Do guys go into relationships with girls they don't like? Why do they do that?

October 7, 2014

This is just a curious question. Do guys go into relationships with girls they don't like? I noticed with some of my guy friends they'll go back with their ex, yet they don't seem happy. My one guy friend got mad, and jealous because I was dating someone, but he had a girlfriend so why would he care anyways? He's trying to show me he's mad too, and I think it's so immature, and stupid.

My one guy friend got back with his ex, when he was talking bad about her just 2 months ago saying she's "stuck up" a "bitch" a "whore." He was saying worse things that I won't say, and now he's with her again? So why do guys do this? Is it insecurity? Or are they using the girl to fill the void until someone better comes along? If I don't feel a connection to someone I drop them, but it seems like some of my guy friends will go back to their ex and they seem unhappy. It's odd to me. You guys and gals are intelligent on here, so I would like to hear your opinion on it . Thank you

October 7, 2014

Because those guys have such low self-esteems.

They call girls bitches and whores, because they think of themselves as worst,than that. - Then they also have no problem getting back with them.

Bottom line, the self-esteem is so in the tank. That they settle for any and all warm bodies

October 7, 2014

Some people can't be alone, value themselves by whether or not they're in a RS, worry that they'll never find someone else, are co-dependent, generally bad mouth regardless of their true emotions, etc.

Do you like this jealous, bad-mouthing guy friend of yours? If not, why do you keep him around? This may give you an answer...

October 7, 2014

Yes to what umirano and Assasda wrote. I'm for live and let live, but it is frustrating when I've seen a friend do it or a girl I've liked doing it. Its not just exclusive to guys by any means.

Yes, some people will use another person to fill the void until someone better comes along, but I would not go as far as saying they don't like the person they're with. Its more usually they just don't have strong feelings for the person. At least with that they have a exit plan, and haven't resigned themselves to the fact they can't do any better (the equivalent or better in terms of looks/social status & also how well they want to be treated).

I guess some people can get hung up on the good times they had in the relationship, and live for these times/memories. I can't say for sure as I couldn't do it. I'm a person that reckons its better to be single than stuck in a crappy dysfunctional relationship.

October 7, 2014

For the majority of guys it can be very difficult to get any interest from girls they like - take a look at this board for examples. As such, when a guy breaks up with someone he's also very likely to be giving up regular sex and affection for quite some time, and faced with a prospect of a Herculean effort in dating to find someone new and better. Faced with that prospect, it's no wonder many guys can't be bothered and just stick with what they've got as long as it's tolerable most of the time.

Not something I personally agree with, but it's a pretty easy perspective to understand.

October 7, 2014

People go back with their Ex's out of desperation.

First they break up, go back to the dating scene...realize the dating scene sucks...and then go back with their ex (someone they've always been familiar with).

This is just a curious question. Do guys go into relationships with girls they don't like? I noticed with some of my guy friends they'll go back with their ex, yet they don't seem happy. My one guy friend got mad, and jealous because I was dating someone, but he had a girlfriend so why would he care anyways? He's trying to show me he's mad too, and I think it's so immature, and stupid.

My one guy friend got back with his ex, when he was talking bad about her just 2 months ago saying she's "stuck up" a "bitch" a "whore." He was saying worse things that I won't say, and now he's with her again? So why do guys do this? Is it insecurity? Or are they using the girl to fill the void until someone better comes along? If I don't feel a connection to someone I drop them, but it seems like some of my guy friends will go back to their ex and they seem unhappy. It's odd to me. You guys and gals are intelligent on here, so I would like to hear your opinion on it . Thank you

October 7, 2014

Some people can't be alone, value themselves by whether or not they're in a RS, worry that they'll never find someone else, are co-dependent, generally bad mouth regardless of their true emotions, etc.

Do you like this jealous, bad-mouthing guy friend of yours? If not, why do you keep him around? This may give you an answer...

I don't like him. I don't keep him around either. I just notice that about him, but I am not really close to him or anything. I see what you mean! I can't stand it that people can't be alone. Because I have been alone and yeah it sucks, but I don't know why people feel like they need someone else to complete them. I need to find my own happiness, and I know going into a relationship won't be the ticket.

October 7, 2014

Yes to what umirano and Assasda wrote. I'm for live and let live, but it is frustrating when I've seen a friend do it or a girl I've liked doing it. Its not just exclusive to guys by any means.

