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Almost a year after breakup

acidios

By acidios
in Coping

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acidios Member

acidios

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In 10 days(22 of the month) it will be a year from the BU so i want to share some of my feelings and thoughts.

 

 

about the relationship.in few words we where together for 6 years she broke up with me.

 

 

now the most important question and answer..NO!.i am not healed yet...i miss her,i am thinking about her and i am still getting those bad dreams and wake up mornings that make your day feel like a nightmare.

 

 

if i want to be together with her again?. NO!.i have completely accept that she is not the right "person" for me.

the reason that i have accepted that she is not for me is that i had dates with other girls and even if dint feel attraction for them,i had great momments and i enjoyed their company.i have realised and i know that somewere out there,there is a girl that will make me jump in the air like a little kid from joy when i meet her and that makes me happy.

 

 

did she made a move?,or a call?,of a fire signal?. NO! she is completely gone!.no signs of life after my last mistake of breaking nc.even before i broke my nc she dint called or showed something.also both me and her we have blocks on facebook on eachother..and thats all.

 

 

what she doing now?. i dont care! and i dont want to know.

 

 

what my friends and family say about?.well i dont talk enymore with them about it.i feel that is something that i must fight alone and i feel the need to fight it alone in a way.

after the day that i broke my nc i did a plan and i follow that plan everyday.

i face everyday different and when a holiday or a important date comes that i have memories good or bad with her,i try to be more active than ever,even if i am alone and i cant meet with my friends.i am goin for walks,riding my car even if i have nowhere to go,playing video games,and other things.

 

how generally feels after a year?. well in a way i feel that i lost a year of my life for a person that dont deserve enything from me.on the other side is not easy at all to get rid the memmories and feelings that you have and allways you will get hits under the belt,but if you stay focused things are getting better its a endurance fight one that you will need to face with all your strength and NC is the best weapon that you got.

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