mircaleoszi Posted October 9, 2014 Posted October 9, 2014 I've been dating a guy for 4 months now. It is hard for me to understand what is going on. He is giving me mixed messages. One day he says that he doesn't love me and I'm not the "right" one for him, then he calls and wants to see me every day. We also met each other's parents. What should I do? (He's a widower in his mid-thirties)
Gaeta Posted October 9, 2014 Posted October 9, 2014 One day he says that he doesn't love me and I'm not the "right" one for him It would end there for me. If after 4 months of dating I was told to my face I am not the one and I am not right for him, I would terminate it. There is a difference between 'I don't know yet if you're the one' and 'you're not the one'. , then he calls and wants to see me every day. We also met each other's parents. What should I do? (He's a widower in his mid-thirties) He calls you cause he's lonely. He is using you as a band-aid, something to fill the void. Do yourself a favor and move on. 5
Dork Vader Posted October 9, 2014 Posted October 9, 2014 Move on.. When a guy cares about you he wont have doubts about it. He wont question it and he wont flip flop. If he does, it means he is either not emotionally stable or not that into you. You need to move on with your life, he's likely not emotionally stable due to the fact that he is a widower. 2
Beautiful Kisses Posted October 10, 2014 Posted October 10, 2014 He told you you're not the one for him. That's it, no need to keep talking to him. I know it might be hard.
Poppygoodwill Posted October 10, 2014 Posted October 10, 2014 Actually, he's not really sending mixed signals. He's doing what's easy. He's been honest with you by telling you that you're not someone he will get very serious about. The fact that he still calls you is because he's having a 'good enough' time in your company. His conscience is clear, because he was honest with you, and now he's just hanging out with you. If you were to misconstrue this as him being genuinely interested in you despite what he's said, then you will be in for a big disappointment. And he'll be surprised that you're mad at him. "But I told you how I felt!" he'll say. If you enjoy hanging with him, then continue to do so, but with no illusions that it will lead to something serious. If you are intent on finding a serious relationship, then now it's time to move on because you'll just be wasting your time with him. As Maya Angelou said, "When people tell you who they are, believe them." 4
what_a_blonde Posted October 10, 2014 Posted October 10, 2014 It would end there for me. If after 4 months of dating I was told to my face I am not the one and I am not right for him, I would terminate it. There is a difference between 'I don't know yet if you're the one' and 'you're not the one'. He calls you cause he's lonely. He is using you as a band-aid, something to fill the void. Do yourself a favor and move on. This exactly.^^^ As hard as it may be to swallow it, he's just keeping you around until something better comes along. Guys that are really interested in you won't chance it and will hold on to you for all they can. This on/off crap that he is pulling shows he could easily live without you... the problem is he knows you're hooked which is why he continues to do this stuff.. he gets away with it. He's not worth it, please...DROP HIM. 1
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