Rexxy Posted October 7, 2014 Posted October 7, 2014 I see this girl nearly everyday training at the gym I go to, she trains alone like I do at a quite time. I'm attracted to her because she pushes herself a lot and focuses on what needs to be done in that gym session. She's also quite attractive. We often look at each other and she tends to walk past me a lot quite closely. Every time I go to the gym I tell myself "I'll talk to her today by at least saying hello" But every time the opportunity presents itself I just look at her for a bit then get back to what I'm doing. I have no idea what stops me from simply introducing myself to her. I'm quite introverted and have a very difficult time approaching someone or even having a conversation. I need some advice on how to handle this scenario or I'm going to miss the opportunity and never find out what would of happened if I just said hello.
sid3 Posted October 7, 2014 Posted October 7, 2014 There countless textbooks full of reasons why you have such difficulties. My first guess is that approaching her isn't happening as it causes too much nervousness and anxiety.So you remain frozen in your comfort zone. My only advice, push yourself to take a chance, and remember she's just another girl, not some goddess you've created in your head.
Emilia Posted October 7, 2014 Posted October 7, 2014 I need some advice on how to handle this scenario or I'm going to miss the opportunity and never find out what would of happened if I just said hello. Ask her about what she is training for, pick a particular thing you think she does really well and ask her about it. Men don't tend to ask women on these things so it's quite cool when it happens. I train on my own too quite hard and love to talk about it to people that are interested (see my posts in the physical section here ). If she sticks to the bare minimum, she isn't interested in you. If she goes on to elaborate stuff and asks you questions too, she is interested beyond a friendly chit chat. 1
Author Rexxy Posted October 7, 2014 Author Posted October 7, 2014 There countless textbooks full of reasons why you have such difficulties. My first guess is that approaching her isn't happening as it causes too much nervousness and anxiety.So you remain frozen in your comfort zone. My only advice, push yourself to take a chance, and remember she's just another girl, not some goddess you've created in your head. Yeh I do freeze up completely which I'm sure a lot of people are familiar with. I think the best bet is to approach her as soon as I see her so I don't start coming up with excuses in my head or whatever. Just go for it.
Author Rexxy Posted October 7, 2014 Author Posted October 7, 2014 Ask her about what she is training for, pick a particular thing you think she does really well and ask her about it. Men don't tend to ask women on these things so it's quite cool when it happens. I train on my own too quite hard and love to talk about it to people that are interested (see my posts in the physical section here ). If she sticks to the bare minimum, she isn't interested in you. If she goes on to elaborate stuff and asks you questions too, she is interested beyond a friendly chit chat. I definitely find her style of training quite interesting already. She tends to mix in weights with HIIT, and other things all combined into the one session. I'm pretty sure I'll ask her about her style of sessions and see if I can train with her later on in the week to give it a go. 2
mightycpa Posted October 7, 2014 Posted October 7, 2014 You have an irrational fear. Not sure why that is, but you do. In your mind, you're afraid that if you say Hi, my name is Rexxy. What's yours? she's going to roll her eyes, say OMG out loud and point fingers and laugh at you and tell everybody He likes me! He doesn't even know me, but he likes me! What a loser! Of course, by you reading this, you can see how irrational that fear is, but admit it, there is a kernel of truth in there somewhere. Get over yourself. Just go say hi.
Assasda Posted October 7, 2014 Posted October 7, 2014 If youre a more cerebral type of dude that likes to study. Read about public speaking, and take some tips from that. Also, read about Sales techniques, and approaching people in Sales. If youre more philosophical. Think about that fact, that in 10 years none of this will matter. Then. Approach P.S. Another quick technique about approaching, is to do it right away. At the first sight, so you dont talk yourself out of it
SomeDude16 Posted October 7, 2014 Posted October 7, 2014 Use the gym as your common ground between you two. Intruducd yourself and make a point to talk a little every time you see her at the gym. Do not ask her out at the gym tho. Get her number and call her and ask or catch her at some other time. People don't go to the gym to talk or get hit on, espically women.
Author Rexxy Posted October 9, 2014 Author Posted October 9, 2014 I did it again for gods sake! I had the perfect opportunity to talk to her, she came over to the water fountain when I was there and i just froze up again. I looked at her then walked on to go back to my training. What the hell is wrong with me, something so simple and I can't even get it done. Any advice for this?
sid3 Posted October 9, 2014 Posted October 9, 2014 I did it again for gods sake! I had the perfect opportunity to talk to her, she came over to the water fountain when I was there and i just froze up again. I looked at her then walked on to go back to my training. What the hell is wrong with me, something so simple and I can't even get it done. Any advice for this? Ouch! Completely pussied out eh? Obviously you're scared, question is why.
Author Rexxy Posted October 9, 2014 Author Posted October 9, 2014 Ouch! Completely pussied out eh? Obviously you're scared, question is why. Exactly what I told myself after that happened. Well I'm really not a social person at all, introverted if that makes any difference. I still don't understand how something so simple can be so hard for me. Really annoys me!
sid3 Posted October 9, 2014 Posted October 9, 2014 You've put her on a pedestal. All you have to go on at this point is her appearance. She may in fact not be so wonderful once you've gotten to know her. I'd suggest that old middle school adage that went something like picture them in their underwear if you're nervous, but in your case I think it may backfire and you'd run away. Haha! Seriously though, try a again next time you see her.
Author Rexxy Posted October 9, 2014 Author Posted October 9, 2014 You've put her on a pedestal. All you have to go on at this point is her appearance. She may in fact not be so wonderful once you've gotten to know her. I'd suggest that old middle school adage that went something like picture them in their underwear if you're nervous, but in your case I think it may backfire and you'd run away. Haha! Seriously though, try a again next time you see her. Ok I'll give it a go tomorrow when I see her again. I've got to stop been a pussy! Geeze
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