Yes, some people will use another person to fill the void until someone better comes along, but I would not go as far as saying they don't like the person they're with. Its more usually they just don't have strong feelings for the person. At least with that they have a exit plan, and haven't resigned themselves to the fact they can't do any better (the equivalent or better in terms of looks/social status & also how well they want to be treated).
I guess some people can get hung up on the good times they had in the relationship, and live for these times/memories. I can't say for sure as I couldn't do it. I'm a person that reckons its better to be single than stuck in a crappy dysfunctional relationship.

I know, me too! I can't be in a dysfunctional relationship. That is why I am single and i am alone all the time because I just can't deal with unnecessary drama like that in my life. You're right! But it just seems like he doesn't like her because he talked so bad about her that he made it really seem like he despised her. Then he gets back with her. It doesn't make any sense lol. Thank you

October 7, 2014

I feel the same about men who complain about their wives. I think "well why the did you marry her then?"

Same story.

October 7, 2014

I don't like him. I don't keep him around either. I just notice that about him, but I am not really close to him or anything. I see what you mean! I can't stand it that people can't be alone. Because I have been alone and yeah it sucks, but I don't know why people feel like they need someone else to complete them. I need to find my own happiness, and I know going into a relationship won't be the ticket.

Here are some reasons, but of course these people will never admit it

1. All their friends are in relationships, and they feel the need to

2. Low self esteem

3. They are not independent

4. They are useless alone i.e. have always had everything done for them by mummy and daddy

5. Entitlement hogs

6. Need other to carry their baggage for them (single mums with kids, and trying to put a roof over their heads)

7. I can go on but you get the gist

I have known people to say they can't even go to a restaurant or movies by themselves...heck I do it all the time when I feel like it, and don't even think twice.

Usually goes something like this..."table for how many?.....one please"

October 7, 2014

Guys can be lonely, or not want to be alone.

More common than most women might realize, sometimes something happens that really hurts the man. So that's where he lashes out calling her names. Inside he still cares for her, but he is on the defensive and doesn't want to appear vulnerable, especially to those close tohim.

HE might lash out yet still deeply care for her.

As for being with a girl they generally aren't interested in, that does happen. I've done it before and had interest grow into something awesome. I've also done it before and realized why I wasn't interested and ended it.

There is a handful of reason why this happens. Genuine interest shouldn't be too hard to fish out.

October 7, 2014

I started to settle for numerous reasons.

My most recent ex was chubby and sort of cute. But she did have a great career, what seemed like good friends and a lot of other positives. She had been divorced and had kids both used to be deal breakers. But I've come to learn being 30 and finding women who are single, have no kids, a career and so on is difficult. Thus I settle..

What I did not know was she had an issue being honest and loyal. Then I got HSV-2 (genital herpes). Despite her being a horrible girl friend, i tried to make something work with her. I did it in part because I now have herpes and knew dating would be hard. As would getting laid. I finally got fed up with her promiscuous behaivor and walked. But that's why I settled..

Now that I have HSV-2 dating has become a million times more complicated. I just learned a hard lesson. I met a beautiful woman that has hsv -2, has no kids, has a career, never been married and is everything I want. I let things move way to fast...

October 7, 2014

I think they call these girls names because they are angry at themselves for still wanting them. Usually they are hung up on the sex and go back even though when they get back they have the same problems as before.

October 7, 2014

I think they call these girls names because they are angry at themselves for still wanting them. Usually they are hung up on the sex and go back even though when they get back they have the same problems as before.

Exactly! It is usually the same problems as before! It the same thing over and over again. It starts off good for them, then it turns extremely turbulent he'll hook up with a bunch of other women, then she gets jealous and then they get back together and that is what they have been doing for the past year and a half now, and I always say to him "Aren't you fed up?" He never gives me a clear answer, it's always garbled lol. I just don't get why someone puts up with that emotional turbulence, just me hearing about it from my guy friend, makes my head spin lol. I can't imagine why his girlfriend puts up with that crap. It's so odd, because if it always ends bad and it's the same old song and dance, then why even keep going back to each other? Makes no sense to me at all, because I wouldn't put up with that crap, not at all!

October 7, 2014

Guys can be lonely, or not want to be alone.

More common than most women might realize, sometimes something happens that really hurts the man. So that's where he lashes out calling her names. Inside he still cares for her, but he is on the defensive and doesn't want to appear vulnerable, especially to those close tohim.

HE might lash out yet still deeply care for her.

As for being with a girl they generally aren't interested in, that does happen. I've done it before and had interest grow into something awesome. I've also done it before and realized why I wasn't interested and ended it.

There is a handful of reason why this happens. Genuine interest shouldn't be too hard to fish out.

