check202 Posted October 13, 2014 Posted October 13, 2014 (edited) Good morning folks, **This will be a long story so I recommend a nice coffee (x2) and tim tams(Choc biscuits for the Americans** I am writing this post albeit delirious, lost and confused. Please forgive my shocking English writing; I know it isn’t the best but I’ll do the best I can. Just be pre-warned my explanation skills aren’t exactly top class so much so they do require a little patience. For privacy sake I’ll refer to her as “Conundrum”. I think this is a rather suiting name but I’m sure you will be able to come up with a more suitable name by the end of the story. My name as posted in here will be Joe. So this is a story about Joe and conundrum. This story starts when Joe and Conundrum were 14. Joe had recently left his family and living with a friend he had recently met with no family contact. Concundrum was living with her family in what some could describe as typical sibling rivalry and the issues that came with that. Joe and Conundrum live in Sydney, Australia presently but Conundrum did live in Melbourne (600miles or 1000km away from Sydney or 11 hours Highway road trip away) Here is my story… I met Conundrum back in 2002 over a good old social chatting median called ICQ. (For those that are unaware what that is; thinking of MSN, Whatsapp, Viber, Skype etc.) Conundrum was living in Melbourne and I was living in Sydney. We found an instant connection and many common grounds and as such stayed many nights till the sun rose again. Maybe it was a picturesque child vision of love but nonetheless we stood strong and knew this connection could never be broken. We were destined to be a part of each others life for eternity. After about two years of solid communication we let our own live intervene and distract each other from the friendship we had formed. The distance was too hard to overcome at that particular time given the distance and that by this stage we were only 16. As such communication slowly faded and we wouldn’t speak again for what felt like an eternity. Fast forward 8 years.. I found conundrum on Facebook. I started talking to conundrum and whilst the conversation was slow moving initially it quickly grew to what it had came before. We were learning about were we have been, what life has thrown at us and how we were doing with life. Turns out in my life; I’d recently gone through a rather rough relationship whereby I lost a child of my own due to unforeseeable circumstances. Which just briefly to explain the mother took the child for her scam charity whereby my child was only needed so she could raise her monitory value by protesting she is the single battling mother. My part to do with the child would hinder this and as such she had the money to pay the legal costs to refute my any doing with the child. From fighting for the child through with what can only be describes as a bull**** court system in Australia; I had to sell the I.T business I created when I was 18. So foreclose my life was in absolute turmoil, I was lost, battered and bruised. Still learning that evil process of who is really your friend; most especially when you have no money left your name. (Ouch!) Turns out in her life; Conundrum was in a really rough relationship with a douchebag that had only taken her out only once over the 6 years they were together. He raped her, beat her to the ground which then to top it of. Conundrum had recently been diagnosed with a brain tumour. Which by now you’re thinking; could this be any worse? Well yes it was; Conundrums family had disowned her for dating a Western male. (No prizes for guessing Conundrums race). I’ve kept this brief as the very few words here would lead people to conclude the obvious state of her life at that time. So lets get back to talking on Facebook.. So here we are talking on Facebook.. Talking about our lives and that maybe we should of never left each others company and we were better when we were together. I suggested to her that perhaps this might be destiny but who are we to question it; why not try this road and see where it leads. As such I offered to take her back to Sydney, a place which she can call her home that no one can ever take of her and to do my utmost to help her with this brain tumour operation. Which just to close of; Conundrum had none of those in progression / possession in Melbourne. Anyways, I drive all the way to Melbourne; sit down with her and have one last talk with her. Explaining to her specially that isn’t a cure for what has happened, this is not going to be an easy road but a rough road that does have the light at the end of the tunnel if we both work at it together. Conundrum appeared to be happy with an opportunity to move forward and was eager to start a new chapter in her life. I took her to a friends place half way towards Sydney who had a long term stable relationship of their own and 3 amazing children. Conundrum loved her time there but it was only temporary till such stages I setup a place for myself and her in Sydney. You see I didn’t want her to feel anymore instability in the setup process and felt the time there was best suited so she had some understanding how a normal family operates with the distraction of 3 children under the age of ten. Two weeks later I had setup a place in Sydney and drove down to see her. We spent the night together there and things were going really well. We felt closer than what we have ever felt before. We both felt this is the life that we should of chosen all those years ago. ( Now I’m going to try and keep it brief