Gloria25 Posted October 11, 2014 Posted October 11, 2014 Ok, I'm in my 30's and cuz of my commitment issues, I haven't been able to meet someone who will stay with me long because the RL doesn't evolve into "something" (marriage and/or kids)...and, I'm independent. I usually joke and say that I'd just get married at this point so that I can have a regular sex partner...I mean, I'm also tired of racking up numbers with each "casual" partner I get involved with. Now, I will NEVER fake wanting and/or having kids cuz I came from a broken home and do not believe in having kids just to keep a guy and/or if that is something you do not want. So, do you think that I can "fake" wanting marriage (maybe even getting married) in hopes that I can be with someone for a minute? Or, should I enter a monastery or continue with my collection of dogs and become the "crazy dog lady"?
acrosstheuniverse Posted October 11, 2014 Posted October 11, 2014 Never fake who you are. The truth will eventually come out when the cracks begin to show. There are plenty of men out there who would LOVE to be with a woman who is happy with a long term partnership and does not want to get married or have children. Not everybody wants those things. Especially at your age, most people have figured out whether they want those things or not and had enough time to give serious consideration to pursuing them. So you're not likely to meet guys who think they can handle a non married relationship and then realise they need wedding bells. Pretending you want to be married just to achieve a long term relationship is the most stupidest thing I've ever heard, btw. You wouldn't be able to play along and fake it for that long. 2
Lurkeraspect Posted October 11, 2014 Posted October 11, 2014 Perhaps get into therapy and work on your intimacy/commitment issues. No one can "fix" you, but yourself. And, no. You don't fake marry, or fake wanting kids. I'd just stop dating or hooking up until you get therapy and work on your issues.
WomenWubber Posted October 11, 2014 Posted October 11, 2014 Technically, you could as long they don't figure it out. But do you really want to be in a rl where you can't express yourself? Do you feel that lonely? Or is it desperation? How about looking for a partner who shares your view of marriage? It's not unheard of, you know?
Tayken Posted October 11, 2014 Posted October 11, 2014 Sadly as it might sound @OP, you are right some women unilaterally have kids in hope that they will keep the man, and that is just a ridiculous way of going about things. You might get child support, but the man doesn't need to stay with you...just look around. I know there is a ubiquitous saying "you have to fake it, to make it", but that only applies in the movies as opposed to reality. If a woman is faking it, I am bound to suss her out.
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