katinlc Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 Does this happen to anyone else or is this just me? My boyfriend and I have been talking/dating for a couple of months and became "official" last week. Everything has been great. He is the most thoughtful, sweet, and caring guy I have ever met. He's always asking me out and plans future stuff with me, tells me how much he likes me, etc... One of the reasons I am so happy is that he has given me no reason to question him and his feelings, so I have not had the beginning of relationship insecurities I normally have and have just been happy. Even with all this, every once in a while I have what I call a "girl day". This is where I kind of freak out and become insecure, wondering where we are going, reading too much into texts, etc...He has done nothing to cause this and it doesn't happen often with me in relationships, but every once in a while. Today, I'm fine and back to happy and secure. I'm just wondering if this happens to others or is it just me? In my last relationship this happened one day and I was talking to my friend and she had the same day. She is married and has been with her husband of 5 years and was having a freak out, thought he was lying to her day (he totally wasn't). she just chalked it up to a crazy girl day and moved on. I had also googled this and found where women were saying this happened to them around their time of the month, so now I'm wondering if it just evil hormones playing their part
Lernaean_Hydra Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 Does this happen to anyone else or is this just me? Well, you kind of already answered your own question in your OP since you said that after googling you found it happens to other women too. Anyway, I'd say it's normal hormonal fluctuations in the body making you feel overly-analytical and insecure. It's kind of one of those crappy things you just have to ride out and talk yourself down from unless you're a fan of taking a toke here and there. While the little bouts of anxiety suck, just make sure you keep maintaining and don't lash out at your boyfriend or accuse him of things. 1
Author katinlc Posted October 8, 2014 Author Posted October 8, 2014 Well, you kind of already answered your own question in your OP since you said that after googling you found it happens to other women too. Haha - true...I had never thought about it or equated it to a hormonal thing until I did a google search and someone mentioned this. Guess I was looking for other people's stories of this happening to them so I know I'm not the only crazy one
sdrawkcaB ssA Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 I can testify in my LDR, as every moment we share is greatly savored within our wee time limits. I learned after a few instances, that she would go into such a mode with me. New in our relationship, I realized it was not my feelings not being properly shared. In fact it was too much at once, but she did not see it that way. Only when I gave her things about my thoughts she would turn them around, as if something she said or did not do had raised question. Time after time I would tell her so she would know my thoughts and feel that I do share her feelings so deeply. Once the newness rubbed off in the relationship, that part had settled. It does not happen overnight, in fact a few years time... But it was issues that she had kept and some secrets as well. We never side stepped the issue, even thought she threw fits about it time to time, I never backed down in explaining myself. I knew it was growing pains and her time of the month. What she did when she felt it coming along, was to take a girls day out, she would be quiet about bringing up what she felt without making matters worse, and wait it out. Plus she would do a girls day away, to get a massage, have some drinks with friends, and get her mind away from thinking too much into things. Then give me time to say what I felt again, to reassure her. She was never afraid to tell me that her feelings were at times swayed by PMS, and never backed away from wanting my honest opinion about everything. Keeping such feelings open no matter how big or small, allowed her issues and secrets to be open with me. Now such issues are gone with her PMS. It may not be much of help from a man's point of view, let alone our strange relationship, but I hope it gives some insight to how to deal with your issues time to time.
Diezel Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 As a man, trust me, a lot of us don't get it. Sometimes it's not a girl day, it's "girl days", which is why we are so awesome to suggest "PMS" even if your period ended just 4 days ago. We are smart like that.
Gloria25 Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 Well yeah, I have my "girl days", but I could see you getting annoyed at something like him leaving dirty dishes in the sink... But, at the same time, why would you think he's lying to you? What I'm trying to say is maybe your "girl day" wouldn't bring up such thoughts if you didn't already have them for a certain reason....
Assasda Posted October 9, 2014 Posted October 9, 2014 I think the "freak out" thing is absolutely normal for women. Its just a way, women test men. And they find out if the guys past the test. Just one of those things.
ComingInHot Posted October 9, 2014 Posted October 9, 2014 P.M.S. and the monthly call to arms darlin it can last a day or longer. Suggestion; write down your jacked up thoughts on paper then sit on it for 24 hours. If it is still a real concern then talk to your b/f about it* 1
isisisweeping Posted October 9, 2014 Posted October 9, 2014 I was reading something the other day calling into question whether PMS is a function of biology or sociology - that is, is it somewhat psychosomatic in that we allow it to excuse the crazy emotions we otherwise have and control because our culture tells us this? I have never had PMS and I've not had insecurities in a relationship that I could not tie directly to a certain action or behavior. Then, I've not had insecurities when in retrospect I should have, so you take the good with the bad.
Keenly Posted October 9, 2014 Posted October 9, 2014 You need to be VERY careful when these feelings pop up. You cant take words back, and you also don't get a get out of jail free card once a month. I say that because my ex would be the biggest, craziest, meanest psycho for a day and then just act like nothing happened the next day. The things she did and said still hurt. 1
CharlieFox Posted October 9, 2014 Posted October 9, 2014 I say that because my ex would be the biggest, craziest, meanest psycho for a day and then just act like nothing happened the next day. The things she did and said still hurt. Wow, that bad huh? What did she do/say? Personally, I never noticed THAT big of a change in women I was with during their periods.
Keenly Posted October 9, 2014 Posted October 9, 2014 Wow, that bad huh? What did she do/say? Personally, I never noticed THAT big of a change in women I was with during their periods. She would literally make up reasons to be angry. She still does. Even though we havent been together for two years. In April she accused me of being " such a good father " and not paying child support. I sent her a screenshot proving not only did I pay, but I paid 100 dollars more than I was supposed to. She still insisted I was a terrible person. Just made stuff up to be mad about. When we were together. Shed break up with me and then the next day act like it never happened . Just keep yourself in check when your feeling this " girl day " . Its not a hall pass.
Recommended Posts