, then made the ex talk to me. She wouldnt even talk to me... Like really? If you were in love with him this whole time, and all of our issues in our relationship were about you talking to him, and still may have a thing for him.. Then why not let me know, and spare me the feelings and torment? But nope, she had to keep going with the relationship. Why wouldnt she just tell me? I feel terrible.. Im sitting here, while shes out fking her ex boyfriend. First girl i ever loved, and i did everything with for the first time. I'm 20 and shes 17. I just feel that maybe i wasnt insertive enough or mean enough or whatever he did, must have been better..
preraph Posted October 14, 2014 Posted October 14, 2014 She did you wrong. It's not your fault. She had no business dating feeling as she did and staying that involved with her ex. I'm sorry it happened to you. Cut her off and show her breaking up is correctly done. 2
ExpatInItaly Posted October 14, 2014 Posted October 14, 2014 You didn't do anything wrong, other than take her back the first 4 times. 3
Assasda Posted October 14, 2014 Posted October 14, 2014 hahaha you were in love with her??? Dude she has 0 respect for you. A girl cant love you if she doesnt respect you. What you need to do is keep your word, stop being a doormat
Author MistaYates Posted October 14, 2014 Author Posted October 14, 2014 hahaha you were in love with her??? Dude she has 0 respect for you. A girl cant love you if she doesnt respect you. What you need to do is keep your word, stop being a doormat I know. She came to me in the beginning. All i did was give her a chance.. She cried for me back every time. She was my first love and i fell hard and quick for her.. It sucks.
preraph Posted October 14, 2014 Posted October 14, 2014 I'm so sorry. I know you were just going into it giving her the benefit of the doubt. Trouble is not many people are behaving rationally right after a breakup. And in her case, she just stayed involved, which wasn't fair to you. She shouldn't have done that. I know it's not any consolation to know that every one of us gets our hearts broken and done wrong eventually, but at least you're not alone in that. 1
slizl Posted October 14, 2014 Posted October 14, 2014 Look on the bright side, at least you aren't breaking the law by banging a 17 year old minor anymore . No Megan's list for this guy! 1
Author MistaYates Posted October 15, 2014 Author Posted October 15, 2014 Look on the bright side, at least you aren't breaking the law by banging a 17 year old minor anymore . No Megan's list for this guy! Hahahaha nope! Its legal now!
d0nnivain Posted October 15, 2014 Posted October 15, 2014 17 year old girls who still talk to their EX BFs are most probably going to sleep with said EX. You knew all this. You tried to set boundaries. You broke up 5 times over this. Here's a hint -- don't go backwards in life. One break up is one too many for a healthy relationship. Even if you get back together, let a second break up stick because the relationship was fundamentally flawed. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. You kind of did this to yourself for not believing the writing on the wall. 1
Author MistaYates Posted October 15, 2014 Author Posted October 15, 2014 17 year old girls who still talk to their EX BFs are most probably going to sleep with said EX. You knew all this. You tried to set boundaries. You broke up 5 times over this. Here's a hint -- don't go backwards in life. One break up is one too many for a healthy relationship. Even if you get back together, let a second break up stick because the relationship was fundamentally flawed. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. You kind of did this to yourself for not believing the writing on the wall. I agree completely. I know man. Its hard though when you fall so hard for someone. Especially her being my first love.. I trusted her when i shouldnt of, because i loved her too much. It kills me. Is it a mean thing what she did? A week later and already sleeping with her ex? I dumped her because of how she was talking to him so much, and the one guy that screwed everything up for us, shes already sleeping with.. I keep blaming myself for not being assertive enough. Maybe i should've been meaner.
ExpatInItaly Posted October 15, 2014 Posted October 15, 2014 I agree completely. I know man. Its hard though when you fall so hard for someone. Especially her being my first love.. I trusted her when i shouldnt of, because i loved her too much. It kills me. Is it a mean thing what she did? A week later and already sleeping with her ex? I dumped her because of how she was talking to him so much, and the one guy that screwed everything up for us, shes already sleeping with.. I keep blaming myself for not being assertive enough. Maybe i should've been meaner. No. She screwed it up by continuing to keep him in her life. You screwed up by not having higher standards and walking away the first time. Being meaner wouldn't have changed a darn thing.
d0nnivain Posted October 15, 2014 Posted October 15, 2014 I don't know that it's mean because I doubt she was intentionally trying to hurt you. I think was immature but . . .. . . I can't say mean. No you should have not been meaner. You should have been more willing to stick to your guns the 1st or 2nd time you broke up instead of taking her back. 1
Author MistaYates Posted October 15, 2014 Author Posted October 15, 2014 No. She screwed it up by continuing to keep him in her life. You screwed up by not having higher standards and walking away the first time. Being meaner wouldn't have changed a darn thing. Yeah i know. I should. But she approached me in the beginning. I was flattered, because i never had that happen to me before.. Especially with a girl that was as beautiful as her. I was so flattered, i jumped right in. It was a mistake. I knew from the beginning.. She told me she talked to her ex, and she refused to quit. She made the excuse, "You expect me to just throw someone out of my life that I've known for 3 years?"
d0nnivain Posted October 15, 2014 Posted October 15, 2014 "You expect me to just throw someone out of my life that I've known for 3 years?" throw him out of your life forever -- no. Stop talking to him every day in the immediate aftermath of your break up, absolutely. 1
Author MistaYates Posted October 16, 2014 Author Posted October 16, 2014 throw him out of your life forever -- no. Stop talking to him every day in the immediate aftermath of your break up, absolutely. And that is why she couldnt deal with it.
Author MistaYates Posted October 18, 2014 Author Posted October 18, 2014 How do i stop picturing her having sex with another guy? It kills me to know that the body i shared my first experience with, has already went back to another guy within a week... I hate this feeling. Its not fair for people like me to deserve this type of pain.. I gave her everything..
HereNorThere Posted October 18, 2014 Posted October 18, 2014 How do i stop picturing her having sex with another guy? It kills me to know that the body i shared my first experience with, has already went back to another guy within a week... I hate this feeling. Its not fair for people like me to deserve this type of pain.. I gave her everything.. You have to fight the thoughts by purposely forcing them out of your mind. Google cognitive behavioral therapy, rumination, intrusive thoughts, etc. and learn techniques. And dude, you didn't give her everything. She's 17, you weren't going to end up riding off into the sunset with her. Truth is, she'd be running right back to you if you weren't so submissive to her. 17 year old chicks don't make the worlds healthiest decisions. Be happy you got yours, work on your game, and upgrade that bish.
Author MistaYates Posted October 19, 2014 Author Posted October 19, 2014 You have to fight the thoughts by purposely forcing them out of your mind. Google cognitive behavioral therapy, rumination, intrusive thoughts, etc. and learn techniques. And dude, you didn't give her everything. She's 17, you weren't going to end up riding off into the sunset with her. Truth is, she'd be running right back to you if you weren't so submissive to her. 17 year old chicks don't make the worlds healthiest decisions. Be happy you got yours, work on your game, and upgrade that bish. She already has ran back to me. Multiple times. I was just stupid enough to take her back. The only reason she hasnt this time, is because i caught the bitch at the ex boyfriends house one night. Im sure she knows she cant come back now, because she knows what she did was wrong. But she also has him now too, so she doesnt even have to.
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