from here on in as I could pretty much write a book if I kept going and going. So if there is any parts you have questions please do not hold back in asking. ) We drove to Sydney and moved into a lovely two bedroom apartment in Sydney. I helped her with her brain tumour operation and spent the remainder of my savings to ensure that happened in the quickest possible time frame considering the outlook looked quite bleak given what the doctors / professors had said about the condition. We had our own issues as any relationship did but for the most part we were really going well. Well; that lasted about 2 years till such stages it was clear Conundrum had formed a few mental problems after the brain tumour operation. Which effected her own better judgement and as such she lost any grounding that she had formed over the two years. I did my absolute best to try and give her all the support she needed but it became too much. I needed to ensure I was sane to be able to help her. Her loose groundings were effecting me too greatly. It grow to such extents that the later parts of those 2 years she had attempted sucide in excess of 8 times; been in and out of mental facilities. In the last month of living together she sent me a text message one night telling me that she was gang raped and is currently in hospital. I have to be hones with you; this is not a message I would want anyone to find. This is beyond heart breaking I can be fruitfully honest. None the less; she had been offered emergency accommodation when it was time for her to leave the hospital. The notice for the foreclosure of the lease on the apartment had be handed in. It was discussed with her that maybe it is best she take the emergency accommodation and find her own place. I told her I would always be there for her but she needed to find her own way in life and not become reliant on me finding the answers for her. This for obvious reasons didn’t go down too well but she did end up staying in emergency accommodation. Conundrum didn’t find a place in the time before the Emergency accommodation run out but had found a place to stay with friends till she did find a place of her own. Which for the most part went all well. Conundrum is at this part now living on her own. Finding her own groundings and direction in life which from what I could see, she was doing extremely well. Conundrum had made a good female friend in the apartment complex and to be honest I felt great knowing she was doing well for herself. This was all short lived however; as after about 4 months of her living on her own I found she had been talking to people on dating applications in her spare time. Whilst I didn’t have any issue with this as I wanted her to be happy in life. I knew that something wasn’t quite right. The way she kept secretive and really changed character gave of huge alarm bells. Then one night whilst talking over text message; she tells me she is going to be evicted from her property as she hasn’t been able to pay rent. I was thinking; oh my goodness I hope this isn’t going to be too bad. Well; when I called the real estate I found out they in no way willing to offer any empathetic solution despite me pleading with them and explaining that this issue would never happen again as I would guarantee the rent. Which considering the rent was 8 weeks behind I really couldn’t really blame the real estate for their grounded views. (Perhaps a silly move on my part but I really wanted her to be happy and didn’t want her to go back to the way that she was before) I explained to Conundrum the outcome and suggested that she find a place of her to move into as soon as possible. Conundrum appeared to understand this and I believed that she was going to make a good effort to try and correct her mistakes by finding a place and ensure that she stayed on top of her rent payments in future. Well this didn’t exactly go to plan. Turned out she moved in with one of the guys she was speaking with on the dating application. I have to say I was extremely sceptical of the legitimacy of this as when I met the both of them together; there was no intimacy, no closeness, very little conversation and to be frank it appeared to suspiciously ungenuine. I offered to Conundrum that maybe after this time apart we should work on being back together again. Conundrum immediately sparked up over this suggestion as if it was something that she was waiting for me to ask her. So it was agreed that this time we go a little bit more slowly and see where fate takes us. About 3 months into her living there. We are going really well. Well so I thought; until I saw that she had married the guy she was living with. I was absolutely gutted. I questioned her why they got married when she was pursuing a relationship with myself. Conundrum wanted me to know she was just helping him with his immigration process and that there wasn’t anything behind it. However still to this day I cannot understand the betrayal and how she could of gone behind my back to marry this guy and keep it from me for months. Conundrum kept the secret so well that it has left me with this feeling that I can no longer trust Conundrum. (<<That sounds like an oxymoron) After this me and Conundrum didn’t get along very well for quite some time. They continued to live together. I went to try and find happiness through other means with two short relationships. One for about 3 months and the other for 9 months. Which all failed as I still couldn't get over Conundrum. Which now leads me to 8 months ago when me and Conundrum started speaking again and