Yeah I was thinking that. I didn't know guys actually settled like that! It's really weird because it's the same old song and dance for my guy friend. Him and his girlfriend will get back together it goes really good and, then it goes extremely turbulent, and they get vicious with each other, then they break up and he goes out with other women and she hears about it so then she gets jealous and contacts him, and then they get back together again. It has been the same thing for a year and a half now and I don't know why they put up with each other's turbulence like that. If it always ends bad, then why keep going back to each other? Then when he is with her it seems that he is still unhappy, and that is really baffling. Because I wouldn't put up with that emotional turbulence and dysfunction. That is just odd. Your insight seems to be on point. Thank you.

October 7, 2014

Here are some reasons, but of course these people will never admit it

1. All their friends are in relationships, and they feel the need to
2. Low self esteem
3. They are not independent
4. They are useless alone i.e. have always had everything done for them by mummy and daddy
5. Entitlement hogs
6. Need other to carry their baggage for them (single mums with kids, and trying to put a roof over their heads)
7. I can go on but you get the gist

I have known people to say they can't even go to a restaurant or movies by themselves...heck I do it all the time when I feel like it, and don't even think twice.

Usually goes something like this..."table for how many?.....one please"

Hahaha. Exactly! You are so on point. I am so sick of hearing my guy friend. Because it's the same thing over and over again. They start off really good, then their relationship becomes turbulent and they get vicious with each other. Then they break up and he starts going out with other women, and then she gets jealous or he still contacts his ex and they somehow get back together. But that is seriously what they do over and over again, and I always say to him "Aren't you fed up? Isn't she fed up?" He never gives me a clear answer then when he's not with her he'll talk bad about her, it's so weird to me. Even when he's with her it seems he is still unhappy. That is so odd to me. Then my other guy friend keeps going back to his ex and they have a weird relationship. I don't know why they put up with the dysfunction? I wouldn't put up with that constant turbulence and back and forth crap of getting back together and then breaking up, way too much to deal with lol. Your examples really are accurate though. You're so on point with that. Thanks!

October 7, 2014

Some people really seem to get off on that kind of drama. It seems that hating somebody doesn't kill attraction.

October 7, 2014

Hahaha. Exactly! You are so on point. I am so sick of hearing my guy friend. Because it's the same thing over and over again. They start off really good, then their relationship becomes turbulent and they get vicious with each other. Then they break up and he starts going out with other women, and then she gets jealous or he still contacts his ex and they somehow get back together. But that is seriously what they do over and over again, and I always say to him "Aren't you fed up? Isn't she fed up?" He never gives me a clear answer then when he's not with her he'll talk bad about her, it's so weird to me. Even when he's with her it seems he is still unhappy. That is so odd to me. Then my other guy friend keeps going back to his ex and they have a weird relationship. I don't know why they put up with the dysfunction? I wouldn't put up with that constant turbulence and back and forth crap of getting back together and then breaking up, way too much to deal with lol. Your examples really are accurate though. You're so on point with that. Thanks!

You are welcome...I am usually that voice i.e. what people don't want to hear, and I wouldn't be honest with myself if am just jumping on the bandwagon, and just giving people what they want.

Honesty has always been my best policy in my business and personal life. Misery loves company, and delusional folks will always surround themselves with like minded people.

As to your friend, could you imagine if the unfourtunate happens and they bring a child/ren into the equation? It's sad for me to say this, but some women just prefer the cheating, lies, violent, caustic type of relationships and don't know any better.

People usally bring up the word "love" on here, and am yet to get out of anyone, what they actually mean by the word, which more than often to me sounds like they are talking about infatuation.

Oh...as a side note if I may? You sound like someone that has their head screwed on, and that is good for a young person considering all the nonsense out there that young women and men get involved in i.e. Facebook, Instagram and Twitter drama, gossip, etc.

My comments are from life lessons, outlook on life and being a veteran at dating As usual you can drop the cheque in the post

October 7, 2014

I should add this can happen for numerous reasons.

If they have dated the person before and were treated badly. It typically stems from the fact that the person was ALMOST perfect. Maybe honesty was an issue, maybe commitment was what was missing. But everything else was perfect. So we hope that perhaps the lights will come on and that one thing that keeps them from being perfect will change.

If they are dating someone that they are settling for. It can be because of the "as good as it gets syndrome" is this as good as things will get? I've let great women go for stupid reasons. Now I end up staying in relationships I shouldn't.

Dating for guys is not nearly as easy as it is for women. I know a lot of women don't believe this but the simple truth it's not. Any women can go to any bar or club and get a few numbers. Women on dating sites get hundreds of messages, men can send out 150 messages and get NO responses.

