drmrid13 Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 Hi there! So, I have posted about this individual in the past. I told him that it was too difficult for us to speak to one another, and he respected my wishes for about a month. Then, at around 3 AM, he decided to text me and tell me that he missed me and felt a longing for me. We texted back and forth for about three days, then all communication ended again (with me saying that I would like to see him again). Three months later, I decided to text him out of the blue. He decided to call me (he NEVER called me before this to have a real conversation, and we have been in communication for over a year). We had a phone conversation that lasted two hours. He was very romantic, and he stated that he wanted to be with me. The conversation ended with him promising that we would see one another soon. I was left feeling really good about things. Now, three days later, we haven't texted or called one another, and I am starting to feel not-so-good. What should I do? I am afraid I am going to fall for him all over again. I honestly have issues with feeling like I do not deserve him (my fault completely) but he does not know this. Help!
No Limit Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 You two are pushing and pulling each other with meaningless breadcrumbs - although apparently you thought his breadcrumbs were sincere. Go NC for good. If he had wanted you back he wouldn't have hesitated even a day, and he wouldn't have asked you per phone. 1
Author drmrid13 Posted October 8, 2014 Author Posted October 8, 2014 (edited) I think that what we say to each other does have meaning. Him calling was kind of a turning point to be honest, considering we had text conversations before this. I have a hard time believing it is nothing. He has told me in the past that he is afraid he can't give me what I am looking for. I don't know what I am looking for, I just know that I want to have him in my life. I just need help letting go and releasing feelings of attachment (in a lot of areas in my life). Edited October 8, 2014 by drmrid13
Zahara Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 I think that what we say to each other does have meaning. Him calling was kind of a turning point to be honest, considering we had text conversations before this. I have a hard time believing it is nothing. He has told me in the past that he is afraid he can't give me what I am looking for. I don't know what I am looking for, I just know that I want to have him in my life. I just need help letting go and releasing feelings of attachment (in a lot of areas in my life). It is breadcrumbs. It isn't nothing to you but it doesn't contain enough substance to actually mean anything of significance in terms of working through a relationship with you. If you need to let go, then the only way to do that is NC. It is evident contact doesn't render you anything but zero results and more confusion.
Author drmrid13 Posted October 8, 2014 Author Posted October 8, 2014 I can understand the concept of breadcrumbs! We are long-distance, and I don't really know what kind of relationship I want to come out of this. And trust me, the conversation we did have ¨went¨ somewhere. I guess it just makes me sad to hear that I should just go back to NC when it doesn't feel like the right thing to do for me. Should I perhaps just wait until he contacts me again? Also... He did tell me that I have been treated poorly by guys in the past, and that I deserve someone who treats me right. Not sure what that exactly means...
Zahara Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 I can understand the concept of breadcrumbs! We are long-distance, and I don't really know what kind of relationship I want to come out of this. And trust me, the conversation we did have ¨went¨ somewhere. I guess it just makes me sad to hear that I should just go back to NC when it doesn't feel like the right thing to do for me. Should I perhaps just wait until he contacts me again? Also... He did tell me that I have been treated poorly by guys in the past, and that I deserve someone who treats me right. Not sure what that exactly means... I can't see anything in what you initially posted indicating that it "went somewhere". Just words with nothing to back it up. Promising that you both will see each other soon and then silence isn't reliable. It doesn't feel right to go back to NC because you've reignited all your feelings and now you're hopeful. He's just fed a huge crumb and you're now wide eyed waiting for "soon" to come along. Yes, you deserve someone that treats you right. He isn't showing you that. There is really no reason to be romantic, tell you that he wants to be with you and then disappear for three days.
travelbug1996 Posted October 8, 2014 Posted October 8, 2014 (edited) it sounds like you've gotten emotionally attached to an unavailable person. that could potentially cause you a lot of unnecessary pain. Edited October 9, 2014 by travelbug1996
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