wanted to give it a go for a third time. So I setup a place again for just me and Conundrum. Things were never how they were all those years ago. One could easily conclude that things were too far gone. Yet I prevailed and put on a smile and lived in this false hope that things were going to change and the good old days where going to make a return. Yet that never happened. You see in the beginning of giving me and Conundrum a third go she had to undergo chemotherapy to remove parts they could not remove from the initial surgery. Something that was unable to afford without my assistance / help. This place a big strain on me and our relationship alongside what I could only see were a mountain of trust issues. Two months ago Conundrum moved out as I couldn’t handle the trust issues and strain anymore. I felt like what we did have has all disappeared. Shortly after Conundrum moved out. I got this text message from her mobile/cell number stating it was her sister and that Conundrum had passed away in hospital. Alongside this, the text message went on to say she was 14 weeks pregnant. For the love of christ my heart sunk and all the moments from the past started rushing back. I want to make sure that this information was correct. I wanted to be there for her. I left work in a complete ruin and told the unsympathetic boss an almightily amount of colourful words for his lack of empathy for the situation I was currently placed in. Some 6 hours later; what felt like 10 billion phone calls back and forth. As well as receiving a call from work telling me I am fired. I find out the message is a hoax. (Confirmed by the coroners office) I was furious and who wouldn’t be. I wanted to speak with Conundrum to find out why on earth she could play such an insidiously low act. All attempts to contact her failed. **To be continued** I’ll be writing this in parts over the next 2 days (This is about 2500 words to date; the full story once finish will be 5-8000 words) PS: For those 37ish people that have viewed this.. I know there are spelling errors galore. These will be fixed once I have finished the story. Edited October 13, 2014 by check202
Author check202 Posted October 13, 2014 Author Posted October 13, 2014 As this forum somehow lost about 1500 words.. I’ve lost all effort in continuing this post. However to close of.. Conundrum has recently faked the death of the child and now refusing for me to be there for the child. I would of ended better but with about 1500 words going missing.. It’s killed my effort to finish this post. Thank you for all those that have read this. (I can no longer edit my post.)
Noproblem Posted October 13, 2014 Posted October 13, 2014 Your story makes me angry Very angry I feel sorry for you But at the same time very angry at you. You wasted years and years of your life perusing a dream a girl that you only loved form one side only and she only saw you as a rescuer She used you and used you, and used you again and you kept on letting her using you instead of building a better life, finding a real therapy that can take you of this madness Because you are truly mad mad in love with a dream a fantasy that is never really You are no 28 you still have to let go Leave her for good I am sorry that she is sick and all, but she is a liar and she is been using you for years. You have to let her go no friendships, no contact, no checking on her facbook, dating site Nothing NO Contact Try to leave Sydney for a while she is sick but trust me on this you are sick too Because you can't let go of her love. You have to think about you now You are good honest loyal man You don't deserve this you don't deserve to be taken as a fool. Stop this obsessiveness! Go and free yourself Best of luck in your next chapter of your life Remember, next time try to find person that doesn't need to be fixed! 2
quidproquo89 Posted October 13, 2014 Posted October 13, 2014 bloody hell, you poor man. That is a mountain of sorrow and angst right there. Firstly you must know that woman is bad news. She's a liar, manipulative, immature and highly untrustworthy. No matter how hard it is, you must move on from having feelings for this woman. Try to be there for the child if it is yours. But you've got to move on for your mental health, sticking with her is going to bring you down. Can you explain and get your job back? I am truly sorry. I'd say notice the red flags in future and don't let things get so far in future. 1
Author check202 Posted October 13, 2014 Author Posted October 13, 2014 Thank you for the reply. I think that is somewhat the advice that I need really. I know I have to let go. I have to for my own sanity. It's just soo difficult but it is about time in my life I take some serious intervention and put a stop to this cr ap if I can use that word. For the other reply.. No I can't get my job back and wouldn't want that job back. At the moment I'm returning back to study and changing careers. 1
Noproblem Posted October 15, 2014 Posted October 15, 2014 Thank you for the reply. I think that is somewhat the advice that I need really. I know I have to let go. I have to for my own sanity. It's just soo difficult but it is about time in my life I take some serious intervention and put a stop to this cr ap if I can use that word. For the other reply.. No I can't get my job back and wouldn't want that job back. At the moment I'm returning back to study and changing careers. Best luck with that, you deserve all the luck you can get. a change in studying and career will do you good <3
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