For guys it's much more difficult, it's also much more difficult for men to get laid. Most women have access to a few men they could have sex with if they wanted, all the woman has to do is try. Maybe it's a coworker or maybe it's a male friend. Granted not all will but I have a ton of female friends and they all have a few men that would. Most of the women do not know it but the make friend would.

October 7, 2014

I should add this can happen for numerous reasons.

If they have dated the person before and were treated badly. It typically stems from the fact that the person was ALMOST perfect. Maybe honesty was an issue, maybe commitment was what was missing. But everything else was perfect. So we hope that perhaps the lights will come on and that one thing that keeps them from being perfect will change.

If they are dating someone that they are settling for. It can be because of the "as good as it gets syndrome" is this as good as things will get? I've let great women go for stupid reasons. Now I end up staying in relationships I shouldn't.

Dating for guys is not nearly as easy as it is for women. I know a lot of women don't believe this but the simple truth it's not. Any women can go to any bar or club and get a few numbers. Women on dating sites get hundreds of messages, men can send out 150 messages and get NO responses.

For guys it's much more difficult, it's also much more difficult for men to get laid. Most women have access to a few men they could have sex with if they wanted, all the woman has to do is try. Maybe it's a coworker or maybe it's a male friend. Granted not all will but I have a ton of female friends and they all have a few men that would. Most of the women do not know it but the make friend would.

It's true that we can get laid easier but I think as far as relationships and commitment go it's more difficult for women. Men want sex, women want relationships, generally...hence the games and drama.

October 7, 2014

Ashley S, perfect reply, the one I was hoping for. I think you'll be fine. You have your head on your shoulders.

October 8, 2014

For the majority of guys it can be very difficult to get any interest from girls they like - take a look at this board for examples. As such, when a guy breaks up with someone he's also very likely to be giving up regular sex and affection for quite some time, and faced with a prospect of a Herculean effort in dating to find someone new and better. Faced with that prospect, it's no wonder many guys can't be bothered and just stick with what they've got as long as it's tolerable most of the time.

Not something I personally agree with, but it's a pretty easy perspective to understand.

Agreed ^^, I think this applies to some women too...They rather be with "someone" rather than alone...

I think this is the same reason why guys stay in sucky marriages and are grateful when the wife breaks them off some sex once in a blue moon - cuz by then they even got kids and would probably be ruined by divorce.

October 8, 2014

Agreed ^^, I think this applies to some women too...They rather be with "someone" rather than alone...

I think this is the same reason why guys stay in sucky marriages and are grateful when the wife breaks them off some sex once in a blue moon - cuz by then they even got kids and would probably be ruined by divorce.

Unfortunately there are a lot of men like this out there, and some women too i.e. too afraid to end a miserable marriage where they are already living as room mates, barely talking to each other and just presenting a facade' of united front to their friends and family.

Why delay the inevitable?

October 8, 2014

Easy access to sex? You see it as a rocky relationship, he sees it as a comfortable f**k buddy arrangement.

October 8, 2014

I had an awful case where I think the guy is plain and simple, being a dick.

He claimed that he'd had a crush on me for years and that I was his "dream girl". We were very good friends for about 10 years.

He was with his girlfriend for 3 years when he told me he had always liked me. Throughout that 3 years, even before telling me he liked me, he always told me how he didn't really like his girlfriend, she was psycho, annoying, they never had sex, etc... blah blah that whole routine.

Well, turned out I liked him too, and in my silly head I thought "I like him, he likes me, he doesn't like his girlfriend, so he will finally just end things with her and we will start dating."

LOL no, that's no what happened. He put it off, made excuses, strung me along for almost a year, and finally I realized he was making a fool of me and I took off for good, and ended the friendship. At some point after we stopped being friends, they broke up and got back together. Yeah, the dude who acted so desperate to be free from her, got back with her. Huh. Haha.

So, it wasn't about waiting for "something better", because he claimed I was the dream girl he always wanted (some bullcrap), and me being so desperate to be wanted, latched onto that like a lovesick schoolgirl. And clearly, the "I hate my girlfriend" show was bullcrap too.

Guys like this are just bullcrapping.

Sign In

Do guys go into relationships with girls they don't like? Why do they do that?

Recommended Posts

Ashley S

Assasda

umirano

ascendotum

Andy_K

irc333

Ashley S

Ashley S

mammasita

Tayken

Keenly

Dork Vader

stillafool

Ashley S

Ashley S

Ashley S

Woggle

Tayken

Dork Vader

Temporarilyinsane

umirano

Gloria25

Tayken

Elle1975

Phoe

What's New

My Activity Streams

More...