Montrell274 Posted March 9, 2005 Posted March 9, 2005 I have no idea whatsoever when it comes to flirting with women. I can talk and introduce myself, if I am not shy. But that's it. I don't know how to flirt or etc. I want to learn but I don't know how to learn. I'm on a campus surrounded by hundreds of women, and can't talk to any of them...
SleepingLover Posted March 9, 2005 Posted March 9, 2005 LOL .. I haven't got a problem with talking or even subtle flirting. Its the first step of asking them out or getting a number ... that's where I always freeze up
SleepingLover Posted March 9, 2005 Posted March 9, 2005 LOL as in flirting?.. boy .. I usually playfully flirt..and sometimes when I seriously flirt I'm not even aware that I'm doing it so it is hard to explain. Seriously flirting, does not need to involve any words at all. It is in how you present yourself. You could move nearer your subject, but don't stare at her, wait until a moment presents itself and catch eye contact, if you make eye contact and she locks onto your gaze even for a second, you have caught her attention and possibly inticed her. EYE CONTACT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING... I could never stress that enough; it is a show of your confidence and ...(women correct me if I'm wrong here).... they love it... If she looks away quickly, forget it.. she's not interested at all and is prolly taken. However, don't stare! Some women will think yer a freak and feel you are being rude. Now that you have inticed her or at least got her attention, you might think of something to say and not a pickup line! Instead of saying stupid overused lines like "Do you come here often?" Ack! Say something like "This is a pretty nice place here." The whole purpose is to break the ice and get her talking to you. At this point you could say something else within taste and then introduce yourself. Like I said most of my flirts when serious, are subliminal, so not sure how to explain those because I many times aren't aware of them, they involve both the eye contact method and body language. Women are very in tune to their senses more than men, so they pick up body language lickety split. For the more playful stuff, you can get more creative, but only use them on women you know a little bit. I'm in the IT profession and I work at a University in the building that houses both Nursing and Dental so I am surrounded by hundreds of beautiful women from day to day. Many whom know me on a first name basis. I have been there 12 years, so many of the women I have seen come and go. Often, when I am out, it is not uncommon for me to bump into them regularly any where I go. Many of them flirt with me so I playfully flirt back. One of my little lines, cause they know what I do for a living, is "Baby, why dontcha invite me over to your place and lemme buff yer harddrive".. LOL it sounds corny ...I say it like an Italian Mobster and it's purely playful and the ladies tend to love it. They don't seem to take well to serious pickup lines though... stay away from those LOL! They have heard them before. If I can think of anything else I'll post it. Hope that helps, but if its a lil corny, I'm kinda sorat a goofball and all the ladies kinda like that. I fumble my words all of the time and act like a little kid (at heart), but I'm kind, respectful and cheery and I think they enjoy being around people like that. I don't take life too seriously and am never trying so hard to get into their drawers that it is obvious. I figure it a plus if that happens but that is not my initial phase of attack. Respect first is my motto
SleepingLover Posted March 9, 2005 Posted March 9, 2005 Another thing is to pose this question to the ladies to see varied responses from them. What do you ladies feel is the appropriate way for a man to flirt with you? What is tasteful? What is innappropriate? What examples can you give that are turn ons and turn offs?
Author Montrell274 Posted March 9, 2005 Author Posted March 9, 2005 ok.. you lost me with hard drive buffing....
Author Montrell274 Posted March 10, 2005 Author Posted March 10, 2005 the only thing i understood after all that was saying something then introducing myself. afterwards, i have no idea..
Author Montrell274 Posted March 10, 2005 Author Posted March 10, 2005 the only part i got is saying something to break the ice, and introducing myself. afterwards, i'm still confused. I don't think i'll even get past this part....
SleepingLover Posted March 10, 2005 Posted March 10, 2005 Well, first... most of these that I have said are examples. You gotta be creative and develop what works best for you but there are some dos and don'ts The one about the "..buffing the harddrive.." is a personal thing and relates to what I do for a living and it only works with women whom already are aware of what I do for a living. Again this was just offered as an example. Here are some dos: 1. DO make eye contact! 2. DO be confident! Hold your chin up and don't show any signs of being as scared as you probably are. 3. DO be a gentleman. The majority of women love a gentleman. 4. DO be assertive. Being assertive displays a certain level of self confidence and ambition. 5. DO be a bit mysterious. Women love men whom are a bit mysterious. Giving too much information about yourself and what you do, doesn't offer a challenge. Women want to discover you. 6. DO be inquisitive. Ask her about herself and what she likes to do, what her goals are etc. She wants to talk about herself and wants someone whom is interested in the things she likes to do and her goals. ..and some don'ts: 1. DON'T be arrogant. Its a big turn off if you act like your a stud and feel like you are every woman's desire. 2. DON'T talk about yourself unless asked and then keep it brief. Instead pose questions that get her talking about herself and be a good listener. 3. DON'T make her take charge of the conversation. She most likely wants you to lead. Afterall you are the one who started this . Be sure to keep the conversation going. 4. DON'T bring up or talk about past relationships or other women. She wants you focused on her. 5. DON'T act unnatural! Be calm and don't be stiff. You might be terrified, yes, but displaying too much of that fear can be construed as weakness. Most women want a man who is balanced... a man who is strong on drive and ambition with with a balance of some weakness. Women like to be nurturing but they don't want to be babysitters and want to know they can depend on a man's strengths if they need to. Physical strength is not at issue here. I'm a small guy and very thin, but have never had too many problems getting dates with beautiful women. All that said, I don't go on too many dates only because I'm extremely selective... not superficially, but selective of personality. Everyone has their own tastes whether it be physical or personality-type (or a mixture of both.. I prefer both). If you are under 25 and so are the women you are seeking, then you are probably going to find it a little more difficult. After 25, women on the dating scene are potentially more open to personality rather than just your extrerior looks. Keep this in mind though! Just like the song, every woman IS crazy about a sharp dressed man! Also after 25, they have already dated the jock types and the pretty boys (ack... I've been accused of the latter ) and they may have come to the conclusion that now they are looking for mister right and are on the prowl for something more meaningful. If you can flatter them with humor and your personality then you are on the road to success. Women love to laugh. Have you ever seen a beautiful women with a heavy set, scruffy guy and wondered "wtf?" . Well, chances are that guy makes her laugh and feel alive and he's probably charming and treats her like a queen. Hmmm.. if I think of any more I will post them. If anyone else has some to add , please do.
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