SameOldFear Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 I can't believe it. I really can't. If you want more of my history you can read my previous posts. But basically he left me for someone else a year ago, after I made so many sacrifices for him. I went through a roller coaster of emotions that has plateaued these past three or four months and I've managed to keep NC. We used to work together(I got him the job), however he decided he was better than everyone and quit without telling anybody or putting in a notice and got a job somewhere else. Well he showed up to his new job high and..."an incident," as he likes to call it ensued. He got fired and is unable to get a job elsewhere. After four months of NC, though I did not expect to hear from him. He called from an unknown number and explained the situation to me and asked me for money. I was in shock at the nerve he had, but then he said, "I will pay you back." Those words set me off. I just started yelling at him. I said, "No, you won't! You have never done anything you said you would for me. I watch how you've treated your girlfriend and your other friend's this past year and I don't get any of that respect, despite doing the most for you." Then I said a few swear words and hung up the phone... I'm not sure if I did the right thing, as I'd always hoped to remain neutral and cold and emotionless towards him. But it made me so angry when he called. 2
sdrawkcaB ssA Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 I am one to say WTF! Shure give him a quarter to call family for a loan. You are not responsible for your ex. I wonder what else he will come up with if you lend money... Sex, room and board... Hell you'll be back where you started!
leavesonautumn Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 Meh, I don't think what you did was right OR wrong. It was how you responded to an obviously ridiculous request on his end. However, it's pretty much a guarauntee that he will call you at some point again to ask for some favor so good on you for making it harder for him to do just that. Next time, just try to keep it short and sweet . My ex had called about 3 months after one of our break ups a few years ago and asked for my dad's phone number. It was pretty strange but yeah sure okay, I gave him the number because I was his doormat. My dad ended up telling me that he had called to ask for advice on how to make more money. WTF, it was bizarre and I'm not sure why he felt like it would be a good idea to call his ex's dad.
whichwayisup Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 I can't believe it. I really can't. If you want more of my history you can read my previous posts. But basically he left me for someone else a year ago, after I made so many sacrifices for him. I went through a roller coaster of emotions that has plateaued these past three or four months and I've managed to keep NC. We used to work together(I got him the job), however he decided he was better than everyone and quit without telling anybody or putting in a notice and got a job somewhere else. Well he showed up to his new job high and..."an incident," as he likes to call it ensued. He got fired and is unable to get a job elsewhere. After four months of NC, though I did not expect to hear from him. He called from an unknown number and explained the situation to me and asked me for money. I was in shock at the nerve he had, but then he said, "I will pay you back." Those words set me off. I just started yelling at him. I said, "No, you won't! You have never done anything you said you would for me. I watch how you've treated your girlfriend and your other friend's this past year and I don't get any of that respect, despite doing the most for you." Then I said a few swear words and hung up the phone... I'm not sure if I did the right thing, as I'd always hoped to remain neutral and cold and emotionless towards him. But it made me so angry when he called. Oh HELL YEAH you did the right thing!! He was hoping you'd jump at the chance of helping him, taking him in, lending him money. What a jerkoff he is. He has other friends, family or even that girl he left you for last year to ask for help, to lend him money. Good on you for you letting loose on him. Bet it felt great. Don't feel bad, he isn't your problem. He treated you like crap, disrespected you, so do NOT feel guilty or worried that you yelled at him.
whichwayisup Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 Meh, I don't think what you did was right OR wrong. It was how you responded to an obviously ridiculous request on his end. However, it's pretty much a guarauntee that he will call you at some point again to ask for some favor so good on you for making it harder for him to do just that. Next time, just try to keep it short and sweet . My ex had called about 3 months after one of our break ups a few years ago and asked for my dad's phone number. It was pretty strange but yeah sure okay, I gave him the number because I was his doormat. My dad ended up telling me that he had called to ask for advice on how to make more money. WTF, it was bizarre and I'm not sure why he felt like it would be a good idea to call his ex's dad. Short and sweet? 1)Doubtful he'll ever have the balls to call her again, and 2)if he does call, why she should be sweet to him? She should tell him to F OFF and not to call again.
leavesonautumn Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 Short and sweet? 1)Doubtful he'll ever have the balls to call her again, and 2)if he does call, why she should be sweet to him? She should tell him to F OFF and not to call again. He had the balls to do it in the first place. People like this will try and try again, especially if they're desperate. Short and sweet is a saying. It means to deal with something quickly and to the point. I don't literally mean be sweet to him damn.
Dontfindme Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 OP, I think you did the right thing. Yeah, you could have been neutral, but I'm sure saying what you said, in the way you did, felt good at the moment; you got it off your chest. AND, the exchange will likely ensure that this person never reaches back out again. You don't want him to reach back out to you anyway. This man is a disaster. You deserve better.
Dontfindme Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 He had the balls to do it in the first place. People like this will try and try again, especially if they're desperate. Short and sweet is a saying. It means to deal with something quickly and to the point. I don't literally mean be sweet to him damn. Good point, if he did it once, he actually may reach out again. But I'm hoping, for OP, that this guy has SOME self-respect.
blackcat777 Posted October 9, 2014 Posted October 9, 2014 A former ex of mine, who never worked, fraudulently used my new credit information after I left him (to go on the lamest Amazon shopping spree ever... mostly streamed videos that I knew only HE would watch... My bad for not being more careful with login information!). After that, he had the nerve to ask me to sign some papers to help him save money on car insurance. *sound of my jaw hitting the floor* Some people! Good for you for standing your ground in this case.
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