goldengirl11 Posted October 7, 2014 Posted October 7, 2014 (edited) I've developed feelings for a friend who is also in his mid 30's, who I met through a meet up group, initially about a year go. Then we became closer, when we had these great long text conversations most nights, which have fizzled out and sadly, as yet, we've never gone out alone. Apart from him sometimes offering me lifts back from meet ups. As hard as it is, I'm trying to let go and not initiate contact for the foreseeable, as want to see if he contacts me now, as in recent weeks it has usually been me. Another thing, is that a mutual friend recently confessed to me that she liked him, unaware I think that I do too, so am hoping she won't start dating him/beat me to it! She's younger than us (23), very slim and pretty and known him for longer, so think she would probably win, even though he's said before he feels like a married man when he's with her. Also that there's definitely a spark between us (i.e me and him) and are roughly the same age/have similar goals. He last told me a few weeks ago he wasn't with anyone, but fear he's now pursuing someone else. The mutual friend said that he's been hurt before and that it's sometimes difficult to get him to open up. I also feel similarly though, in terms of getting hurt. Thanks Edited October 7, 2014 by goldengirl11
Author goldengirl11 Posted October 7, 2014 Author Posted October 7, 2014 (edited) Turns out they met for lunch on Sunday. Initially she said she met up with a friend, but when I asked what she did she said it was with him for lunch. Admit am shaking a bit, as think I'm going to get hurt. She (mutual friend) also said that a friend of ours likes me, referring to someone else though. I guess I'm feeling upset, as he had on numerous occasions promised we would meet. Feeling a bit embarassed re this thread now, but felt I needed to let it out! Edited October 7, 2014 by goldengirl11
Author goldengirl11 Posted October 7, 2014 Author Posted October 7, 2014 I'm just feeling like a failure with men, with the ones I like anyway!
sdrawkcaB ssA Posted October 7, 2014 Posted October 7, 2014 Odds are you are going to get hurt... it is up to you to find out how he feels by being more open, or to bite your lip as he goes about your mutial friend. I don't think you'll be able to break cleanly by sitting and watching your heart ache.
Author goldengirl11 Posted October 7, 2014 Author Posted October 7, 2014 (edited) So you think I need to tell him? It would be a lot easier in person, but I don't know when I'll see him next. I was thinking about dropping out of this meet up group/ceasing contact with them both, but this mutual friend has still been texting me lately e.g asking how am I etc. Edited October 7, 2014 by goldengirl11
sdrawkcaB ssA Posted October 7, 2014 Posted October 7, 2014 So you think I need to tell him? It would be a lot easier in person, but I don't know when I'll see him next. I was thinking about dropping out of this meet up group/ceasing contact with them both, but this mutual friend has still been texting me lately e.g asking how am I etc. I know it is tough, but i think you know better on when and how to talk with him. Just because he is doing his thing away, his feelings will not sway overnight. So, don't panic, allow for a good time to express, even if it is a nice kiss to make him think about things a bit.
Author goldengirl11 Posted October 7, 2014 Author Posted October 7, 2014 I know it is tough, but i think you know better on when and how to talk with him. Just because he is doing his thing away, his feelings will not sway overnight. So, don't panic, allow for a good time to express, even if it is a nice kiss to make him think about things a bit. Thanks. Just PM'd you. Not sure if it sent or not!
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