iamfrustrated Posted March 9, 2005 Posted March 9, 2005 Hi there I met the most amazing woman ever about two tears ago. We were friends for about a year , she told me she liked it like that ,"friends". Then we started dating ,but she was always hestitant though . Always got the feeling she was looking to get away. Other than that we had an awesome time together , we had everything in common and had a lot of fun together. After 3 months she breaks up with me , gave some excuse about not wanting to be involved with problems in my life. Three weeks later she asks me back , and we spent a couple of nights together then she stats to avoid me. She breaks up with me again , this time another excuse. Three weeks later we are hanging out again as "friends" she would rub my leg, touchg me and rest her head on me.Then one day I pour all my feelings out to her ,she tells me she is not interested in me anymore , but asks me out two days later. This time she was holding my hand for the first time in two months.we hung out a few after,times with lots of intamacy. We went on a camping trip with other friends.After the trip she started to avoid me again. Called to ask her why, she told me she was uncomfortable around me ,she said she told me she was not interested in me and did not want to lead me on. Two months of NC I sent her a Bday card, she loved and asked me out a couple of times. We were getting along great .We talked for hours and flirted with each other. We talked about doing things again in the future. We went camping again. After camping she started to avoid me again. I caled her up she said I was cold to her friend at the camping trip abd it mede her uncomfortable arpund me. Why does she constantly run away from me?I have never pressured her , never once mentioned relationship,always took things real slow.She told me that I was different than other guys . Any ideas? Thanks
westernxer Posted March 9, 2005 Posted March 9, 2005 She likes the thrill but not the spoils. You're making it too easy for her by being compliant, so she drops you when she's had her fill. I don't think she wants you on a long-term basis, but she can't find anyone else so she settles for you just to occupy her time. You should just think of her as a one-night stand and leave after the deed is done. Or just stay away from her altogether. The element of surprise will definitely get to her, because, clearly, she doesn't respect you. Don't give in so easily. Make her earn your respect. Because, right now, she doesn't respect you.
SuperFantastico Posted March 10, 2005 Posted March 10, 2005 Next time she trys that ...stuff... tell her to go F herself. Belive me this will work wonders. Shes testing you. Seeing how much she can get away with. how much she can use you. Its real simple. Put your foot down, dont breakdown. a) she will get put in her place and be your little loveslave. b) she really will f-off and you will be done with her games. And if she keeps it up afterwards, just do it again till she gets the point. You give an inch, she takes a mile. Dont be afraid. P.S. Oh and i mean quite literally tell her to 'f-her self' dont go, oh dont do that, your hurting me...blah blah balh. no say to her ' go f-yourself!' and then leave. If she asks you to repeat yourself, tell it to her again. If you cant tell, i really dont like people playing games like this. I know how it can hurt, but i know how to deal with it too.
westernxer Posted March 10, 2005 Posted March 10, 2005 tell her to go F herself I like this answer better. ¡SuperFantastico es super fantástico!
iamfrustrated Posted March 10, 2005 Posted March 10, 2005 excellant aconseje, gracias Senior Super Fantastico neccesito los huevos!!
ReluctantRomeo Posted March 10, 2005 Posted March 10, 2005 Originally posted by iamfrustrated excellant aconseje, gracias Senior Super Fantastico neccesito los huevos!! Falta de heuvos - problema de nuestro tiempo
pat5318 Posted March 14, 2005 Posted March 14, 2005 It really seems like this girl is no good for you. I think that if you aren't happy with the situation that you are in just let her know. give her a taste of her own medicine. Start playing all of the games she has played with you on her. See if she likes it...I guarantee she won't. The worst thing that could happen if you do that is you won't be with her anymore, and that might not be that bad. The best thing that is goin to happen is you will get all the power back in the relationship and she will be the one pineing over you. You got it Dude make it happen
WithOrWithoutYou Posted March 17, 2005 Posted March 17, 2005 It sounds to me a lot like this girl really likes you - as a friend - but also likes using you for sex. Yet when that happens, she reminds herself (because a long time ago she decided for reasons you will never know) that you are not "boyfriend material". This would explain the lame excuses for breaking it off with you every time you become intimate. 3 options I can see: 1. Play games and play hard to get, discard HER after your time together, tell her where to get off, etc. etc. (I don't like to play games myself, so I don't, but up to you). If you do this, what the other poster said will probably happen - she will either get really into you really fast, or it will be OVER. Keep in mind though, that your relationship will always be based on games (you playing, and her playing), if you do this. That is why I choose not to operate this way. 2. Acknolwedge to yourself what it is, and just enjoy the time you spend with her (in a FWB, one-night-stand, fun camping trip here and there kind of context), while holding onto your heart IF you can do that. 3. Acknowledge to yourself that she is messing with your head (intentionally or unintentionally), and avoid her at all costs. Move on with your life, and find someone who is into you enough to actually have a relationship.
HoldOn Posted March 17, 2005 Posted March 17, 2005 Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Whoa, this girl has fooled you how many times? Sorry, man. I'm sure there's some girl out there who is just normal.
ReluctantRomeo Posted March 17, 2005 Posted March 17, 2005 Originally posted by HoldOn I'm sure there's some girl out there who is just normal. Where? I'm sure we'd have heard about her on CNN But yes, I agree. She's playing games, move on before you get hurt again.
HoldOn Posted March 17, 2005 Posted March 17, 2005 Where? I'm sure we'd have heard about her on CNN Ha! Here's the thing. People get hung up on a crazy person for months or years, and then they are not available to find a normal partner. Because they are at home waiting for their crazy gf or bf to call and tell them they want them back. They should be out looking for the normal person!
ReluctantRomeo Posted March 18, 2005 Posted March 18, 2005 Originally posted by HoldOn Here's the thing. People get hung up on a crazy person for months or years, and then they are not available to find a normal partner. Because they are at home waiting for their crazy gf or bf to call and tell them they want them back. Good quote. Mind if I borrow it?
iamfrustrated Posted March 19, 2005 Posted March 19, 2005 Originally posted by WithOrWithoutYou It sounds to me a lot like this girl really likes you - as a friend - but also likes using you for sex. . We never had sex , the very first time I kissed her the first thing she said was "dont expect your dry spell to end". We would make out and do evrything else but no intercourse . She told me she really appreciated me taking things slow. I knew she was not completly comfortable so I took thing at her pace. I was in no hurry as she WAS the most amazing woman I have ever met. BTW she is 33
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