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Sum up your terrible online dating in haiku form


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Posted

Online dating's rough

Efficiency cuts both ways

No personal touch

 

WriterGal, what's up?

A fine challenge you've thrown down!

Two entries for me.

 

I've got a lot more.

But I'd just be showing off.

So I'll stop right here.

 

I had a good time.

Maybe we'll do it again.

Sound familiar?

 

:D

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Posted

I sent him a wink

he replied with a message

"do you do anal?"

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Posted

Fisher and a fish

Never a tug on my line

Starving cannibal

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Posted

She drove down to me

says I'm sweet and a fun guy

then she friendzones me.

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Posted

Drinking too much wine,

She became honey badger,

I dodged a bullet.

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Posted

I drove an hour,

He texted me to cancel,

I ate lunch alone.

 

 

He's a sci fi nerd

Who just talked about Star Trek

Where's my death ray gun?

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Posted

My profile must suck.

What else could explain failure?

No emails, no winks.

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Posted

Must find some poontang

I'll text her all day and night

And blow up her phone

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Posted

Awesome haikus people. Helps to know we're all in this online dating game (a nightmare at times) together! :laugh:

 

 

Don't give up hope yet

You are all awesome people

Love will find a way! :love:

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Posted

I met a stalker.

Someone threatened to kill me.

Deactivated.

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Posted
He's a sci fi nerd

Who just talked about Star Trek

Where's my death ray gun?

 

Not a death ray gun.

It's called a phaser, my dear

What I could teach you.

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Posted

He was really hot

But all his drug felonies

Made me think twice, once.

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Posted
Not a death ray gun.

It's called a phaser, my dear

What I could teach you.

 

Teach me Obi-Wan

You're my only hope (so far)

Where is that R-2?

Posted

I dated OFF line.

Plenty of problems and fun

Then I met The One.

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Posted
I dated OFF line.

Plenty of problems and fun

Then I met The One.

 

I will try that then.

Online dating is so hard.

Where are the good guys?

Posted
Teach me Obi-Wan

You're my only hope (so far)

Where is that R-2?

 

One future, one past.

Both are from the seventies.

Star Trek, not Star Wars.

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Posted

Two captains, one ship

Kirk and then Jean Luc Piccard

Enterprise, engage.

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Posted
I will try that then.

Online dating is so hard.

Where are the good guys?

 

I'm off the market;

Still, one can't help but wonder.

Timing's everything.

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Posted

Date was going great

Until I met his GIANT dong

Couldn't walk for days

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Posted
I'm off the market;

Still, one can't help but wonder.

Timing's everything.

 

Your wife is lucky;

I think she caught a good one.

Congrats to you both.

Posted

You parked on the sidewalk

Everywhere you looked but at me

The ocean was soothing

 

 

You said I look high

No date for you jackass

You probably have VD

 

This is fun, thanks ! Some of these made me lol. (And cringe for those that suffered through them)

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Posted
You parked on the sidewalk

Everywhere you looked but at me

The ocean was soothing

 

 

You said I look high

No date for you jackass

You probably have VD

 

This is fun, thanks ! Some of these made me lol. (And cringe for those that suffered through them)

 

Yeah it is fun to share our bad online dating experiences. :laugh: There's some doozies in this thread! I feel for everyone who has posted, I really do! Keep 'em coming!

Posted

She asked me to wait

I was happy to oblige

The other guy scored.

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Posted

LOL this thread is great!

 

Sent me a message

It said "sexy ass lips gurl"

I facepalmed so hard

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Posted

Woman wants threesome

Her boyfriend would be involved

No response from me

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